Monday Night Raw - February 7th 1994

• The show opens with a recap of IRS’s interaction with Marty Jannetty and the injured 1-2-3 Kid last week to build up his match with Marty tonight but I’m too distracted by the weirdest commentary duo of all time - Vince McMahon and Bastion Booger? He’s eating relentlessly and I can already tell this is going to be a challenge to listen to. 

• The opening match is Billy and Bart Gunn vs. Barry Horowitz and Reno Riggins. The Gunns win this exhibition match with their double team finisher which I don’t think has a name. 
• After a brief recap of the events of the Royal Rumble between the Hart brothers, we get footage of their interviews on the previous weekend’s All American Wrestling - Owen says he enjoyed kicking Bret and letting out his years of frustration at Bret and being in his shadow while Bret is sad about having to fight his brother. He can’t forgive Owen for turning this physical, and he can’t forgive himself for letting it get this far. He hopes that at Wrestlemania he can beat some sense into Owen and save their relationship. Good stuff.

• Owen Hart is in action next. He’s greeted by loud “we want Bret” chants. He goes to give a kid in the front row his sunglasses ala Bret but then snaps them in half instead! I love it. He screams that at Wrestlemania he’s going to “beat Bret’s head in” which is a confusing insult. Owen makes John Paul tap out to the Sharpshooter as Vince speculates that Owen might try to cost his brother the WWF Championship at Wrestlemania one way or the other.
• Paul Bearer is at the graveyard imploring all of us to keep the faith and that his Undertaker SHALL return. I think he might be right.

• Irwin R. Schyster takes on Marty Jannetty in this week’s non-jobber squash match. We usually get at least one proper talent vs. proper talent match. As IRS and Marty go back and forth WWF Tag Team Champions The Quebecers come down to ringside and get some cheap shots in on Marty on the outside. They were then ejected from ringside during the commercial break to leave Marty one on one with IRS. Irwin grinds him down with a long sleeper hold but just as Party Marty starts to mount a comeback, The Quebecer’s manager Johnny Polo comes down to the ring for a closer look. That brings out Intercontinental Champion Razor Ramon who’s had issues with IRS but also is buddies with Marty. He’s followed by The Quebecers again who circle Razor on the outside. This is chaotic. Polo hits Marty while the referee is distracted which gives IRS the victory so Razor attacks him. He’s then jumped two on one by the Tag Team Champions but Marty gets back up and its Razor and Marty who have the last laugh and clear them out of the ring. Really impressively Razor even hits the Razor’s Edge on the massive Jacques. IRS wins the match but Razor and Marty have beef with The Quebecers and Johnny Polo now.

• After the commercial break, Vince tell us that while next week’s Raw is preempted for the Westminster Dog Show (yes, really) in two weeks, Razor and Marty will challenge for the WWF Tag Team Championships on the next episode of Raw.
• Thurman “Sparky” Plugg makes his singles debut against Duane Gill. Vince hammers home his dual career as a wrestler and a stockcar driver. He wins this with an ugly looking splash off the top rope. I was distracted by Bastion Booger “choking” and gagging on his food through most of this.

• During the Wrestlemania Report, Todd Pettengill hypes ticket sales for the theatre next door to Madison Square Garden. The actual arena is sold out but you can still sit in a big cinema next door and watch the show live with other fans which does sound quite cool. He reminds us of the coin toss last week and then the three matches confirmed this far, which I covered in last month’s article. It’s a shame they hadn’t just invented the triple threat match a few years earlier but I’ll talk properly about the odd booking at Wrestlemania. Jim Cornette addresses the coin flip and the unfairness of Yoko having to face Lugar first - his illegal bodyslam was allowed last July, and he used his illegal metal forearm at Summerslam and keeps being allowed to cheat. He’s a very good promo. There’s also big news of a fourth match for the show - Macho Man vs. Crush in the WWF’s first ever Falls Count Anywhere match. It has weird rules, but I’ll talk about that on the show too. He also plugs the various celebrity appearances on the show, and the mystery special guest referees for both WWF Championship matches. 

• Crush, with Mr. Fuji, takes on a guy in strippy yellow and black gear. Missed a trick not calling himself Bumble.B. Bumble or something. He’d probably have been hired in this era! Vince spends much of this match talking about Macho Man’s interview in that month’s WWF Magazine and how the Falls Count Anywhere match could end anywhere in MSG at Wrestlemania. Crush wins with the Kona Crush head vice and celebrates with Fuji’s Japanese flag. 
• The end of Raw has the WWF Tag Team Champions and Johnny Polo screaming about how the next Raw is a conspiracy - the Quebecers shouldn’t have to face Marty and Razor and then Bastion Booger cheerfully eating dog biscuits. Incredible stuff. 

Monday Night Raw - February 21st 1994

• Minor audio glitch to start Raw as The Qubebecer’s theme starts but then quickly changes to Macho Man’s music and the crowd goes nuts! He’s on commentary with Vince tonight. I love Randy but his openly banter about being the President of his own fan club is weird. 
• The opening match is my boys The Quebecers defending their Tag Team Championships against Intercontinental Champion Razor Ramon and Marty Jannetty. One last twist however - it’s not Marty, it’s the 1-2-3 Kid. He’s all healed up. So where is Marty? Sadly a jobber was paralysed during a match with Marty a couple of years prior and had launched a lawsuit against both Marty and the WWF. It was never confirmed that this lawsuit is why he was taken off TV again but they’ve never denied that either. Marty is gone once again, but honestly the 1-2-3 Kid going from rivals to friends with Razor is a better story even if they’ve literally never explained how that came to be - Razor turned face and was instantly best buddies with the Kid who he had hated weeks prior. They were best of friends in real life so don’t think too much about it. Razor takes out Johnny Polo with a Razor’s Edge on the outside to even up the odds and give him and the Kid a chance to win the Tag Team titles for real. Vince mentions that Razor now has his own Wrestlemania match confirmed now - more on that later in the show. The Kid has graduated from being a jobber and gets the chance to control this match, working on Jacques leg and demonstrating his wrestling skills. As he and Razor dominate, Diesel comes to ringside and silently watches which distracts them and allows Jacques and Pierre to take over and isolate the Kid, hammering on his recently injured leg. Diesel is here because he’s the bodyguard of Shawn Michaels, Razor Ramon’s Wrestlemania opponent (I told you, more on that later!) Razor finally gets the hot tag and after a long match, razor hits Jacques with the Razor’s Edge. He has the Tag Team titles won, but Shawn Michaels comes sprinting through the crowd to break up the pin right in front of the referee. Razor and The Kid win by disqualification, but that means no titles for them. Razor climbs the ropes and he and Shawn (backed up by Diesel) talk trash to each other from a safe distance. 

• Next week on Raw, Yokozuna defends the WWF Championship against Macho Man Randy Savage! Macho says that next week he will turn Wrestlemania upside down by winning the Title and then facing both Lex Lugar and Bret Hart and beating them too! That would be awesome. Jim Cornette comes to the ring and after a little trash talk directed at Macho about that, representing Yoko as his American spokesman, he introduces Doctor of Desire Tom Prichard. One half of the Heavenly Bodies vs. Bret “Hitman” Hart. Two actual star vs. star matches on the same Raw! Well, “Star” relatively speaking - Bret is obviously a LOT higher in the pecking order than Tom Prichard. During this match, Donnie Wahlberg calls in. He’s one of the celebrity ring announcers at Wrestlemania X. Bit of fun trivia - Donnie tried to get his brother Mark on the show too but Vince rejected that because he wasn’t famous enough. Hilarious in hindsight because Mark Wahlberg is FAR more famous and successful than his brother Donnie now. Vince talks about sibling rivalries, comparing himself and Marky Mark to Bret and Owen, which Donnie shoots down - he and Mark have NEVER had any issues. Jim Cornette tries to hit Bret Hart with his tennis racket on the outside so Macho Man goes over to put a stop to it, knocking out Cornette and stealing his tennis racket. Bret’s finishing sequence is cut off by Tom and he’s knocked out of the ring which brings Owen down. He “helps” his brother back into the ring and argues with fans about who the best Hart is while Bret quickly finishes off Prichard with the Sharpshooter. Owen seems shocked. Bret challenges Owen to come back and get in the ring and face him like a man but referees are there to hold them both back. 

• In this week’s Wrestlemania Report, Todd runs down all the celebrities who’ll be in the house (I’ve never heard of most of them) but the part I am interested in is three Championship matches confirmed - Razor vs. Shawn as mentioned in the “first ever” ladder match, which I’ll have a lot more to talk about on the night, and The Quebecers defend the Tag Team titles against Men on a Mission. In addition, Alundra Blayze defends her Women’s Championship against an unnamed opponent, Doink and Dink face Bam Bam Bigelow and Luna Vachon in a mixed tag team match and Ludvig Borga faces Earthquake. Except no, no he won’t. They didn’t know how bad Borga’s ankle injury was which I mentioned at the Royal Rumble but he’s done and won’t be back on TV. A stacked Wrestlemania card, using what’s available.

• Raw concludes with Yokozuna coming out with Jim Cornette encouraging him to attack Macho Man for what he did earlier. A little bit of extra sauce for their WWF Championship match next week which I thought was going to be a promo or a fight but ends with a staredown instead. This was a night of “opponent in the ring having a staredown with opponent on the entrance ramp” 

Monday Night Raw - February 28th 1994

• Here’s the video that opened Raw because it does a good job of recapping the whole Bret/Lex Royal Rumble match situation as well as some hype for tonight’s big WWF Championship main event!

• We waste zero time and go right into that very match! Macho Man Randy Savage vs. Yokozuna for the WWF Championship. Heel manager Harvey Whippleman joins Vince McMahon on commentary tonight - another weird combo. They move at a million miles an hour in this one and Yoko to his credit keeps up. The fans are LOUD for Macho and he bounces around and charges at Yoko getting near falls from clotheslines and taking control with an axe handle off the top all the way to the floor. Randy is like a man possessed and Vince does a good job on commentary hammering home how Randy is obsessed with being WWF Champion for a third time. Randy withstands Yoko’s abuse and avoids a legdrop to stay in the match. Cornette distracts the referee and the champion tries to use Fuji’s salt bucket as a weapon but it backfires and Macho Man knocks him out with it instead! It takes him way too long to make the cover and Yokozuna kicks out but his patented top rope elbow drop connects. It’s over and Macho has the title won but Crush runs down and breaks up the pin, causing a disqualification right in front of the referee. The fans loudly chant for Lugar to come and make the save as Crush and Yoko attack him two on one. They get Bret Hart instead. He’s overwhelmed too. Lugar finally joins the attack and with a three on two advantage, Yoko and Crush are cleared out of the ring but it’s Bret, Lex and Macho who end up on top. Vince really hammers home that Crush just stole the WWF Championship from Randy Savage which must have broken his heart. 

• Bam Bam Bigelow takes on Mike Khourey (I think that’s how it was spelt). The highlight here is Luna’s awesome anti-Doink t-shirt which she wears to accompany her man to the thing. A dominant one-sided victory. I thought we might have seen Doink during this but Bam Bam finished up unmolested. 

• A great commercial for Wrestlemania X - the WWF returns to Broadway. You can also see Yokozuna absolutely MURDER a jobber with his Banzai drop which I mentioned a few weeks ago.

• Earthquake, who returned a few weeks ago (I think he was in Japan?) battles The Black Phantom, who is probably one of the usual jobber crew but in a black mask. Vince confirms during this match that his Wrestlemania match with Ludvig Borga has been cancelled as Borga is injured/gone so he’s now facing Adam Bomb, which Harvey Whippleman is very excited to talk about as Bomb’s manager. Quake has no problem winning this with his classic Earthquake sit-down butt splash which I don’t know the name of. The Aftershock? That’s a cool name, that’s what I’ll call it. 
• Todd Pettengill runs down the card for Wrestlemania - one new match added to the show this week, a 10 man tag team match. There is a plug for the Fan Fest, which will take place that weekend. 1994’s version of what became Axxess during the Attitude era. 

• Kwang faces Tom Chrystal. Harvey leaves commentary for this match to be at ringside for his client, Kwang. Not sure he’ll need the support against Tom. Enormously dated 1994 pop culture references during this as Vince takes a call from Sy Sperling who rang or was the face or or owned “the hairclub for men” which was a big thing at the time. Ring announcer Howard Finkle is getting his hair done and will unveil his new hair, courtesy of Sy Sperling, at Wrestlemania. Yeah I’ve no idea either. Kwang wins with a straight kick to the chest to little reaction from the fans.

• Stan Lane interviews Shawn Michaels in his dressing room. HBK is wearing only a towel, his sunglasses and his Intercontinental title belt. Stan recaps the storyline - he was stripped of the title, Razor won the vacant belt and is the legit champion and reminds us of his attacks including at the Royal Rumble. Michaels mocks Razor, calls him a fake champion and promises to climb the ladder at Wrestlemania, claim BOTH title belts and prove he is the Undisputed Intercontinental Champion. This was good stuff.