Monday Night Raw - May 2nd, 1994

• Raw opens with the big WWF Tag Team title match. Vince gives us some history - Samu and Fatu’s current manager Afa is also a former Tag Team Champion and HIS manager at the time was Captain Lou Albano, hence his connection to this team. Jacques and Pierre have done a good job of making the Headshrinkers look like killers, so afraid of them! Six weeks of build to this moment. This is a pretty good match - The Quebecers try to walk out on the match but the referee rules that if they’re counted out they’ll lose the titles. When they come back they isolate and work over Fatu but a hot tag to Samu changes the tide and in a really exciting chaotic finish, Fatu splashes Jacques and The Headshrinkers win the Tag Team titles! The fans go nuts and Captain Lou runs around screaming. In a nice moment, Samu and Fatu actually hand both their title belts to Afa and they give him some love. I wanted a nice photo of them with their belts but the arena lights went out during their celebration for some reason. 
• In the first King of the Ring report, Todd Pettengill hypes up ticket sales and explains how the King of the Ring tournament works. There’s no matches announced for the PPV yet but qualifying matches start this weekend. IRS vs. Scott Steiner (I’ve already told you the Steiners are gone so there’s no shocks on who wins that) and next week on Raw, Razor Ramon vs. Kwang. BIG news - Razor is no longer the Intercontinental Champion. More on that in a bit. Todd also mentions that NFL hall of famer Art Donovan will be on commentary. Oh dear. 

• Vince and Macho Man talk to Chief Jay Strongbow who confirms that Tatanka is indeed on the warpath after IRS destroyed his ceremonial headdress. That leads neatly into Tatanka vs. a jobber whose surname is Domino. Feels like he’s missing a trick with plain black ring gear. IRS calls in during this and says he can’t wait to face Tatanka in the ring - he should have paid the gift tax and he wouldn’t have had to destroy his headdress. Tatanka wins with the Papoose to Go.

• Jerry Lawler hosts ANOTHER King’s Court. He spends the first few minutes insulting Roddy Piper. Hot Rod is still doing a weekly segment on the weekend shows called Bottom Line. King keeps mocking Roddy for his age (they’re almost exactly the same age) and calls both Roddy and “Piper’s Pit” a dinosaur. From there he moves onto his actual guest this week, the NEW Intercontinental Champion Diesel. He defeated Razor Ramon on Superstars to claim the title, thanks to Shawn Michaels and an exposed turnbuckle. King asks Diesel’s permission to call him “cool daddy” and he has to correct him that his nickname is actually Big Daddy Cool. They mock Razor Ramon for not being such a bad guy after all - he wasn’t bad enough to stop Diesel from taking his title. King asks what is next for Big Daddy Cool? He says he’s really happy to be Intercontinental Champion, but he has his eyes set on Bret Hart and the WWF Championship next. King laughs and says Bret is too much of a coward to accept a challenge. 

There’s a little montage of some of the recent Undertaker signings. Do you believe any of them? My favourite is the kid who saw him slide down their slide. I hope that one is true.

• Former WWF Champion Yokozuna faces two opponents in a handicap match. Yoko slaps around Scott Taylor and Mike Davis and after some brutal slams, stacks them on top of each other and Banzai drops them both. Brutal. Yoko keeps the beating going and gives Mike Davis a second Banzai but before he can deliver a third, Earthquake comes down and chases him off. After a commercial break, Quake speaks to Vince and Macho and he challenges Yokozuna to a match to see who the best big man in the WWF is. There’s a little plug for next week’s King of the Ring qualifiers and we’re out. Side note, I get a real kick out of seeing Vince and Macho laugh together. Vince is clearly cracked up by Macho’s nonsense and his smiles and laughs always seem so genuine. Maybe he wasn’t always a monster. 

Monday Night Raw - May 9th, 1994

• Raw opens with a King of the Ring qualifying match. Razor Ramon battles Kwang. Macho hilariously picks Kwang to win this match, but does mention that he did well against Bret Hart a few weeks ago which is kind of true. IRS defeated Scott Steiner to qualify already for this year’s tournament. Kwang puts up a bit of a fight but a Razor’s Edge puts the masked man in his place and Razor Ramon moves forward in the King of the Ring tournament. 
• Todd Pettengill brings us another King of the Ring report. The brackets are updated but I’ve just told you IRS and Razor have qualified. Next week’s Raw will feature Bam Bam vs. Sparky Plugg in another qualifier and the winner of that will meet Razor Ramon in the quarter finals. In other, bigger news - Rowdy Roddy Piper is stepping back into the ring to face Jerry Lawler at the King of the Ring PPV. There’s footage from the previous weekend’s Bottom Line where from his trailer on the set of his current movie, Roddy explains that there’s no such thing as a King. I’m not convinced that’s true? The important thing is that he accepts Lawler’s challenge, and he mentions King calling a bunch of kids who are sick in a children’s hospital brats to goad him into a match. I don’t remember that happening either, but Roddy says that when he beats Lawler at the PPV his winnings will go to the children’s hospital. Todd specifies that a “portion of Piper’s earnings” will go to the hospital, not the whole amount. That feels kind of disingenuous of him but who am I to judge?

• Crush with Master Fuji faces Ray Roy, who has massive teeth and a GI Joe haircut. Maybe the mullet is finally starting to die out? Crush throws Ray around with a massive Gorilla press slam and finishes him with his new finishing move, the Heart Punch. A stiff punch to the chest. 
• Duke “The Dumpster” Droese comes to us from the garbage dump. There’s no mountain of trash big enough to stop him from climbing to the top of the WWF. Inspirational.

• On WWF Superstars, Jerry Lawler was insulting and abusing little Dink, while Doink was on vacation. Doink then came out, much to everyone’s shock and slammed a cream pie in Dink’s face and covered him in silly string. Has Doink turned heel? Nope, it’s Jeff Jarrett disguised as Doink! Jarrett and King have a good laugh at Dink and Doink’s expense. That leads into Doink’s match tonight which he wins with the Whoopee Cushion off the top rope. Jeff Jarrett called in during this to laugh about what he did to Doink and bicker with Macho Man - it feels like they might be teasing a match between Double J and Macho Man down the line, which I’d enjoy.

• There’s a video package about Earthquake’s history as a legit sumo wrestler. He has the best won-loss record of any Westerner in sumo history, or did at the time at least. He says he still has a lot to prove in the WWF and up next Yokozuna is the guest on the King’s Court. Will he accept Earthquake’s challenge? Before introducing Yoko, King responds to Piper’s comments from earlier and says he wishes Piper would accept his challenge to be a guest on the King’s Court so they can talk about this in person. Yokozuna has Mr. Fuji and Jim Cornette with him when he comes out, as always. Jim does all the talking, as normal. He spends a lot of time making fun of Earthquake’s history as a sumo wrestler and talks about how Yokozuna isn’t actually a name, it’s the highest achievable rank in sumo wrestling (which is true) and accepts Earthquake’s challenge to a match, but wants it under sumo rules. They’ll remove the ring ropes and the first man to know their opponent out of the ring wins. King says that Earthquake is too much of a coward to accept but Cornette challenges him to a sumo match next week. I’m sure Earthquake will accept and Macho Man confirms during the next match that he has. 

• There’s another montage of goofs who claim to have spotted The Undertaker out in the wild. He was sleeping in someone’s garden! 
• Mabel goes one on one with Mike Bell. Vince and Macho talk about both Mabel’s King of the Ring qualifier against Quebecer Pierre, and how well he’s been doing as a singles wrestler since Mo got injured by Owen Hart. He actually shows off a little wrestling here with a snapmare, short arm scissors and a suplex. A big running leg drop and a urinage slam gives the 500lbs Mabel an easy victory.
• At the end of Raw, Jerry Lawler interviews Earthquake backstage and he officially accepts Yokozuna’s challenge and screams that he’s going to kick Yokozuna’s butt. 

Monday Night Raw - May 16th, 1994

• Raw opens with a video promoting tonight’s main event. They’re making a big deal of Earthquake and his match with Yoko tonight. That’ll seem really weird in hindsight but I’ll explain why at the end of the show.
• The opening match is a King of the Ring qualifier between Sparky Plugg and Bam Bam Bigelow. Macho calls this the biggest match in Plugg’s career so far, which it is. Bam Bam of course got to the finals last year so must be a favourite, even if he’s done nothing since. Bam Bam hammers Sparky who keeps kicking out. He mounts his comeback and looks like he’s cruising to victory when Luna trips him from the outside and the distraction leads to a slingshot headbutt over the ropes and Bigelow advances. 
• This week’s King of the Ring report gives us another big match - a champion vs. champion match between Bret Hart and Diesel. Only Bret’s WWF Championship is on the line but Diesel is very close to being a double champion and being pushed to the moon. In other news, Todd further explains the Lawler/Piper feud. King apparently berated some sick children who just so happened to be friends of Roddy Piper. I don’t think that actually happened but it brought Roddy out of retirement and he’s all about raising money for the sick kids hospital now. That’s lovely.

• Intercontinental Champion Diesel clashes with Mike Moroldo. I like his purple ring gear. He’s demolished by the big man and after forearms, kicks and a bearhug he finishes him off with the Jackknife powerbomb. He’s a monster heel but the fans are really taking to Diesel for some reason. I think he’s just being booked really strong.
• Another Undertaker sighting - this goober saw Undertaker riding on top of a hearse. 

• Jerry “The King” Lawler cuts an in ring promo making fun of Roddy Piper and promising to beat him at the King of the Ring. After a commercial break, Ted Dibiase is in the ring with him, as well as Nikolai Volkoff. Remember how he’s broke? Ted has bought him and he now works for him. He berates the big barrel chested Russian and presents him with a special t-shirt to wear. Ted has dollar signs on his jacket but Nikolai gets to wear the cents symbol on his. He even got him a pair of trunks that say “property of the Million Dollar Man” on them. Vince and Macho do a decent job of hammering home that he needs money to provide for his family, and Dibiase is enjoying humiliating him. Interestingly, as Vince discusses Volkoff’s history as a weight lifter he mentions the USA’s Mark Henry who had been in the news that week breaking some strength records of his own. Mark of course joined the WWF a couple of years later, so we’ll see him eventually. 

• Owen Hart faces Tony Roy. He talks trash about his brother Bret on the walk to the ring and after beating him with the Sharpshooter, puts his shades on Roy and slaps him around, making him a stand-in for Bret himself.

• Duke “The Dumpster” Droese sleeps in the back of his own garbage truck. That seems WILDLY unsafe doesn’t it? I hope they manage to collaborate with Sesame Street and bring Oscar the Grouch in as his sidekick.

• Before the main event, they promote next week’s big match which is Earthquake vs. Owen Hart in a King of the Ring qualifying match. Interesting because this next match is the last we’ll see of Earthquake. 

• With the ring ropes removed, Yoko and Qake make their ways to the ring. The rules are easy enough - throw your opponent out of the ring to win. The two of them circle each other and bump tummies, trying to slowly push each other out of the ring until finally after 6 minutes of effort, Quake steps aside and Yoko tumbles to the floor! Earthquake wins and Macho rushes the ring to raise his arm. Vince excitedly says that next time it’ll be a normal match and we might even get to see them on the Wrestlemania Revenge Tour which they’re pushing ticket sales for but alas, this is the end for Earthquake. I’m not sure exactly what happened as it feels like he’s in line for a big push here but he left the company to go to WCW about a week later. We’ll find out who replaces Earthquake in the King of the Ring qualifier next week. 

Monday Night Raw - May 23rd, 1994

• Raw opens with a recap of Earthquake’s dramatic sumo victory last week and the events of the Wrestlemania Revenge Tour. They have written Earthquake off TV as Yokozuna and Crush beat up and injured him. He’s off to WCW and that leaves Owen Hart with no opponent in his King of the Ring qualifier tonight. Who will it be? I dunno why, but I love Macho’s outfit this week. This colour combo works for me.This week’s episode is actually Live too, which is rare. They mistimed the start of the show and you can hear the end of Howard Finkle hyping up the live audience when the Raw intro ends.

• Owen’s match is up first and he seems very confident despite not knowing who his opponent will be. That doesn’t change when Doink’s music plays. Dink provides distractions allowing Doink to get advantage with a slam on the outside but Owen is more than a match for the two clowns. Double J, who has qualified for the King of the Ring himself and is feuding with Doink, comes out and picks up Dink, threatening to kidnap him. The distraction allows Owen to roll up Doink and defeat him, advancing to the quarter finals. 

• Todd Pettengill brings us the King of the Ring Report, running down the tournament so far. The next qualifying match is on Superstars - the 1-2-3 Kid vs. Adam Bomb and the final one is next week on Raw - Tatanka vs. Jimmy Del Ray. There’s also comments from Big Daddy Cool Diesel who has a chance to become a double champion at the King of the Ring. He accuses Bret of being afraid of him. There’s also been a Tag Team Championship match added to the PPV. Todd wraps up talking about what an angel Roddy Piper is, fighting for “the kids” and donating “a portion” of his earnings to them. Roddy talks about it while practicing with a speed bag in a boxing gym and going on and on about the kids. It’s SO hacky, I’m not impressed by this.

• Duke “The Dumpster” Droese makes his in-ring debut against Barry Horowitz, who has nice new sparkly ring gear. A jobber who makes an effort. Duke carries a trash can and has theme music which features a garbage truck backing up and beeping. The big man slams Barry around and finishes him off with a big spinning elbow drop on the mat. Not an awesome finisher but Hulk Hogan main evented for four decades using a leg drop. 
• After a recap of the Wrestlemania Revenge Tour, including various celebrity appearances which is quite cool for a house show tour, IRS takes on Gary Sabaugh. He’s a big barrel chested guy with a mullet, as was the style at the time. He has the word “Italy” in plain white text across his trunks. Graphic design is his passion, I guess.  IRS is now scheduled to meet Mabel in the King of the Ring quarter finals. He wins this match with no difficulty, of course.

• In the ring, Jerry Lawler interviews Lex Lugar. He was defeated (by count out) in a King of the Ring qualifier by Jeff Jarrett, thanks to a distraction by Crush. King has a good laugh at Lugar’s expense until the man himself finally interrupts. King calls him a cry baby and rubs salt in the wound talking about how unlucky he’s been (at Summerslam and at Wrestlemania). Lex calls out Crush and shows no fear, but when Crush does come out he has his arm in a sling. Vince and Macho Man are confused - they had no idea he was injured. Crush claims that Lex caused it by jumping him from behind. King goads Lex about whether he’d attack an injured man but Lex is fired up and, playing into the whole “no more Mr. Nice Guy” thing, attacks Crush anyway. His arm isn’t injured - he was faking and he and probably Lawler were trying to set up Lex but he didn’t fall for it. Referees hold Crush back as Lugar picks up King’s golden bench and threatens Crush with it.

• Ted Dibiase joins commentary to watch the main event which is his new man servant Nikolai Volkoff vs. a VERY young Matt Hardy! More interestingly is what Dibiase is saying on commentary - he was at a graveyard over the weekend on Superstars trying to bring back The Undertaker. Can his money succeed where Paul Bearer has failed? Vince even mentions that Undertaker’s original debut in 1990 was alongside the Million Dollar Man. Nikolai wins as Ted laughs that dead or alive, EVERYBODY’s got a price!
• Raw concludes with Jerry Lawler hyping up that his guest on next week’s King’s Court will be the WWF Champion Bret Hart.

Monday Night Raw - May 30th, 1994

• Raw opens with Vince energetically narrating all of the King of the Ring qualifiers so far. The 1-2-3 Kid pulled off a miraculous upset over the huge Adam Bomb over the weekend so there’s now only one spot left in the final 8. It was scheduled to be Tatanka vs. Jimmy Del Ray but that’s been changed and it’s now Tatanka vs. Crush. There’s no explanation for why that make has changed but it’s a better one for sure.
• That final King of the Ring qualifier kicks us off tonight. Crush has Mr. Fuji as always so Tatanka evens the odds and brings Chief Jay Strongbow to the ring with him. Vince brings up that if Crush qualifies, he will have to wrestle four times at the PPV and if he wins all four, could become King of the Ring and one half of the WWF Tag Team Champions in one night. When Crush gets in trouble, Mr. Fuji tries to climb into the ring. Chief Jay puts him down with a chop so Crush goes out to get even. Tatanka follows and the pair of them brawl on the outside until the match is ruled a double count out. This means both men should be eliminated, but Vince speculates that President Jack Tunney will step in and come up with something.
• In the King of the Ring Report, Todd goes one further and says we’ll know what’s going to happen with that final slot in the King of the Ring by the end of tonight. Roddy Piper has some comments for King - it’s another low energy promo where he says he’s not a tough guy and doesn’t even want to fight, he just wants to “help the kids” and raise money for “the kids”. I’d rather Roddy fired up and rattled off some of his trademark craziness in these promos but we’re getting a quiet, humble babyface Hot Rod in 1994. Lame. Owen Hart chimes in and says that with Tatanka and Crush coming to a double count out HE should be given a bye to the semi finals. He is technically correct.

• Ted Dibiase is in a funeral parlor and repeats his claim that dead or alive, EVERYBODY’s got a price. He claims he’s been in touch with The Undertaker and he understands the value of a dollar, before laughing like a maniac. 

• The 1-2-3 Kid takes on George South, who I think I’ve mentioned before as looking a little bit like Jake Roberts. I still think he does. The Kid’s grown his mullet out a little and his hair looks better. He picks up the win with a big spinning heel kick (what else?)
• On the King’s Court, Lawler runs down the crowd and calls them repulsive before throwing a bunch of old person jokes at his guest’s parents. He keeps using Jurassic Park as an insult towards Roddy Piper too - that movie was brand new at the time. WWF Champion Bret Hart comes out with pyro and Vince reminds us about Lawler’s attack on Bret last year. They never did finish that feud because of King’s arrest. He reminds Bret of his attack at last year’s PPV as Bret calmly puts down his title belt, preparing for a fight. King gets flustered but then brings out his OTHER guest - Bret’s opponent at this year’s event, Big Daddy Cool and Intercontinental Champion Diesel, along with Shawn Michaels. King calls Bret crazy for accepting Diesel’s challenge but the Hitman won’t back down. He’s full of bravado but that’s knocked out of him when Diesel boots him and plants him with the Jackknife powerbomb! Michaels is all over him with punches and King gleefully joins in with kicks as all three wail on the WWF Champion until the ring fills with referees and officials to stop the attack. Diesel poses with both his and Bret’s title belts before leaving. After the commercial break, Vince shows a slow motion replay of the Jackknife and really hammers home how devastating it is. 

• The Smoking Gunns face a team of jobbers. Bart hoists Austin Steele up, Billy jumps off the top to crash him to the mat - the move is now called the Sidewinder - and that gives them the victory.
• Todd Pettengill drops in to give us President Jack Tunney’s decision on the King of the Ring tournament - next week, Tatanka and Crush will square off again in a Lumberjack match and the winner will take the 8th and final opening in the Quarter finals. 
• In the main event, Jeff Jarrett squashes Chris Hammrick. Macho Man spends the match pointing out that Jarrett has never actually sung on WWF TV and he doesn’t think he even CAN sing. Jeff yells abuse at Macho on commentary too so it still seems like they’re working towards a match between the two. Of note is that in this match, Jeff debuts his more famous and longer lasting finishing move, the Figure Four for a submission victory.

• As has become a bit of a tradition, Jerry Lawler reveals next week’s guest on the King’s Court at the end of the show - he won’t say the name but says he’s from Scotland, wears a dress and a t-shirt which says “Hot Rod” on it.