Raw is War - November 20th, 2000

The Rattlesnake gets Technical

The show opens with a video recapping the closing moments of last night’s Survivor Series PPV and I enjoyed it so much here it is, plus the Raw opening!

In the arena, the show properly opens with the return of Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley (who looks very pretty with her straightened hair) and it's the first time we’ve seen her since before Triple H’s brutal heel turn. She looks upset and speaks of what a miracle it is that her husband Hunter is alive. She is here on her husband’s behalf and shares that he is mostly ok but covered in cuts and bruises and he has now realised that his issues with Austin have gone way too far. She issues a heartfelt apology on both her and Triple H’s behalf and says that they don’t hold a grudge against Stone Cold. It seems that The Game’s near death experience has changed them both. The fans boo her and chant “Austin”. They definitely don’t believe her. Stephanie explains her absence and says she’s been away because she and Triple H are trying for a baby. (That gets more boos and a “slut” chant). She makes Triple H sound like a changed man and asks Stone Cold to come out and accept her apology. Even JR thinks she sounds sincere. Austin does come out and he is having NONE of it. He says the real miracle is that he hasn’t dropped her with a Stunner. He wants to make some apologies of his own. He isn’t sorry for what he did to Triple H - he is sorry that he didn’t scoop the car back up and keep dropping it until “the job was done” and he’s sorry that Triple H is in a hospital and not the morgue. He’s sorry that Stephanie is here and not in a funeral home picking out a casket. Stephanie starts to cry as Austin gets in her face and gives her a message to pass back to Triple H. It’s an emphatic refusal to accept his apology and he flips off the camera! She cries and he barks “shut up!” which pops the crowd and tells her to go and tell Triple H that things aren’t over between them by a long shot! If her apology was sincere then Austin was a total heel here but he’s awesome and I wouldn’t accept the apology either! He’s only apologising because he came up short - he wanted to end Austin first!

Stephanie leaves and then Chris Benoit comes out. He says that Austin has proven how good he is with a forklift but he doesn’t seem to be doing a lot of wrestling since he came back. He says he wants a match tonight and offers to teach Austin how to wrestle (which gets a smirk from the Rattlesnake). Austin says Benoit is the best technical wrestler but he’s the best beer drinker and after an “oh hell yeah” from the crowd, accepts Benoit’s challenge. Outside the arena, a tearful Stephanie gets into a waiting limo and leaves.

Eddie Guerrero gives Benoit a pep talk ahead of the main event, reminding him he’s the best technical wrestler in the WWF. Benoit was the man most responsible last night for trying to lure Austin into Triple H’s trap and has shown zero remorse for that tonight so Stone Cold has plenty of motivation to give him the same kind of beating he gave Rikishi at No Mercy and Triple H at Survivor Series. Before the match, Benoit cuts a promo saying that the fans aren’t going to get Austin 3:16, they’re going to get Benoit 101 School of Wrestling. The match itself is what Austin promised as he forgoes his usual brawls and out-wrestles Benoit, taking this match to the mat and showing off his skills. Stone Cold is most famous for his brawling but people forget that in the mid 90s when he was a lowly WCW midcarder he was the equivalent of an internet favourite with the smart fans admiring his skills and wanting to see him get a big push. His advantage in the wrestling exchanges doesn’t last long and when Benoit gets control Austin reverts to his tried and true brawling and they fight around the outside of the ring. It’s a good match with Benoit getting a near fall off a diving headbutt to the lower back and locking in the Crossface but Stone Cold gets to the ropes. Earl Hebner takes a moment to get the spotlight on himself getting into a shoving match with Benoit for no reason because of course he does. Austin weathers the storm and ensures two German suplexes before hitting a Stunner out of nowhere to win the match and celebrates with beers and it feels just like old times to close Raw. The Rattlesnake rules. 

The Undertaker on the warpath

Michael Cole interviews Earl Hebner who explains the finish to the WWF title match last night for people who were too dumb to get it. Kurt swapped places with a double and Earl refused to count Undertaker’s pin because the man in the ring wasn’t Kurt Angle. That’s fair. I still hate Earl Hebner though.  

WWF Champion Kurt Angle arrives in a glorious white America tracksuit along with his double from last night which helped him retain the title. Kurt proudly says that the curse of the Survivor Series screwjob is over and introduces his brother Eric, who is the best big brother a man could have.

It was Eric’s idea to hide under the ring and celebrate the victory with Kurt but The Undertaker ruined it by pulling him out early. Kurt gets a bit lost in his promo and keeps repeating himself until finally The Undertaker cuts him off. Taker doesn’t speak and just walks down to the ring for a fight. Kurt uses his brother as a human shield and Eric takes a big chokeslam but it’s not enough to save Kurt and Undertaker pummels him with right hands and fights him from the ring up to the top of the entrance ramp. The Undertaker ends it by giving Kurt a chokeslam off the entrance ramp sending Kurt crashing 10 feet through two tables. It looked good but it was clear there was plenty of padding and rubbish to land on and keep the champ safe.

The Undertaker goes to see Commissioner Foley and asks for a handicap match against both Angle brothers tonight. Mick sensibly points out he’ll need to wait and see what shape Kurt is in first. Undertaker also debuts some new patter here, saying he “made Mick famous” by throwing him off the Hell in a Cell at the 1998 King of the Ring (he did) and that he wants to make Kurt and Eric famous tonight. He’d use “I’ll make them famous” as a threat for a while going forward. 

Edge and Christian go to see Commissioner Foley and try to distance themselves from Kurt Angle and ask him to apologise to The Undertaker on their behalf. They even gift him an urn. Mick says that since Kurt and Eric are too hurt to compete it’ll be them who face him in a handicap match tonight. Before the match The Undertaker would find the urn (and a note congratulating him on a “decade of awesomeness”) and throw it in the trash. 

Edge and Christian enter first for their handicap match with The Undertaker who has already taken out the WWF Champion tonight. Edge and Christian look competitive, as you’d hope as one of the most pushed Tag Teams in the company, but it's not enough and Undertaker pins Christian after a Last Ride and then chokeslams Edge for good measure. 

All-Star Tag match
Michael Cole interviews Chris Jericho who says he isn’t done with Kane and that because isn’t mentally stable enough for another singles match he’s in a tag team match tonight with The Rock against Kane and Rikishi. Kevin Kelly interviews The Rock who recaps all the horrific things Rikishi has done to him with sledgehammers and repeated Banzai drops and says that he doesn’t care who wins this match tonight and it’s not about three counts it's about kicking Rikishi’s “big fat candy ass”. He does through out some of his classic casual racism about Asian people mentioning “hing hong ching chong Japan”. Jesus.

Kane teams with Rikishi (who he was feuding with intensely prior to Rikishi’s heel turn in October) against Chris Jericho and The Rock. The Rock doesn’t bother with his entrance and sprints to the ring as soon as his music hits and the fight is on, but breaks down quickly into a tag team match with Kane and Rock as the legal men. Rock is too focused on getting Rikishi and it costs him, allowing Kane to attack from behind and the two big men work him over. JR calls Chris Jericho “Benoit” about 15 times in this match. They are very different looking people, Jim. After hot tags and a lot of back and forth, Jericho cracks Kane with a steel chair behind the referee’s back which allows The Rock to hit a Rock Bottom and win the match for his team. The fight continues as Jericho keeps on at Kane and fights to lock him in a Walls of Jericho as The Rock amazingly manages to turn the huge Rikishi into a sharpshooter too! Referees swarm the ring and break up both submissions, but Jericho then hits a Lionsault on Kane as The Rock plants Rikishi with a Rock Bottom too! The good guys win the match and leave both their huge rivals laid out. 

Other Happenings

• Bull Buchanan and The Goodfather (with Steven Richards who’s still selling his neck from going through a table last night) defend the WWF Tag Team titles against The Dudley Boyz with the stipulation that if Bubba and D-Von don’t win they are no longer allowed to use tables. Bull and Goodfather cut a promo before the match about the chaos and violence of using tables. The Dudleyz bring a table to the ring with them. The Dudleyz overcome some interference from Richards to hit a 3D on Goodfather and have the titles won but Steven attacks D-Von in front of the referee, losing the match for his team with DQ but keeping the titles. The Dudleyz attack him after the match and after a Wazzup headbutt, put him through a table.

• European Champion William Regal has a hardcore rules match tonight with Hardcore Holly and so he hires Test and Albert (who seem confused initially about what he wants even though they’ve been running the APA’s business for over a month now). Crash Holly promises that he’ll have his cousin Hardcore’s back. William’s pre-match promo is about American football isn’t real football (I love this guy) until Hardcore rushes the ring and attacks him. This match is not for the European title. Hardcore Champion Steve Blackman is shown watching from the back. I guess because he loves all things hardcore. They fight through the back with Holly using a trash can and Regal using a leather strap. They fight to the loading bay and T&A jump Hardcore as promised, allowing Regal to snap a 2x4 over Holly’s head and win the match. The beating is about to continue but Crash Holly and Steve Blackman arrive in time to save Hardcore and Test and Albert make a comical getaway in a golf cart. 

• Chyna - who looks a million dollars in a sparkly red dress - joins commentary for the next match which is Ivory defending her Women’s title against Molly Holly. I don’t think Chyna had any designs on joining the women’s division but she is feuding on and off with the Right to Censor. As the women fight on the outside, Trish Stratus runs down to the ring and drops Molly with a DDT on the outside and rolls her into the ring allowing Ivory to pin her and retain her women’s title.

• Tiger Ali Singh and Lo Down arrive at the arena and much like at Survivor Series they’re stopped by security who don’t know who they are and escort them from the premises. This storyline was so dumb. 
• “The One” Billy Gunn teams up with Roaddogg and K-Kwik against Intercontinental Champion Eddie Guerrero, Light Heavyweight Champion Dean Malenko and Perry Saturn (with Terri). Roaddogg gets isolated and worked over and honestly looked a bit out of it in this match. King makes a joke about K-Kwik’s family being thieves which came across very racist. Terri gets in the ring to try and help and Billy military presses her into Perry’s arms before giving him a Fameasser. K-Kwik follows with a 450 splash and wins the match for his team. I’ve made jokes about Roaddogg appearing stoned on TV before he was off his face in this match.

Smackdown! - November 23rd, 2000

Stone Cold is on fire

In the main event, Kane teams with Chris Benoit to take on Chris Jericho and Stone Cold Steve Austin. Austin gets a chance to show off more wrestling ability against Benoit and works over Kane’s leg a little but after tagging out to Jericho, Y2J is cut off and isolated in Benoit and Kane’s corner. They tag in and out and work over Jericho finally Stone Cold has had enough and loses his temper at being held back by the referee and finally drops him with a Stunner followed by Kane and then Benoit. The match ends in a no contest, or technically Kane and Benoit win by disqualification but Smackdown ends with Stone Cold celebrating with beers at the top of the ramp and Jericho giving Kane a Lionsault for good measure. “Stone Cold is out of control” is the story they’re pushing.

The Rock wishes Regal a Happy Thanksgiving

European Champion William Regal heads down to the ring in a lovely well tailored seat and carrying the title belt as only he can. Regal cuts a funny promo about Thanksgiving, lecturing the Yanks on how the pilgrims were kicked out of England and how they’re all fat and watch too much TV. He’s right. He gives them some lessons about manners until finally The Rock interrupts him. He makes fun of Regal, misquoting him and (putting on a bad English accent) saying he’ll “wallop Regal’s candy bum” all over Fort Lauderdale. The European Champion accepts The Rock’s challenge for a match later. I bet you can all guess what The Rock says he’s going to do with the drumstick after their thanksgiving meal later. 

William Regal faces The Rock in a non-title match. The Rock gets the early advantage but when Rikishi comes out onto the stage to watch it distracts him and allows Regal to take over and assault The Rock with suplexes and forearms. The Rock rallies and wins a short match via submission with the sharpshooter and after staring daggers at Rikishi until he leaves, he gives Regal a Rock Bottom for good measure. 

A New Champion

In the opening match, Eddie Guerrero defends the Intercontinental title against “The One” Billy Gunn. Latino Heat looks very confident even though the rest of The Radicals have been banned from ringside. Eddie cuts a pre match promo on “goldilocks” and blames him for the breakdown of his relationship with “cheap-acita.” You cheated on her Eddie. Eddie manages to hit a DDT onto the IC title belt undetected by the referee but “The One” kicks out. Eddie follows up with a Frog Splash and surprisingly Billy kicks out of that one too! Billy hits a one-armed military press which looks awesome and then a Fameasser but amazingly Eddie kicks out of that too. Billy hits his new finisher - the cobra clutch into a slam which he’d eventually christened “The one and only” to win the match and his first (and only) Intercontinental Championship! Eddie would be shown throwing a temper tantrum backstage over losing his title.

Kurt Angle tries to trap the American Badass

WWF Champion Kurt Angle heads down to the ring. He’s wearing a neckbrace after The Undertaker violently chokeslammed him off the stage through two tables on Raw. Kurt says he’s naive as he assumed that after beating Undertaker at Survivor Series that would be an end of the issue. His opponents in the Olympics would normally shake his hand and thank him for the privilege of even facing him but The Undertaker is unsportsmanlike. He gets upset about what Taker did to his brother Eric and says that just because he set HIS brother on fire doesn’t mean no one else loves their brothers.

After talking for a while about this, The Undertaker finally comes out and attacks Kurt but is quickly jumped from behind by Edge and Christian. Kurt isn’t really hurt and shows no ill effects as he joins in the attack but makes the mistake of slapping the American Badass across the face which just wakes him up and riles him up and he fights off all three of them and sends Kurt, Edge and Christian running.

Other Happenings

• Commissioner Mick Foley and Lieutenant Commissioner Debra are dressed like a Pilgrim and a Native American for the backstage Thanksgiving Party. JR shows up with some BBQ chicken as a plug for the WWF’s cookbook (yes, really). There’s a breast and thighs joke with Debra when the chicken arrives. Hilarious. There’s a few of these throughout the show and none of them are funny. The running joke is that Mick keeps making bad jokes. Between that and his constant letching at Debra, these segments accomplish the impossible and make Mick Foley pretty unlikeable. There’s honestly about 12 of them and it all ends with a joke about Debra’s pie and a massive food fight. 

• Crash and Hardcore Holly face Test and Albert in a hardcore tag team match. The action is good with trash cans and fire extinguishers and kendo sticks all in use. Albert crushes Crash with a trash can in the corner and throws him into a Test big boot to give T&A the victory. Hardcore blasts Test with a stop sign after the bell. 
• Molly Holly faces Trish Stratus. Molly pinned Trish at Survivor Series and Trish cost Molly the women’s title on Raw. Trish is still a mostly untrained wrestler but she’d go on to be one of the all time great in ring workers and I’m sure was working hard to get better. Molly was trained by Dean Malenko and is pretty good already. This is ok and Molly wins with a sommersault seated senton off the top rope which looked awesome and she’d eventually call the “Molly-go-round”. 

• Val Venis and Steven Richards head down to the ring. Richards is still limping and selling being in a lot of pain from being continually put through tables by The Dudley Boyz. Val chastises the crowd for being in the arena and cheering on violence and watching perverse programming instead of spending thanksgiving with their families. His opponent is K-Kwik, with his tag partner Roadogg. Kwik has the match won until Bull and Goodfather run down to the ring and attack Roaddogg at ringside. With the referee distracted, Richards hits K-Kwik with his superkick allowing Val to cover and win the match for the RtC. 
• Tazz vs. Raven. This battle of former partners comes off the back of a fall out on Raw two weeks ago leading to Tazz suplexing Raven through a table, and then last week on Smackdown Raven gave Tazz a DDT and cost him a match with Too Cool. Remember when Al Snow was trying to recruit the King to fight these two? That went nowhere. Raven wins a short match with a DDT. 

Raw is War - November 27th, 2000

Foley loses control, and Kurt becomes a marked man

WWF Champion Kurt Angle opens the show and discusses the danger he faces as a WWF Superstar. This is the only profession where you can attack whoever you want, whenever you want and more often get rewarded rather than punished. He mentions The Undertaker chokeslamming him off the stage, Triple H masterminding a hit and run on Stone Cold, Stone Cold dropping The Game from a forklift and even him stunning a referee on Smackdown. He says that he is sick of it and that if anyone else carried on like this in any other sport it would be a national scandal. He says he’s not a sports entertainer, he’s a wrestler first and foremost. This promo would make him a huge babyface these days. He didn’t sign up for all these outside of the ring antics. He’s making his stand now because we’re less than two weeks away from a PPV called Armageddon and if his concerns aren’t taken seriously he’s taking his title and going home. That brings out Commissioner Mick Foley and his Lieutenant Debra. Mick agrees with him and says that they need to control the violence before it gets out of hand. He calls Kurt a hypocrite for decrying all these antics while Stephanie interferes in all his matches and Kurt says that she hasn’t been here for a month and is no longer his business partner. Mick says that there will be a WWF title match at Armageddon, and The Rock will face Rikishi for the number one contendership. He also says Kurt will defend the title tonight against a mystery opponent. It’s also mentioned that Triple H and Stephanie will be here tonight but haven’t arrived yet due to some travel issues.

Backstage Kurt, Edge and Christian discuss who his mystery challenger might be. After speculating about all the people who don’t like Kurt Angle (everyone) Edge and Christian seem sure it’ll be The Undertaker so Kurt says he’ll make sure that isn’t the case.

Kurt Angle goes to see Kane, and tells him that he meant all the things he said about Undertaker on Smackdown and after rubbing a little salt in the wound about family, invites Kane to the Angle house for Christmas. He asks Kane if they can talk and Kane is receptive to it.

Michael Cole talks to Rikishi and about how many people believe Rikishi doesn’t deserve a chance to become number one contender. Rikishi doesn’t care and instead enjoys all the things he’s done to The Rock so far and that tonight he’ll take him out once and for all. 

In the parking lot while Undertaker tunes his motorbike he’s suddenly attacked by Kane who runs him into the metal shutter while referees fight to split them up. Kurt Angle is shown watching with Edge and Christian and this was his plan. Whatever he said to Kane, he seems to have found a way to distract Taker from wanting a title shot tonight.  Later in the show, The Undertaker is shown leaving Commissioner Foley’s makeshift office having demanded a match with Kane tonight.

Kurt Angle heads down to the ring and joins commentary to watch the number one contender battle between Rikishi and The Rock. JR asks Kurt if he knows who his challenger is tonight and Kurt doesn’t but isn’t worried because he always wins. Lillian Garcia is very clear that the winner of this match will face the WWF Champion at Armageddon. These two work in fast forward with The Rock throwing the massive Rikishi around with ease but getting shut down with a superkick to the ribs and then maintaining the advantage by working on Rocky’s injured midsection. The Rock hits a spinebuster and locks Rikishi in the sharpshooter but we’ll never know if that would have ended it as Kurt Angle rushes the ring and attacks The Rock from behind, laying him out with an Olympic Slam.

The Rock wins via disqualification which presumably makes him number one contender officially but it’s hard to call him a winner. Rikishi is furious at having lost the match and slams The Rock after the bell before sitting on his injured chest one more time. I didn’t really notice it until the replay but when The Rock locked in the sharpshooter the referee Tim White had his back to the action not even checking to see if there was a submission.

The Undertaker faces Kane. Taker is still very focused on Kurt and the WWF Championship but Angle’s plan to use Kane as a distraction has worked like a charm tonight. This is a physical match much like all of these two’s battles are. I mentioned at Summerslam (I think) how much of the Attitude era was spent with these two being in each other's business but in fairness this is their first interaction in a couple of months. As Undertaker looks set to chokeslam his younger brother, he’s jumped by Edge, Christian and Kurt Angle. Kurt’s been all over this show tonight! Kane joins in and it’s a four on one beat down with Edge and Chistian holding one arm while Kane holds the other allowing Kurt to hammer the American Badass in the face with right hands. Kurt has attacked Undertaker and The Rock, and cost Rikishi a match via disqualification so far and he still has a WWF title match with a mystery opponent to come. He’s making no friends tonight! 

When Kurt gets to his locker room with Edge and Christian in a good mood they find an angry Commissioner Foley who barks at E and C to leave. Mick gets very angry and calls Kurt a hypocrite with no integrity who doesn’t care about the business he only cares about himself. Kurt says that Mick’s big move was putting a sock on his hand and sarcastically calls him “a fellow athlete”. Kurt says that as WWF Champion he’ll do what he has to do so Mick says that as Commissioner he can do something about it - Edge and Christian are banned from ringside for his title match of they’re all looking at a 90 day suspension and Kurt’s opponent is someone “who might not deserve it because he’s been so out of control lately” but it’s Stone Cold Steve Austin! 

As Kurt Angle makes his way to the ring, The Rock jumps him, Edge and Christian as pay back for earlier with Rocky getting cheap shots in on Angle. Commissioner Foley shows up and angrily kicks The Rock, Edge and Christian out of the building before making Kurt go to the ring for his scheduled main event match. Mick Foley really is losing control, and Kurt Angle is making it harder for him by interfering in so many matches and making so many enemies.

In the main event, Kurt Angle defends the WWF Championship against Stone Cold Steve Austin. This is the first ever singles match between these two and the first Championship match for Austin in over 14 months. This is a huge main event, is what I’m saying. There’s a good bit of time left on the show too so it certainly felt at the time like there might be a title change in the air. The match starts with a smooth wrestling exchange which Kurt gets the best of so with a smile, he gets out of the ring to show off his gold medals. The Rattlesnake is unimpressed and gives him the finger. Austin gets the best of the next wrestling exchange and controls Kurt with a side headlock. It breaks down to brawling in and out of the ring and around the announce area with Kurt resorting to cheating by holding the ropes during submissions to get the advantage. It isn’t enough and Austin won’t be denied as he continues to hammer the champion with punches and running him into the ring steps. Austin hits the Thez press and his mounted punches followed by a big spinebuster. Austin has a near fall as Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley heads down to the ring. She’s no longer Kurt’s business partner so this is a surprise. Austin hits a Stunner and has the title won but the cover is broken up by Triple H who goes right on the assault, pummelling Austin with punches. Kurt Angle tries to join in but Triple H shoves him out of the way so he just leaves. Steph passes a steel chair to her husband which Triple H gives Austin a neckbreaker onto. Earl Hebner spends the whole time getting involved and keeping himself on camera until thankfully The Game punches him out too. Raw ends with Triple H standing tall over the fallen Rattlesnake. 

The Radicals cross Team Xtreme

Backstage, Dean Malenko has Lita cornered and is coming onto her very strongly. He’s been studying her matches (and her body). He hasn’t really had his “ladies man” gimmick since rejoining The Radicals.

As they chat, Chris Benoit opens the door quickly which slams Lita against the door. The Radicals walk off but when they realise Matt and Jeff Hardy have come to check on her, the four of them rush The Hardyz and beat them down four on two leaving them both laid out next to Lita. 

After their run in with The Radicals earlier, The Hardyz will face Perry Saturn, Dean Malenko and Chris Benoit in a six man tag team match. The mystery going in is who will be Matt and Jeff’s partner. King gets very #metoo when he talks about Lita rejecting Dean’s advances earlier. The attitude era being problematic isn’t news but it's still unpleasant to listen to. The Hardyz partner is Chris Jericho! The match is chaotic and after The Hardyz take everyone out with dives to the floor, Jericho locks Malenko (who he knows very well from their long storied rivalry in WCW) in the Walls of Jericho and wins it via submission for his team. The Radicals get the last laugh as they attack Jericho, Matt and Jeff and as Benoit tortures Jericho with a Crossface, Eddie, Perry and Dean take turns hitting moves off the top rope onto Matt and Jeff. 

Other Happenings

• In a six person tag team match, T&A and Trish Stratus face all three Holly cousins. Molly has pinned Trish Stratus twice in the last eight days. The match breaks down and Molly hits an impressive flipping dive off the apron onto Trish while in the ring, Hardcore ducks and Test accidentally kicks his own partner in the face allowing The Hollys to win it! 
• Eddie Gurrerro gets a rematch for the Intercontinental title. It’s kind of cool seeing Billy with the gold thinking back to that four month period where he was obsessed with this title at the start of 1999. It suits him too. This is a really good match with both men having time to shine. Billy gets a near fall off a big tilt a whirl slam and Eddie’s Radical buddies Perry Saturn and Dean Malenko come down and try to help, tripping The One and distracting the referee but Billy battles through and beats Eddie with the same move he pinned him with on Smackdown. Billy gets no time to celebrate as he’s jumped by Chris Benoit who gives the Intercontinental Champion a vicious beating. The other three Radicals join in and Benoit finishes off with a diving headbutt. The odd thing about this segment is that Terri is shown watching on as if she’s some mastermind or leader of this group. She is purely Perry’s arm candy and has served no other purpose. I’ve been pretty clear about how useless I think Terri is since 1998. 

• William Regal is at WWF New York, walking around lecturing people on table manners and pushing some fan’s face down into his BBQ ribs coming up with sauce all over his face. Both the fan and Regal corpse and laugh through it. 
• Val Venis and Steven Richards face Roaddogg and K-Kwik in tag team action. The Right to Censor duo have the Women’s Champion Ivory with them, and if Roaddogg and K-Kwik win this match they’ve been promised a tag team title shot with fellow RtC members Bull and Goodfather. Steven cuts a pre match promo about how they will fight the good fight until we all see things their way. Weirdly Val has swapped out his normal white pants for a black pair so that he now matches the rest of the group. He’s also lost the sleeves off his shirt. K-Kwik wins it for his team with a reverse superplex on Steven Richards, dropping him face first to the mat from the top rope. 
• As Mick Foley is outside getting some fresh air and calming down he’s approached by Tiger Ali Singh and Lo Down who demand competition. He doesn’t give Lo Down the match with The Dudleyz that they wanted, he gives Tiger a Hardcore championship match with Steve Blackman. And makes Chaz and D’Lo Brown wait outside anyway.

• Tiger Ali Singh enters for his Hardcore title match still dressed in a full suit. He doesn’t look prepared to compete at all (this is his first televised match since early 1999 and he hasn’t been missed - he is by all accounts a lovely guy in real life though and was treated terribly by the company.) Tiger refuses to start the match as JR makes a bunch of comments about “the Bombay flu” and implying that Tiger smells of curry. Jesus Christ. Blackman keeps this beating going for an uncomfortable length of time while JR and King continue to make off-color, borderline racist comments. I HATE this. After what felt like an absolute eternity, he pulls off Tiger’s turban (which would be super offensive if it wasn’t for the fact that he isn’t a turban wearer in real life and Vince just made him wear it) and finishes him off with a jumping kendo stick shot. Blackman even celebrates with the turban on. I suspect this was booked in order to humiliate Tiger on screen for some imagined slight he committed backstage at the time.

Smackdown! - November 30th, 2000

Hell on Earth

Smackdown opens with a montage of clips from earlier in the day as Mick Foley promises Rikishi, Triple H, The Undertaker, The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin all one by one that they have a WWF Championship match in their future. Surely that can’t be true for all five of them? After the Smackdown opening signature, King and Michael Cole speculate whether this will be some kind of tournament or a series of singles matches and Kurt Angle goes to see Commissioner Foley himself to find out what is going on and how there can be five number one contenders? Mick promises that all will be revealed later.

Later in the show, Commissioner Mick Foley heads down the ring with a serious look on his face. No one knows exactly what he has planned for the WWF title match at Armageddon, apart from those of us watching this back in the future. It’s not a small announcement. Mick says that after Raw a couple of things have become clear to him - Kurt Angle is a two-faced liar, but he is right about the WWF and how chaotic and violent things have been lately. Sledgehammer attacks and hit and runs with cars, Triple H being dropped from a crane and the WWF Champion being chokeslammed off a stage plus more. He says that the number one contenders match and WWF title match on Raw both ended in disqualifications so there’s no point in booking any more as people will continue to interfere and screw each other so he’s going to give all five of them number one contenders. He starts with The Rock, who comes down to the ring at the mention of his name. The Rock is fired up and feels that he’s the rightful number one contender (he says it much funnier than that). He’s right - he had Rikishi beat on Raw. Mick says that Rocky isn’t the only deserving man and brings out The Undertaker after reminding us all that he had the WWF title won at Survivor Series until he got screwed. He echoes The Rock’s sentiments about not caring who else is involved as long as he gets his WWF title shot. Mick says the next man wasn’t just cheated out of the title on Raw, he was almost cheated out of his entire career - Stone Cold Steve Austin. “If you want Mick Foley to get the bottom line, gimme a hell yeah!”. Mick takes the hint and calls out Rikishi, who smartly doesn’t walk down to the ring and stops at the top of the ramp, followed by Triple H who does the same. Mick doesn’t give us the run down of why those two deserve their title shots (because they don’t) but they’re all involved and keep screwing everyone else over. Mick needed to solve the puzzle and guarantee a winner, no interference and an end to the violence. Mick says that they’re all agreed there would be no physical altercations tonight unless it's in a match. Mick says that all six men will compete for the WWF Championship…inside Hell in a Cell! All five of them seem happy enough with that huge announcement, but that brings out the WWF Champion Kurt Angle who looks furious. Kurt says that Mick has lost his mind and that all he’s done is defend the title with class and honour and has never cheated. What I mostly enjoy about this segment is that while Mick and Kurt speak, we can see Austin, Rock and Taker chatting away in the background. I’d love to know what they were all saying. Triple H says he’s happy with the match, and brings out his wife Stephanie which seems to anger Kurt too. I think this is just the formal acknowledgement that Stephanie is no longer in Kurt’s corner and is back in Triple H’s. Triple H says that no one has to worry about him kicking anyone’s ass tonight because it’s he and Steph’s wedding anniversary so he’ll be celebrating that. He says everyone in the ring is invited - especially Austin who missed the wedding because he was in traction with a broken neck thanks to Triple H and Rikishi. The weird wedding anniversary thing at the end distracted from the point but this announcement of the six man Hell in a Cell WWF Championship match is a big one.

Kurt Angle goes to see Commissioner Foley and protests the Hell in a Cell match and suggests it be a five man match without him where he’ll give the winner a title shot later. Mick says he thought about that but he’s so sick of Kurt’s whining and cheating and being a hypocrite that he’s not changing the match and sarcastically wishes Kurt “a nice day”. Later Kurt would go and see Stephanie and ask her to come back and be in his corner at Armageddon but she’s committed to being by her husband’s side again. Triple H almost walks in on Kurt giving her a long hug. Too long.

Lillian Garcia interviews Kurt Angle, Edge and Christian. E + C talks trash about Mick and calls him jealous and promises Kurt that as the greatest tag team of all time they’ll take out two of his opponents in Hell in a Cell at Armageddon. Tonight’s main event is the three of them against Rock and Undertaker.

Edge, Christian and WWF Champion Kurt Angle face The Rock and The Undertaker in a three on two handicap match. Rock and Taker work well as a team, tagging in and out and focusing their attack on Angle until he’s able to scamper and make a tag to Edge. Kurt continues to dip in and out, flattening Undertaker with impressive suplexes but tagging back out before he can take any punishment himself. He’s worked over until finally after a big swinging DDT on Chistian, he tags in The Rock who rolls through all three opponents and has the match won with a Rock Bottom on Christian. Angle breaks up the cover, so Undertaker goes to chokeslam him through the announce table. Edge blasts him with a steel chair leaving The Rock all alone and an Olympic Slam gets a close near fall. Undertaker recovers and gets back up on the apron and this time he gets the hot tag leaving him in the ring one on one with a panic stricken Kurt Angle. A chokeslam and Last Ride later and Undertaker pinned the WWF Champion to win it for his team. 

Happy Anniversary

Backstage, Triple H and Stephanie set up to celebrate their one year anniversary and The Game asks Harvey Whippleman to stand guard on the door and let him know about any surprises or visitors. Later in the show as they have dinner it is shown how jumpy and paranoid Triple H is as he flips out when Harvey brings them their champagne. He’s obviously expecting Stone Cold. Later, Chris Benoit goes to see The Game and offers to take out Austin as an anniversary gift but Triple H tells him to focus on his own match as Austin will be the one who comes to him. The Rattlesnake is shown watching this conversation transpire elsewhere on a monitor with a smirk. Trish and Test go and visit them - Trish sucks up and congratulates them, while Test is snarky which is fair given his role in the whole thing. Rikishi goes to see The Game and shakes his hand and they have a little “may the best man win” moment.

Jonathan Coachman interviews Stone Cold Steve Austin who says that Triple H is harder to kill than a cockroach but he’ll try again at Armageddon. He says that being WWF Champion is the only reason to be in the WWF at all so his focus is on that now. Coach asks him if he’ll take the bait and attack Triple H to which Austin says he does what he wants, when he wants. Austin would be shown prowling the corridors and presumably planning an attack on Triple H. 

In what feels like the 80th segment showing their anniversary celebrations a man in a Stone Cold cap delivers a cake for their anniversary as Triple H almost hits him with an empty champagne bottle.

The final segment of the show, after the main event, is the pay off to the dozens of Triple H and Stephanie segments all night long. Triple H waits behind the door with a bottle and turns out the lights, telling Steph to go and hide in the bathroom. There’s a loud scuffle when the door opens as Harvey is shown waiting outside the door listening. But so is Stone Cold Steve Austin, with a big smile on his face. He peeks inside and turns on the light to reveal that in his paranoid panic, Triple H has attacked, beaten and bloodied….Vince McMahon! The Rattlesnake outsmarted The Game.

Radical Romance

In the opening match, Matt and Jeff Hardy (with Lita) take on Perry Saturn (with Terri), Dean Malendo and Eddie Guerrero in a two on three handicap match. King makes everyone uncomfortable as he continues to say that Lita deserved to be hit because of rejecting Dean on Raw. Gross. Actually, I misspoke, this is actually a six person match and Lita is officially involved! That doesn’t seem fair, and definitely wasn’t clear until the match began. Lita holds her own and takes out Dean with a top rope hurricanrana as well as taking Matt’s place in Poetry in Motion. Lita hits a moonsault on Dean and has the match won but as Terri distracts the referee, Eddie comes off the top with a frog splash to her back and reverses the pen. Dean pins Lita to win the match for the Radicals. Dean seems genuinely concerned for Lita’s well being after the match.

Tag Title defence 

When Roaddogg and K-Kwik enter and rap their entrance I notice that a lot of Roaddogg’s parts seem to have been edited out. I’d noticed it before and assumed it was an issue with the mics on Raw but this seems intentional. Their opponents are Goodfather and Bull of the Right to Censor and the Tag Team titles are on the line. Steven Richards and Ivory are also at ringside. Steven Richards is ejected from ringside for trying to interfere but Ivory stays at ringside. K-Kwik hits a 450 splash on Bull and has the titles won but Ivory hits him with her WWF Women’s title belt allowing Bull to get the pin and retain the titles. Someone was badly out of position as she did it right in front of the referee Teddy Long but he pretends not to have noticed.

Other Happenings

• European Champion William Regal issues an open challenge for his title, which is accepted by Scotty 2 Hotty. A battle between my two uppermost boys. It’s a good but short match with Regal wins by submission with the Regal stretch.
• Chris Benoit teams with Kane against Intercontinental Champion Billy Gunn and Chris Jericho. Kane and Jericho’s feud has been on the back burner for the past week but they’re still very much focused on each other. Jericho calls his opponents the big red machine and a gap toothed robot. He also calls Kane a hemorrhoid. As Jericho and Kane fight on the outside, Benoit makes Billy submit to the Crippler Crossface.

• Backstage, Tiger Ali Singh and Lo Down (who are now also both wearing turbans) protest Blackman’s treatment of Tiger on Raw and his desecration of his turban - which actually is super offensive - and approach Debra asking for something to be done. Tiger is misogynistic to her so she books them against Blackman and The Dudley Boyz in a six man tables match.
• Tazz, who’s been working as co-host and commentator on Sunday Night Heat lately, interviews Crash and Molly Holly about their match with Val Venis and Ivory on Heat this week. He’s rude to them continually calling them goofy and silly. Molly has a positive, cheerful attitude and looks forward to the work out that Val and Ivory will give them.
• Tiger Ali Singh and the turban-wearing Chaz and D’Lo Brown face Steve Blackman and The Dudleyz in a six man tables match. It breaks down to a proper six man tag and amazingly as Blackman looks ready to put Tiger through a table and win the match, D’Lo manages to come from behind and Sky High the Hardcore champion through the table and win it for Tiger and Lo Down. A big upset. 

• Hardcore Holly faces Raven in a hardcore rules match. This came from their having an altercation overlocker space earlier. Raven jumps Holly from behind during his entrance and cuts a promo about how he’s a bird of prey and sounds like he swallowed a dictionary until Holly gives him a low blow to get the action going. Holly puts Raven in a shopping cart and runs him into a wall and they fight backstage. The brawl takes them out into the street (must have been freezing in late November) and to a bus shop where Holly wins an entertaining brawl after pulling a stop sign off a post and using it as a weapon. This was old school hardcore match fun which the shows are missing out on with Blackman as champion. He’s good but I miss these types of matches from the 1999 golden era of WWF hardcore.

The next Raw takes place right after the UK Exclusive PPV Rebellion on December 2nd, 2000. I have covered that too so pause here to go and read that before picking back up here

Raw is War - December 4th, 2000

Vince tries to cancel the trip to Hell

The show opens with a replay of the end of Smackdown where Stone Cold tricked Triple H into beating his own father-in-law bloody. 

No opening promo this week! We go right into a match with The Undertaker facing one of his Hell in a Cell opponents, Rikishi. This match is physical and Rikishi gets plenty of offence in. They haven’t totally given up on his main event push yet (but they will). A distraction from WWF Champion Kurt Angle leads to Rikishi countering old school into a slam off the top rope. Taker goes take a moment to punch Kurt on the outside, who stays out to cheer on Rikishi. As Undertaker sets up for a chokeslam, Angle grabs a steel chair and distracts Undertaker again and it works as he turns into a superkick and then a 400lbs leg drop but Undertaker kicks out! A superkick and a banzai drop later, Rikishi wins the match and Kurt joins him to give Undertaker a wicked beating afterwards before leaving together. Kurt even wrapped his gold medals around his first to us as a weapon. 

Michael Cole interviews Lieutenant Commissioner Debra about Kurt Angle’s actions and Commissioner Foley’s whereabouts. Mick is stuck in traffic and on his way, but Vince McMahon is here tonight and hyping up a “state of the WWF address” later in the show.

Backstage, Triple H congratulates Rikishi on his victory over Undertaker earlier and asks him to form an alliance with him for Armageddon. Rikishi checks that Triple H is “all good with Vince?” which he says he is, and the two shake hands and agree to work together in Hell in a Cell.

Debra has been out waiting in the parking lot for the arrival of Mick Foley. She encounters Vince McMahon arriving in a limo first, and then finally Mick in his own car. 

Vince goes to see Triple H and asks for some privacy and Rikishi leaves. Vince says that Stephanie isn’t here because he didn’t want her in the middle of this argument. I feel like if Vince had watched Smackdown he’d understand Triple H’s attack was clearly a setup by Austin. He’s making himself look dumb. Triple H explains himself and tells Vince to think about how Stone Cold gets under a man’s skin. Vince tells Triple H to remember last year’s Armageddon (where they beat each other senselessly and Stephanie turned heel on Vince). 

Kevin Kelly interviews The Rock. This is one of his most famous promos of all time as he mocks all the Hell in a Cell opponents, doing impressions of each of them in turn. Here it is in full;

The Undertaker leaves Mick Foley’s office and is angry about not being given whatever he was asking for but Mick promises him he’ll make it up to him on Smackdown. Mick does want to punish Kurt Angle for his actions earlier and books him in a WWF title defence tonight against Chris Jericho.

Kurt Angle goes to see Triple H and Rikishi and asks if he can get in on their alliance for Armageddon, but points out that for that to work they’d need to help him against Chris Jericho tonight. Triple H says they’ll think about it.

Vince McMahon goes to see Stone Cold and asks him to not get inside Hell in a Cell. He doesn’t care about him personally but from a business and investment point of view he doesn’t want his biggest star to risk getting injured. Sensible, and he leaves Austin to think about it.

Vince also goes to visit The Rock and appeals to his intelligence for the same reasons - The Rock is young and has his whole career ahead of him so why should he risk it? Vince doesn’t want his top drawing stars and merch sellers in the Hell in a Cell match risking injury! He goes and sits on Undertaker’s bike in the parking lot and sends someone to go and tell Taker he’s waiting to speak to him too, which leads to Taker going just that. Vince also implores Taker not to be in the match and he responds by spitting chewing tobacco onto his jacket which is disgusting. 

Kurt Angle defends the WWF Championship against Chris Jericho. JR confirms that the winner of this match will defend in Hell in a Cell on Sunday. It’s a very good, back and forth match - these two work really well together every time. Angle ducks a flying forearm which takes out the referee. He hits a Lionsault on Angle and has the match won but with no referee to count. The match continues and Jericho counters an Olympic slam attempt into the Walls of Jericho. A second referee comes down to call the match but he’s stopped by Kane. The distraction allows Kurt to hit an Olympic Slam as the original referee wakes up and counts the three. Kurt Angle retains the WWF Championship. After the match, Kane gets in the ring and plants Jericho with an awesome looking one-armed chokeslam. 

Kurt Angle storms into Triple H and Rikishi’s locker room angry at them for not helping him in the match. Rikishi explains that they didn’t because they saw Kane heading down. Triple H tells him to stay so they can talk alliance. 

Vince McMahon heads down to the ring for the “state of the WWF address” in the main event. He’s made it clear all night that he’s unhappy about the Hell in a Cell match and that he wants the big stars to drop out. This sadly marks the return of Vince McMahon’s full time return as a TV character. I’ve enjoyed the six months he was gone. The McMahon fatigue was real and thanks to Stephanie’s constant presence we never really got a break from it. Vince starts by addressing how strongly he disagrees with Linda having made Mick Commissioner to begin with. He goes on to talk about the mistake of a “sick, twisted mind” putting six top stars in such a brutal barbaric match and risking their careers. That brings Mick Foley down to the ring - Vince calls him “fat ass Foley”.

Mick says that calling him sick and twisted is rich coming from a man who kidnapped his own daughter, knocked out his own son, gave himself WWF title matches and even put Brisco and Patterson in an evening gown match. Mick defends the match - hell in a cell represents two huge moments in his career. His first one made his career and the second one ended it. He says that as long as he’s Commissioner the match is on and maybe careers will be made and maybe they’ll be ended but he stands by it. As Vince gets ready to argue more, Stone Cold Steve Austin’s music hits and after posing on all four corners he drops Vince with a Stone Cold Stunner and leaves with a beer. He passes The Rock on the entrance ramp and after a brief staredown, Rock continues to the ring and drills Vince with a Rock Bottom! He poses for the crowd and also leaves passing The Undertaker on the ramp! The Undertaker rounds out the abuse by drilling Vince McMahon  with an awesome looking Last Ride powerbomb! Vince hit the mat like a pile of bricks. Undertaker leaves and with Vince flat on his back, Mick leans in and taunts Vince a little - he’s taken a Stunner, a Rock Bottom and a Last Rid so there’s only one thing left! Mick pulls out Mr. Socko and puppets for Vince to “kiss my fat ass!”

Backstage moments after the Vince segment, Triple H, Kurt Angle and Rikishi are beating up Undertaker three on one, running him into walls and slamming him into steel. Once Taker is fully subdued, the camera pans back and reveals a bloody Rock and a face down and unconscious Stone Cold as well. They were laying in wait for each of them as they returned from the ring and left all three laying. 

Malenko scores a date

The Hardy Boyz challenge Bull Buchanan and The Goodfather for the WWF Tag Team titles. The Right to Censor duo have Ivory, Steven Richards and Val Venis with them. Before the match, they actually show footage of the finish of this same match from the UK Exclusive Rebellion PPV. Val’s screwy actions is what led to this rematch. The referees eject the RtC from ringside before the match. Of note (or not) is that Bull is wearing sort of off-black jeans instead of black suit pants. They look more dark grey than black. Lita has stayed at ringside and Light Heavyweight Champion Dean Malenko is shown watching her from backstage and literally licking his lips. Gross. The Hardyz have the match won until Bubba Ray and D-Von Dudley come down to the ring dressed as Right to Censor members and distract Matt and Jeff and the referee allowing Bull to hit a scissors kick and retain the tag team titles. Even Bull and Goodfather look confused about why The Dudleyz helped them.

In a series of backstage segments, Dean Malenko goes to present Lita with some flowers. She pretends to be interested before kicking him out of the locker room. Later he goes back and offers her a Light Heavyweight title match, but if she loses she has to go on a date with him on Smackdown. She accepts the match but slaps a box of chocolates back in Malenko’s face before slamming the door.

Dean Malenko defends the Light Heavyweight title against Lita. His prematch prep is putting on aftershave. Lita puts up a good fight and gets a bunch of near falls with roll ups and top rope hurricanranas but honestly it’s hard to focus on this match as my hatred of Jerry Lawler bubbles up. I’ve mentioned his personal political opinions all over this show elsewhere in Other Happenings but he is disgusting during this match, giggling and laughing about Dean groping Lita and finding her refusal to date him shocking. He basically talks about his desires to wrestle Lita next so he can sexually assault her. Jesus Christ. Dean counters a hurricanrana attempt into a stiff powerbomb and locks her in the Texas Cloverleaf to win the match via submission. Dean goes to check on her so she slaps him and leaves - she still isn’t keen, but has a date with him on Smackdown now. Dean also debuted new music for this match. It’s a sort of James Bond instrumental parody to fit his ladies man gimmick and you know what? It’s pretty awesome. 

A Regal Champion

William Regal, who lost his European title to Crash Holly at Rebellion, comes out for his rematch. In his prematch promo he blames Molly Holly for the loss and calls her a tart and a scrubber. Crash looks pretty cool with the European title! It’s funny - he’s remembered for his Hardcore title run, but he’s also been Tag Team Champion and now European Champion. The little guy had quite the career. Crash uses his speed and keeps Regal on the back foot but a counter of a drop kick and a Regal Stretch gives William the submission victory and he is now a two-time European champion. He refuses to break the hold after the match until Molly gets in the ring and hits him with a crossbody off the top rope - Regal rolls through it and gives her a back suplex and locks HER in the Regal Stretch too. That brings her other cousin Hardcore Holly charging to the ring to make the save and throwing the new European Champion out of the ring. Regal - with a smirk - recovers his title belt and leaves with a smug wave to the fans and the Holly family. Molly would be shown loaded onto a stretcher backstage later.

Other Happenings

• In the Commissioner office, Roaddogg and K-Kwik go to see Debra and demand a tag team title match after they got screwed on Smackdown. They’re interrupted by Edge and Christian who point out that they haven’t had a single title match since RtC won the gold. Debra books the two teams against each other later and says the outcome will affect the tag team title situation. 

• Chris Benoit enters for his match with Hardcore Holly, but before the match says that he’ll take the Intercontinental title from “The One” Billy Gunn at Armageddon, which JR confirms is an official match. The match doesn’t go long as Hardcore hits Benoit with a forearm, knocking him out cold seemingly. Holly has a metal plate in his forearm after having his arm broken. Benoit gets a foot on the rope to break the pin and the match continues. Benoit ends up winning with the Crippler Crossface and a submission victory ahead of his IC title match at the PPV.
• Edge and Christian head down to the ring and mock Roaddogg and K-Kwik, performing their own pre-match rap. It’s pretty funny - they’re the whitest men in America. Edge has a few braids in his hair and looks even more silly than usual. Roaddog and K-Kwik are wound up enough to forgo their entrance and just run down to attack and start the match. Edge and Christian are experienced cheaters and win with a chair shot behind the referee’s back.
• King spends much of this show talking about how Al Gore is a loser and needs to concede the recent presidential election. It’s pretty gross how blatant and obvious King and JR make their strong Republican political beliefs especially during a period where the WWF is championing a “non-Partisan” vote campaign. He brings it up in almost every segment, and conflates the Right to Censor with the Democrats (which is hilariously untrue - they parody the Parents Television Council which were a right wing and strongly Republican backed group). 
• Billy Gunn - With Chyna - defends his Intercontinental title against the Right to Censor’s Val Venis (with Ivory). Billy spends much of the match selling his shoulder which Benoit has worked on and injured previously. A Fameasser on Val has victory but Ivory puts his foot on the ropes, and then passes Venis her women’s title belt to use as a weapon. We’ll never know if that would have been enough as Chyna gets sick of the interference and hits Val right in front of the referee causing the disqualification. She then sets about beating up Ivory but she’s refused by Val Venis who clotheslines Chyna up and over the announce desk. Val beats up Billy in the ring, working on his shoulder as Ivory gets all over Chyna choking her and hitting her with her women's title belt while she’s already down and helpless thanks to Val. 

• Mick Foley adds two more matches to Armageddon - Hardcore Holly vs. William Regal for the European title, and Chris Jericho vs. Kane in a Last Man Standing match. 

Smackdown! - December 7th, 2000

Kurt Fires the First Shot

Kurt Angle, Triple H, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley and Rikishi arrive together in a limo very happy with their alliance. A furious Mick Foley is waiting for them and he tells Triple H and Stephanie they have the night off. They protest and Stephanie tries to throw her weight about but Mick yells at them to get back in the limo and leave. But not Kurt - he doesn’t have the night off. He’ll defend the WWF title in a fatal four way tonight against The Rock, The Undertaker and Stone Cold Steve Austin. This is punishment as Mick has asked, begged and pleaded with Kurt to stop interfering in matches but he continually refuses to listen. That’s actually fair enough.

In the arena, Stone Cold Steve Austin arrives. He gives us the serious version of Rock’s promo on Raw as he turns through each man in the Hell in a Cell match and speaks of their credentials. He is ready to bleed and suffer to become the WWF Champion. He makes a good point as at this point there had been so few Cell matches they were very dangerous - Shawn Michaels and Mick Foley are both retired because of them! Kurt Angle comes out to interrupt him and he tries to appeal to Austin to turn his focus and anger towards The Rock instead for making fun of them on Raw. Austin isn’t listening as he gets his cooler of beers from ringside and between taking a drink from them continually throws the half empty beers at Kurt which sends him scurrying and stopping him from speaking. In the end he gives up as Stone Cold walks up the ramp - still throwing beers - and chases the WWF Champion into the back. 

In the main event, Kurt Angle defends the WWF Championship against The Rock, The Undertaker and Stone Cold Steve Austin.

The three challenges make no attempt to fight each other and all three beat Kurt senselessly, taking it in turns to knock him down and throw him around the ring. They don’t tease coming to blows until The Rock goes for a pin which Austin breaks up. Undertaker tries the same and then they come to blows - Rock and Austin work as a team and knock Undertaker out of the ring and then when Austin pins Angle, Rock breaks that up. Angle is thrown to the outside and the two biggest stars in wrestling trade blows in the ring. Undertaker gets back in the mix and this breaks down into a true fatal four way. Undertaker botches a Last Ride attempt on The Rock, collapsing in a heap but fortunately Kurt was nearby and was able to cover and make it look like he clipped Taker’s knee. All four men try for their finishers and keep countering out of it. Triple H and Rikishi arrive through the crowd and attack Undertaker on the outside while Rock and Austin are still focused on Angle. Triple H hits Austin across the back with a chair, and then blasts The Rock in the head. Rikishi sits on Rocky as The Game continues the steel chair assault on both Austin and Undertaker. The match ends via a no contest, and Kurt Angle joins Triple H and Rikishi in the ring to pose and celebrate. Angle hits Rikishi with the WWF title belt so Triple H blasts him with a steel chair too! Triple H is left as the last man standing over all five of his Hell in a Cell opponents.

Unhappy families

Vince McMahon arrives at the arena in his limo and is helped into a motorised wheelchair by Pat Patterson. He’s showing the effects of the beating he took on Raw. 

In a familiar sight, Vince wheels down to the ring in his motor wheelchair flanked by long time stooges Pat Patterson and Gerry Brisco. This is the first time we’ve seen either of them for a long time. Vince gets up out of the chair to enter the ring, walking with a cane and a limp. He starts speaking sadly and softly about how Monday on Raw was to be a celebration and a happy occasion and yet he was mistreated and abused. He gets angry, ranting about how “people like you” should respect people like him. He’s a billionaire and the owner of the WWF and he’s accomplished so many things we should all look up to him. He gets loud boos and “asshole” chants as he rants like a man man, before calming down and going back to sadness. He says he will never be violated like he was on Raw ever again.He says it was only allowed to happen because of Commissioner Mick Foley and he’s blaming him. They’d never dare attack him without Mick’s protection. Which doesn’t make any sense as all three of them have attacked him before multiple times. Vince talks about the danger of Mick Foley forcing all six men into a hell in a cell match and endangering their careers. The point is very much that Vince is saying he's concerned for their safety but really he’s just a classic selfish promotor who’s worried about his products. Mick Foley comes down to the ring and Vince gets riled up and wants to fight - Mick says that he’s retired but if he was going to make an exception for anyone it would be for McMahon. Mick says that he doesn’t care about Vince’s opinion, he cares about the person who gave him the job and brings out Linda McMahon. She backs Mick, but expresses that she’s also worried about the well being of the men in Hell in a Cell. Mick fires up and says that Vince sees them as products and amounts of money but Mick sees men with hearts and souls and desires. He doesn’t want anyone’s career to end but at Hell in a Cell, men are going to get hurt and that’s how all those men want it. Passion and willing to risk it all to become WWF Champion. Mick promises that if anyone becomes seriously injured in the Hell in a Cell match he will resign as Commissioner. Before he leaves, he tells Vince that one day he might kick his ass but until then…have a nice day. Mick leaves but before Linda can, Vince calls her out for embarrassing and supporting Foley over him. He gets emotional talking about how he’s given his life for the fans and his heart for his family. He barks “shut up” at Linda when she tries to speak and screams at her that he wants a divorce. He’s sick of giving! To hell with the fans and to hell with his family - from now on, he’s going to be even more selfish than ever before. 

Kevin Kelly interviews Mick Foley for his thoughts on Vince and Linda earlier. Mick says all he did was make a match - fair enough a very dangerous one - and all it seems to have done is cause problems. He repeats his promise to resign if anyone gets hurt, and also takes a fair bit of the blame for the breakdown of their marriage. Mick seems so sad.

Women’s Division Spotlight

Molly Holly faces Trish Stratus in a number one contenders match. The winner will challenge Ivory for the Women’s title at Armageddon. Trish shows off more ring skill in this match than she has so far and her and Molly exchange suplexes and slams for near falls. Test and Albert come down to ringside to watch up close as Trish hits a hurricanrana for another near fall. Molly hits a Northern Lights suplex but Albert puts Trish’s foot on the rope to break the pin. That brings Crash down with a trash can lid to attack Test and Albert. He’s easily dispatched by the much bigger men, but Trish uses the trash can lid on Molly right in front of the referee. Molly wins via disqualification so I guess that makes her number one contender, but the commentators say that there not being a proper finish means neither of them gets a title shot.

 That’s been pretty consistently the rule for a while. Crash goes to protest to Commissioner Foley later in the show, and Debra solves the problem by giving them both a title shot - triple threat for the Women’s title at Armageddon.

Other Happenings

• Chyna and the Intercontinental Champion Billy Gunn face Val Venis and Women’s Champion Ivory in a mixed tag team match. Michael Cole mentions that Chyna vs. Val Venis has been booked for Armageddon. A distraction by Chris Benoit - Billy’s PPV opponent - lets Ivory hit Chyna with the women’s title belt and allow Val to get the victory. After the match, Benoit locks The One in a Crossface at ringside and continues to stretch and injure his shoulder ahead of their title match.

• Dean Malenko picks up Lita for their date. She is unwilling and not into it but she has put in a lovely dress for him at least. Matt and Jeff want him to watch his behaviour and not try anything funny, and they’re shown getting in a limo to go to a steakhouse. At the steak house Dean continually uses terrible chat up lines and Lita (who in his defence looks unbelievable) keeps knocking him back. Later in the show, Lita has ordered everything on the menu and stuffed her face and finally accepts that she is attracted to Dean. It all pays off with Lita in some amazing looking white lingerie luring Dean to a hotel room where he’s jumped by Matt and Jeff Hardy. She actually does point out that he’s come on this date wearing his wedding ring. What an idiot. He deserves all of this abuse. 

• Celebrity cameo time - Ashton Kutcher who is there to promote “Dude, where’s my car?” sucks up to Edge and Christian. He’s wearing one of their t-shirts. It’s kind of a lame comedy segment as they continually misunderstand the title of the movie and think he really is missing his car and think he’s accusing them of stealing it. Tazz saves the segment by appearing at the end and offering to put Ashton in touch with his guy Joey Numbers who can get him a new car. In another cameo, Susan Sarrandon is in the crowd with her kids! This show took place at Madison Square Garden. Later in the show, The Kat would make her first appearance in a while to gush (no pun intended) over Ashton and ask for a private screening of the movie. 

Ivory, Steven Richards and Val Venis head down to the ring and introduce their two newest members. Bubba Ray and D-Von Dudley helped Bull and Goodfather retain their Tag Team titles on Raw. The Dudleyz come out dressed as fully fledged members of the RtC. D-Von says they have seen the light. Bubba says that they know violence and scantily clad women are wrong. He says that if putting people through tables is wrong….they don’t want to be right! Bubba clocks Richards with a right hand and The Dudleyz lay out Val with a 3D! Ivory makes a run for it as Bubba tells D-Von to get the tables! The Dudleyz have outsmarted the Right to Censor (it’s just a shame they had to cost The Hardyz the tag titles for real on Raw to do it). The fans explode as Bubba drives Richards through a table with a powerbomb off the top rope.

• European Champion William Regal teams with Kane against their respective PPV opponents Hardcore Holly and Chris Jericho. As Kane and Jericho fight on the outside, Holly locks in a tight sleeper on Regal and wins the match either via submission or Regal passing out. The implication is that the metal plate in Holly’s forearm gave him the advantage. Holly just leaves, and Jericho ends his own brawl with a pair of chair shots to Kane on the outside. Regal is down and out on the floor, and Kane is down and out on the outside of the ring.
• Edge and Christian rap before their rematch with Roaddogg and K-Kwik. Big Kendall Roy energy. This time Roaddogg and K-Kwik picked up the victory with a 450 splash on Christian.