Raw is War - November 15th, 1999

Who Dunnit?

Last night at Survivor Series, The Big Show demolished both his own and the entire opposing team in an eight man match and then with a little help from Vince McMahon, won the WWF Championship in the main event. He subbed into the main event to replace Stone Cold Steve Austin who - in the most important news of the night - was run over in the parking lot. They haven’t confirmed the details yet but Austin will be gone for the best part of the next year due to major reconstructive surgery on his neck. Not because of the hit and run. That’s the storyline reason. In reality he’s needed the surgery for about 18 months and put it off until he physically couldn’t anymore. The show opens with D-Generation X - Triple H looks furious after being “screwed” out of the title by Vince McMahon last night. He’s flanked by WWF Tag Team Champions Roaddogg and Mr. Ass, and X-Pac. Triple H gets “asshole” chants before he even speaks. He is very angry - he wasn’t beaten for the WWF title, it was stolen from him. To recap how we got to this point - Shane McMahon was Triple H’s buddy and helped him a lot when he first became champion, but when Shane’s mother Linda tried to bring them back in line Shane listened and Triple H didn’t. He was very nasty to Linda which brought Vince back from exile and after some beatings and back and forth we’re left with the babyface McMahon family against heel D-Generation X. He recaps all the ways Vince has tried to screw him in the past month and calls Vince out to the ring, accusing him of committing a crime over and over. It’s a very serious and angry promo which has the tension killed by X-Pac and Roaddogg goofing around behind him in their bucket hats and with their energy drinks, crotch chopping in slow motion and generally looking like they’re both high (they were). Vince does come out and says DX needs to think about their own crimes. Vince shows the footage of Austin being lured outside by Triple H and then run over last night and he is squarely accusing D-Generation X of being behind it. Vince then brings out all the detectives from Detroit who are here to take DX into custody and question them about the hit and run. 

The detectives interview DX. Roaddogg makes jokes, Billy Gunn explains that he was late to the arena because of travel issues (which is legit) and the more they goof around, the more serious the Detectives get. They are calling the hit and run an attempted vehicular manslaughter. Triple H points the finger at Vince McMahon and refuses to speak anymore until his lawyer arrives.

The detectives question Vince McMahon who explains that while he and Austin have had a ton of issues, they have grown professionally and even somewhat personally close lately. They ask about some of their most famous run-ins and Vince dismisses those. They can account for Vince’s whereabouts but what about his associates, Patterson and Brisco?

Patterson and Brisco are questioned by the detectives who bicker over how much to say, and point the finger back at Vince.

Michael Cole interviews The Rock who accepts Bossman’s challenge for their number one contendership match to be hardcore rules. The detectives approach The Rock and ask if he knew that the car which hit Stone Cold was in his name? The Rock is, and says that he reported that car stolen hours before the PPV. He then makes fun of the detectives with a “it doesn’t matter what your name is!” It was cool to disrespect the police in 1999 and honestly it’s even cooler now in 2023. It would have been funny if they’d arrested him for it though

Backstage after an ad break, Jerry Lawler is talking to the detectives and says he thinks they should question Jim Ross because he didn’t seem concerned enough. JR is obviously upset and furious. When he gets back to ringside he seems unaware we saw that and JR catches him off guard. 

Backstage, X-Pac shouts some rude things at Tori, mostly being quite cavalier about having kicked her in the face last night, which sends Kane chasing after him in a rage. It was a setup and around the corner he’s jumped by Triple H so that he and X-Pac can beat him down with weapons.

Mr. Ass takes on Test in another Vince McMahon sanctioned match. Test attacks quickly and has a clear face guard on. Billy Gunn broke his nose during a brawl on Smackdown last week. Test wins a short back and forth match with a counter into a sunset flip roll up. Mr. Ass jumps Test after the match with a Fameasser like a sore loser and leaves Test down in the ring. It’s not a very nice thing for me to point out but Test has a ton of acne on his back and shoulders which is a sure sign of steroid abuse.

Triple H faces Kane. Before the match begins, Vince McMahon heads out to the ring. He joins commentary to watch first hand. X-Pac jumps Kane during his entrance and then Triple H goes out to join in. Kane does manage to fight both men off and as referees take Pac to the back, Kane and Triple H go down to the ring and start properly. Triple H shoves Vince which brings him into the ring. We then get the odd sight of Vince McMahon and Kane double teaming Triple H. A punch from the owner sends Triple H into a chokeslam from Kane! X-Pac rescues his buddy and officially, Triple H won the match via disqualification. Vince apologises to Kane after the match.

The new Champion gets a new Challenger

The Big Show arrives at the arena. He’s supposed to make his first title defence against European Champion The British Bulldog but he wants The Big Bossman. Vince says that Bossman is already facing The Rock tonight in a hardcore rules, number one contenders match.

The Big Show defends the WWF Championship against European Champion The British Bulldog. He also has the entire Mean Street Posse with him as backup. Considering what a fuss The Bulldog made about getting a title shot a couple of months ago, this doesn’t feel like a big deal. Show quickly and effortlessly finishes Bulldog with a chokeslam. He then plants Pete Gas, Rodney and Joey Abs as well. Four massive chokeslams in about 90 seconds. The Big Show looks dominant (but doesn’t get much of a crowd reaction honestly).

Backstage The Big Bossman preps for his Hardcore match with The Rock and has a length of rope tied in a noose and finds a thick metal chain which he wraps around his fist. The main event is the Hardcore Champion Bossman vs. The Rock in a hardcore rules match for the number one contendership for the WWF title. It feels crazy that in a match with The Rock, Bossman is the favourite here. He is the one that’s actively feuding with new Champion The Big Show afterall. This match is great fun and The Rock takes to the hardcore rules like a duck to water, brawling in and out of the crowd and using JR’s water pitcher as a weapon and delivering a comedy low blow using a broom handle. He repeats his old spot with Mankind too, hitting the ring steps back into Bossman’s face and then hammering them as they lay on top of the Hardcore champion. The Rock steals the referee’s belt and whips Bossman with it, and then delivers a Rock Bottom on the steel ramp but Prince Albert, Bossman’s best buddy, runs in to break up the pin. He and The Rock go back to the ring and Albert throws a couple of chairs into the ring. The Rock ducks a swinging chairshot and Albert knocks down Bossman. Rocky follows up with one of his own and hits the People’s Elbow but again, Albert is there to stop the pin. The Rock fights Albert out of the ring and walks right into a Bossman slam! The Big Bossman wins in a huge upset and is officially the number one contender for the WWF title. Post match, The Rock knocks down Bossman with his own nightstick and then hits Albert in the head with one of the monitors off the announce desk. The Rock has snapped and wraps a chain around his hand, raining right hands on Bossman’s head, busting him open. Referees come down to stop Rocky and he drives the referees and officials with Rock Bottom after Rock Bottom. The Rock then grabs the chain again and busts open Albert! It’s so unlike The Rock to see him this angry and vicious and lose his cool this much but he is clearly very upset to have been screwed out of the number one contendership. The Rock has gotten more revenge on Bossman for costing him this one match than The Big Show has for all the horrific personal things he’s done to him! 

Y2J Snaps!

A dejected and depressed looking Chris Jericho comes to the ring. He failed to win the Intercontinental title last night and had said on Heat that he’d have a sex change if he couldn’t beat Chyna. He’s facing Gangrel tonight who has Luna with him. They were a couple in real life too. Before the match comes, Chyna comes out to remind Jericho that he promised to get a sex change. She has bolt cutters and Miss Kitty is dressed as a nurse. Chyna is showing TONS of personality now that she’s a babyface. Leaving Triple H was the best thing she ever did. Chyna’s taunts work as Gangrel actually wins this match pretty cleanly with a Northern Lights suplex. Chyna and Kitty laugh at Y2J who has gone from depressed to furious. Jim Ross implies that this embarrassment is too much and this might be the last time we see Jericho.

Backstage later in the show, Y2J grabs a camera man and brings him to a dark lockerroom where he has captured Chyna and tied her to a chair! He taunts her and says that she's humiliated and embarrassed by him. This is all a bit of a horror movie! Jericho has snapped. He demands Chyna admit that he was better than her and that he should be the champion. He grabs her by the throat but she refuses to do as he says so he smashes her hand with a hammer, breaking her fingers. It’s pretty horrific as Chyna screams and cries in agony. The commentators are so disgusted that they show a replay of it after the ad break. Chyna on a stretcher with her hand covered in blood. Jericho has smashed her thumb to pieces.

Other Happenings

• Mankind faces Val Venis. These two have been feuding for about two months now and I hope and pray this is the end of it. This was designed to bring Val up to Mick’s level but the whole thing has dragged Mankind down to the midcard. Mick jumps Venis before he can do his opening promo (good) and goes on the attack early. A short back and forth match which Mankind wins clear with a Socko assisted Mandible Claw. At this point his autobiography was number 2 on the New York Time’s Best Seller list. He was flying high.

• Roaddogg faces Al Snow. The commentary focuses mostly on the outrage of Snow’s action figures being pulled over “the severed head” and his friendship with Mankind. The match was supposed to be punishment for Roaddogg but he wins clean as a whistle with the pump handle slam. Mankind comes out to cheer up the depressed Al Snow and sings “for he’s a jolly good fellow” and says that he’s going to take Snow on a vacation to Las Vegas.

• Luna gives Test and Stephanie McMahon an engagement present. It’s a taxidermied squirrel, because she heard Stephanie likes stuffed animals. They both hate it but are very polite to Luna. They get married in two weeks live on Raw! 
• The Godfather faces the newly debuted Kurt Angle! He has his real life Olympic medals and Godfather offers him hoes in exchange for them. Kurt says that he’s here to wrestle. They are making a big deal about the fact that the people are booing him. How can they boo an Olympic hero? Much like last night, he gets on the mic midmatch to question this crowd. “What is wrong with you people? How dare you cheer a pimp over me?”. The match ends when “a fan” jumps into the ring with a sign that says “World Wide Filth” and Godfather tears up the sign. The distraction lets Kurt hit the Olympic Slam and win the match.

• Dave Hebner goes to find Bradshaw and Faarooq and breaks the news that some guys they had a rumble with in a bad in Detroit have come to the arena looking for them. They head out into the parking lot and four big guys are waiting for The Acolytes. They show no fear and attack and beat all four of them senseless. After the break, Bradshaw and Faarooq find them again getting medical attention and beat them up again.

Smackdown! - November 18th, 1999

DX targets The McMahons

The show opens “in progress” as DX brutally assaults Patterson and Brisco in a locker room. Triple H tells a bloody Pat Patterson to tell Vince McMahon that he’s making this “too personal”. After the Smackdown intro, Sgt. Slaughter meets Vince in the parking lot to tell him what happened and Vince, Shane and Stephanie McMahon along with Test run from the limo and follow him through the back to find out what happened to his stooges. Vince is furious and concerned about his long time associates. Brisco does his best to deliver Triple H’s message but is a hilariously poor actor. Vince fires up and demands to see Triple H right now.

After refusing to go and see Vince and making Sgt Slaughter run back and forth, Vince goes to see DX. He kicks Triple H’s feet off a chair and taunts him about no longer being WWF Champion. He mocks DX for showing their toughness by beating up two old men and warns him that it stops tonight. No more. Vince refuses to back down and so does Triple H.

Backstage, Test is too busy playing WWF Wrestlemania 2000 for the N64 to look at wedding gifts with Stephane McMahon. That game was promoted a bunch on TV this month. I’ll add it to the video game section. He Test seems to be playing as himself against Triple H and then as Stone Cold. Stephanie gets a card that says a gift is waiting out in the limo and Test volunteers go and get it for her because it’s cold outside. He heads out to the limo in the parking lot and is jumped by DX. X-Pac hits him with a trash can and the four of them run him into the door and then into the side of a car before stuffing him into the trunk of a waiting car which Mr. Ass drives off in. Roaddogg sings “happy anniversary” which makes less than no sense as they aren’t married at all yet. I’m sure he was very high. His promos have shifted firmly into the “I love weed” territory. 

Backstage Vince McMahon furiously tells DX he’s calling the cops after their abduction of Test. Stephanie McMahon charges Triple H with slaps and is subdued by Vince.

In the parking lot, the McMahon’s recover Test who seemingly has had his nose rebroken by DX.

Triple H approaches the McMahon locker room and offers an insincere apology about Test’s nose before giving a hockey mask as a wedding gift. Vince slams the door in his face. In another segment minutes later, Vince positions some security guards at the door.

As the McMahons hang out in their locker room (and it's nice to see Shane and Test be best friends after their wars over the summer) they can all smell smoke. After the commercial, they crawl out of the room amid a huge amount of smoke. There was seemingly a fire in their office. 

Triple H heads out into the arena and despite having had zero interaction since before No Mercy, his titantron video still has a ton of Chyna footage in it. As he makes his way to the ring, a coughing McMahon family blame DX and Triple H for the fire. Vince tells the security guards to take his family out to the limo so he can handle some business but Test and Shane want Vince to keep the security, which he does. Triple H says this all started as business. He busted his ass to become WWF Champion. He says that Vince is the one who made this personal. The fans chant “asshole” at him. He says that he wasn’t one of “Vince’s boys” and it pissed him off that Triple H became champion anyway. He’s oversimplifying the issue but yeah, I guess. The fans start loudly chanting “Austin” which is pretty sad in hindsight. He’s gone folks. He calls Vince out to the ring so that he can get personal with him, but tells him to leave the police and security in the ring. Vince does come down and takes his jacket off, ready for a fight. Triple H says that if he touches him he’ll sue. Triple H says that he’d beat Vince half to death and get fired so instead, he wants Vince to go to his lawyers and have them draw up a contract for them to fight each other in a match. An official match where they can get as personal as possible with each other. He promises to beat Vince to the end of his life at Armageddon. Before Vince can formally accept, the titantron shows Test, Shane and Stephanie laying in pain at the bottom of a stairwell in the back. The show ends with Vince running back to check on them as Triple H gloats and taunts him

The Big Bossman goes Hardcore on the WWF Champion

Hardcore Holly accompanied by Crash Holly faces the WWF Champion The Big Show in a title match. Crash jumps into the ring and tries to help his cousin but its so ineffective the referee doesn’t even disqualify them. Show easily dominates both men and finishes Hardcore with an awesome looking chokeslam to retain the WWF title. In a funny spot, Crash tries to break up the pin but his blows don’t even phase Show and he doesn’t react. He does plant him with his own chokeslam but is then jumped by the new number one contender, The Big Bossman. He assaults Big Show from behind with his nightstick, seemingly knocking him out and then running off before the champion recovers. 

Hardcore Champion and number one contender The Big Bossman faces The Rock. He has Prince Albert with him too and this rematch was requested after Raw where The Rock completely lost his cool and destroyed Bossman and Albert with a chain and a steel chair after being screwed out of a shot at the WWF title. Earlier tonight The Rock was asked about it and he promised that whether he’s the number one contender now or not, he will be WWF Champion again soon. Both Bossman and Albert have big plasters on their heads after The Rock busted them both open with a chain on Raw. The Rock pretty easily gets his win back and finishes Bossman with a Rock Bottom for the three count. He’s jumped by Albert and the two beat down the People’s Champion until WWF Champion The Big Show makes the save! Bossman runs away but Albert takes a massive chokeslam. Hardcore and Crash Holly try to attack The Big Show too but they’re easily fought off by The Rock while The Big Show chases after Bossman. 

Your Olympic Hero

Kurt Angle takes on Gangrel, along with his new on screen girlfriend Luna. Gangrel beat Chris Jericho on Raw. The same guy who had the “World Wide Filth” sign during Angle’s match with Godfather on Raw is back in the crowd. I’ve no idea who it is - it's a heavyset guy with male pattern baldness and his sign says “WWF is Immoral ''. I’m pretty sure this story doesn’t go anywhere. Kurt once again pauses midmatch to chastise the fans for not cheering him, mocking Gangrel and Luna. He has tons of personality and talks like a man that’s been cutting promos for years. Kurt shows off an array of different suplexes and the more he poses and demands cheers, the more the fans boo him. Kurt wins in dominant fashion with the Olympic Slam and celebrates like he just won the World title. It’s not a shock Kurt Angle is great, but it is surprising he is this good in only his third appearance. 

Other Happenings

• Edge and Christian take on the Too Cool team of Grandmaster Sexay and Scotty 2 Hotty. I’ve mentioned it before but Scotty is one of my boys. Scott Taylor is a great wrestler. Too Cool cut a very uncool “white bois speak ebonics” promo before the match. It is hilarious. Edge and Christian break and laugh. This is a good but short match between four athletic young guys and Too Cool picks up what I think was an upset victory with a top rope leg drop on Christian. 
• The Godfather along with three hoes challenges The British Bulldog for the European Championship. Bulldog looks pretty spacey when he comes out. His eyes are glazed over. The same “WWF is Immoral” protester from the crowd earlier gets in Godfather’s face again and the distraction lets The Mean Street Posse jump him and The Bulldog wins.
• Viscera makes a pass at Tori while talking about how he’s a real man and making a joke about Kane’s apparently damaged manhood (which is what X-Pac has claimed). That leads to a match later in the show where Kane faces the 500lbs Viscera. Tori stands and watches from the top of the ramp but does head down to the ring when Kane is in trouble on the outside. Viscera approaches her which fires up Kane (no pun intended) and after a flying clothesline off the top rope, he (kind of) chokeslams the 500lb man to win the match while Tori cheers on her man.
• JR is backstage on the phone, apparently to the detective being questioned about Stone Cold’s hit and run. He calls Jerry Lawler, who is the one that threw him under the bus, an ass. He really is - I hate Jerry Lawler in character and out. But to each their own.
• Ivory defends the WWF Women’s Championship in a triple threat, hardcore rules match against Jacqueline and Luna. The three women work really hard to make this something good and use weapons at ringside before fighting through the crowd and into the women’s dressing room. Luna smashes a glass jar over Ivory’s head and she and Jackie fight back out into the hallway. Ivory rejoins the frey as they reach the concession stands and have a rowdy crowd there in person to watch while they use popcorn and soda as weapons. The match continues into the men’s room while two guys are standing using the urinals! The match finally ends with a shot from a baking tray in the kitchens behind concessions to Jackie and Ivory retains her women’s title. This was messy but a lot of fun.

• Mick Foley takes Al Snow to Las Vegas “to cheer him up” but in reality it was part of UPN’s “Vegas invasion weekend” whatever that is. It was to promote stuff tho, basically. It is good fun though and they go to a casino and on roller coasters and the like. I love Las Vegas. A random fan follows them around doing impressions of The Rock. Two guys take Snow and Foley to a strip club and later, Mick is tipping the girls with quarters. 

• After a full recap of his terrible actions on Raw, smashing Chyna’s thumb with a hammer, Chris Jericho is called out by Mark Henry (who he calls Mike Henry) as Sexual Chocolate has “a history with Chyna” and doesn’t like a man who beats women. Jericho makes jokes about manicures and hitchhiking. Chyna apparently needs reconstructive surgery on her hand, but isn’t pressing charges. Y2J wins a very short match super clearly with a springboard moonsault off the middle rope (which would eventually be known as the Lionsault and is one of his finishing moves). 
• Bubba Ray and D-Von Dudley are seemingly questioned by the police about Stone Cold’s hit and run on a pay phone. Bubba stutters that he doesn’t even know how to drive.
• The New Age Outlaws defend the WWF tag team titles against Matt and Jeff Hardy (with Terri Runnels, who is still a pretty useless addition to this package). The referee goes down and Matt and Jeff pour on the double team moves, hammering Billy and Roaddogg with a neck breaker and Swanton Bomb, and then a tandem leg drop/splash. They clearly have the titles won until X-Pac runs in with a cheap shot on Matt Hardy and then fights with Jeff on the outside. An X-Factor behind the referee’s back legs The Outlaws retain the titles. Terri looks like she literally couldn't care less that her guys lost which i don’t think is part of the storyline and she’s just not a very good performer.

Raw is War - November 22nd, 1999

Vince McMahon makes it Personal

In the McMahon camp, Shane rallies the troops. No one knows where Vince is and are all worried that he’s going to go too far and escalate things tonight so he, Test, Patterson, Brisco and some more officials set out to find him. The whole entourage would run around the arena looking for him in a couple of different segments.

D-Generation X are on the way to the arena in a limo (with a cameraman inside) and Triple H takes a phone call from someone who tells them Vince has flipped his lid and they laugh about him. They recap all the horrible things they’ve done including admitting to having set the fire on Smackdown. In the parking lot, Shane and Test finally find Vince sitting in a parked car and holding a baseball bat. He says he just needs some fresh air and tells them to go and get ready for their tag team title match against The New Age Outlaws later. 

DX’s limo arrives at the arena and Vince McMahon drives into it full speed, reversing and crashing into it over and over while screaming like a mad man.

“Lets play the game! Lets play a game!” Vince gets out and smashes all the limo’s windows with his baseball bat while DX escapes. This was an awesome little segment and Vince’s hysterical screaming made me laugh. Vince is even angrier at Triple H than he ever was at Stone Cold. To be fair, Austin never attacked Vince’s wife, son and daughter. In the arena after an ad break, Vince is hammering on the DX locker room door with the ball bat while Shane and co try to talk him down. In the next segment, police officers arrive at the arena and place Vince under arrest, cuffing him and leading him away but not before DX comes out of the locker room to taunt him and the rest of the McMahon’s. Triple H hangs at the back and assaults Vince, getting some punches in on a handcuffed Vince McMahon. What a coward. My adrenaline kicked in watching this and I got pretty riled up during this whole arrest sequence. I wanted Vince to murder Triple H with his bare hands! The cameras would stay with Vince and show him arriving at the station and being booked.

Shane McMahon gets a phone call from Vince in jail and says the lawyers are on the name (name dropping real life WWF head legal council Jerry McDevitt) and says hes happy to deliver Vince’s message. 

Triple H comes out to the ring and shows the footage of Vince’s attack earlier and confirms that he was the one who called the cops (well, duh). He steals Vince’s joke from Smackdown about going to jail and learning what “doggy style” is all about. He reiterates his challenge to Vince for an anything goes, unsanctioned fight at Armageddon. Shane McMahon comes out and accepts on Vince’s behalf and then says Triple H will face both Acolytes in a handicap match tonight. Triple H challenges Shane to come fight him like a man but he’s then jumped by the rest of DX. Test, Patterson and Brisco come down to try and help and it’s four on four, but then they’re followed by The Hardys, and then The Acolytes and the eight men clear DX out of the ring. During the melee, Billy Gunn seems to have badly hurt his leg and is helped to the back by his DX-mates. After the commercial break he is being tended to by the trainers. The New Age Outlaws are scheduled to defend the titles later against Test and Shane. 

After another shot of Vince McMahon in jail - this one of him being locked in his cell - the Roaddogg enters for what is supposed to be a tag team title match. Mr. Ass is apparently hurt. Lillian Garcia announces Test as Roaddogg’s opponent and this would seem to now be a singles match, and it’s confirmed when Shane McMahon jogs to the ring in a referee shirt. Shane doesn’t really get involved but Roaddogg still punches him. It’s enough distraction for Test to hit the pumphandle slam and win the match. Shane definitely wasn’t a fair referee and it really does feel like theres a lot of build for Shane and Test challenging for the tag team titles.

Pat Patterson and Gerry Brisco taunt Triple H as he makes his way to the ring for his handicap match. The Acolytes debut their new theme song - the one they’d keep for the rest of their time together - and DX has been banned from ringside for this match! The two big tough men hammer and double team and brutalise Triple H. They fight around the ring and on the announce table and Triple H makes the mistake of leading the fight up the ramp where he is bodyslammed on the steel. Bradshaw pulverises Triple H in the crowd and he is totally overwhelmed by the former tag team champions. Faarooq hits him with the ring steps and Triple H is being beaten from pillar to post. Triple H hits the referee but there's no disqualifications. Bradshaw knocks out another referee so there's no one to stop them from hurting Triple H. A stiff double powerbomb would end it but they aren’t done hurting him. It backfires as Triple H ducks a clothesline from hell which hits Faarooq, and then he hits him with a chair and tries to escape. A weak and staggering Triple H gets to the top of the ramp where Vince McMahon - who was released on bail - hits him in the back with a steel chair and then throws him off the entrance ramp sending Triple H crashing through tables and cables! 

Rock n’ Sock rides again

In the arena, the show opens up with Mankind (in a blue shirt instead of white which looks really odd to me) and Al Snow in tag team action against Hardcore and Crash Holly. Hardcore has Al Snow’s action figure with him. It was pulled off shelves totally unfairly due to containing “a severed head” but it also was a double pack along with Hardcore Holly so it affected his own sales. Snow has had enough of his taunts and runs out to start this match. In somewhat of an upset, The Holly Cousins win when Crash pins Snow. Mankind hits them both with a chair after the match. 

Backstage, Michael Cole tries to interview The Rock. The Rock is facing The Big Bossman and Prince Albert later with a “mystery” partner. As he walks he bumps into Mankind and Al Snow. He takes a moment to tell Mankind that he did NOT throw his book in the trash and mentions something from chapter 37, revealing that he has read it. This seems to be the first time they’ve crossed paths since their fall out last month. The Rock doesn’t know who Al Snow is, and Mick even laughs at his former partner’s mockery of his new partner. Mankind seems quite pleased to have learned that yes, The Rock DID read his book.

Hardcore Champion The Big Bossman and Prince Albert enter first for a tag team match. Bossman talks about having beat The Rock and becoming number one contender. We don’t know who his partner will be as The Rock enters. He says he doesn’t want or need a partner and tries to go it alone. As The Rock is dominated by two men, there's a shot of Mankind and Al Snow watching backstage on a monitor. With Rocky in trouble, Mick Foley comes down to the ring and hops on the apron and The Rock does tag him in! The Rock n’ Sock Connection ride again! As Mankind has the Mandible Claw on Bossman, The Rock plants Albert with a Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow combo and even lets Mankind cover and win the match. The Rock and Mankind share a knowing look after the match. The Rock does like him, after all.

Angle on a winning streak

Kurt Angle comes out for a match and continues to try and get the fans to cheer for a gold medalist, shaking hands with fans and all the ringside staff before getting into the ring. He leaves his medals with JR and King for them to examine and talk about. His opponent is Mark Henry who was also an Olympian in 1996 on the weight lifting team. Kurt brings this up before the match and lectures Henry for being too focused on women and partying and that's why he did badly in the Olympics and Kurt won gold. The fans are already starting to get into Kurt and there's a lot of signs. He asks that the fans cheer him for bringing home the gold, and not for Mark who stayed out all night at a topless bar the night before he competed and came in 18th. The fans cheer, which just makes Kurt angrier. He lectures Mark on his three Is - Intensity, Integrity and Intelligence. Mark has finally had enough and attacks Kurt and throws him around with power moves but Kurt wins a short match with a Northern Lights suplex and celebrates like he won gold again.

Other Happenings

• The Godfather along with six hoes takes on Chris Jericho. Jericho calls Godfather a piece of crap before the match. On the outside, Jericho uses one of the hoes as a human shield and uses it to jump on The Godfather. The women attack Y2J and pull his hair and slap at him but in the ring, Jericho uses a bulldog and then the springboard moonsault off the middle rope to win again. The fans are cheering him more and more despite his horrible heel actions against Chyna and it seems like management have noticed as he continues to win matches fair and square. 
• Edge and Christian take on Bubba Ray and D-Von, The Dudley Boyz. This is a great little tag match which Edge and Christian win with a double stacked superplex on D-Von after a nice counter-counter-counter sequence. 
• Stephanie McMahon and Test’s wedding is next week on Raw and after a nice flowery video wedding invite (thanks guys, I’d love to attend) there’s footage of the bachelorette party (or hen do if you’re British) where Moolah and Mae Young give her lingerie and sex toys to Linda’s general amusement and disgust. In the second of these segments, Moolah tells of Mae for drinking too much, and then Linda reveals her present is a flight to Las Vegas for everyone to continue the party there.

• Jeff Hardy is in singles action and has his brother Matt and (the utterly useless) Terri Runnels with him. She honestly barely acknowledges the team and is there to dance and flash the crowd. Jeff is facing X-Pac who cost The Hardys the tag team titles on Smackdown. Terri distracts the referee and after a Bronco Buster, Matt Hardy gives X-Pac a neck breaker. Roaddogg and Billy Gunn run in to make the save and X-Pac picks up the win. The three DX members then beat down Matt and Jeff after the match and even threaten Terri. 
• WWF Champion The Big Show has issued an open challenge for anyone to have a title match tonight. It’s accepted by Kane! The match goes for a few minutes until Viscera comes out onto the stage and accosts Kane’s girlfriend Tori. Kane goes to fight Viscera which ends the match via disqualification, and then Big Show demonstrates his power with an awesome huge bodyslam on the 500lbs Viscera.

• During the Too Cool tag team match, Jim Ross reads a pre-written statement responding to the coordinated attempts by the PTC to get WWF’s advertisers to abandon the company. It was all pretty rubbish stuff as these right wing Christian pundits lecturer people on what they or their own kids should watch. Mick Foley dedicated a huge chunk of his second book to talking about it.
• Val Venis teams up with European Champion The British Bulldog against Too Cool. Val Venis ends up abandoning his partner and then The Mean Street Posse rush down to defend their man, The Bulldog. The debuting Rikishi runs down to the ring - a huge Samoan dressed like a sumo wrestler - and lays out all three Posse members. Before he can leave, Too Cool encourages him to dance with them and he does! And just like that, a super popular babyface act is born. The fans cheer pretty loudly for Rikishi’s dancing! 

Smackdown! - November 25th, 1999

Happy Thanksgiving?

D-Generation X are awaiting the arrival of Vince McMahon in the loading bay. They have some guy in a suit with them, ready to serve some legal papers to Vince McMahon. Triple H is selling his ribs after being thrown off the stage on Monday. When Vince and Shane arrive, Triple H issues Vince with a restraining order! He can’t come within 50 feet of him. Vince is furious and mocks how tough Triple H is. I mean even Vince never got a restraining order against Austin!

Backstage as he still seeths about the restraining order, Vince books The New Age Outlaws to defend the tag titles against The Hardyz in a steel cage! He adds Triple H and X-Pac against Shane McMahon and Test! 

Triple H leads the rest of DX outside to learn about being thankful and it turns into some lame comedy making fun of the city they’re in. They spot a couple of homeless guys nearby and bring them into the arena to join in on the big backstage thanksgiving party. In a couple of these skits they basically went around finding as many homeless people as possible to bring to the party. During one of these Triple H tells a homeless man “you can’t work, you’re as bad as Jericho”. That would just be a little joke if not for all of Y2J’s stories in his autobiography about Triple H and Chyna taking a dislike to him and working hard to make sure he lost his push and all favour with management. 

Backstage DX have lined up an entire table of homeless people but don’t let them touch any of the food and taunt them all with it instead. I really don’t see the point of any of this as it’s not funny and just feels really awkward. They eventually kick them all out after teasing them with a hot meal. It’s hardly the behaviour of a main event heel. Later in the show, the homeless people would get a hot meal and Michael Cole excitedly says it was Vince McMahon who arranged that. 

The New Age Outlaws defend the Tag Team titles against Matt and Jeff Hardy inside a steel cage. The match is wild and fast and Matt Hardy hits an amazing moonsault from the top of the cage which wipes out Roaddogg, Jeff and the referee. Billy Gunn backdrops a charging Jeff up and over the top of the cage which apparently means that The Hardys have won the match but there's no referee to ring the bell. We should have new tag team champions but X-Pac is there to throw Jeff back into the ring just as the referee recovers. He stops Matt Hardy from climbing out too and The Outlaws win when Mr. Ass escapes.

In the main event Triple H and X-Pac vs. Shane McMahon and Test. Shane is obviously the weak link on his team and gets worked over. The Outlaws do run down to get involved and The Hardyz are there to help out the McMahons. It doesn’t matter and X-Pac wins clean with an X-Factor on Test. DX continues a four person beating on Shane for what feels like a long time until Vince McMahon comes out onto the ramp. He has the restraining order so he can’t go to help so he’s forced to watch as Shane is given a Bronco Buster and a Pedigree. Vince returns with back up and sends Edge, Christian, Kane, Hardcore and Crash Holly, Prince Albert, D’Lo Brown, Val Venis, The Dudley Boyz and more to the ring. The entire WWF locker room empties and rushes the ring and beats on DX, but that quickly turns out into an all out everyone man for themselves war and yes, a food fight with the pies and tables of thanksgiving food that are positioned at ringside. 

Rock n’ Sock are back in the title hunt

Backstage Mankind tries to cheer up Al Snow. Snow is down in the dumps about so many things at the moment but he is very upset that Mick has reformed The Rock n’ Sock Connection. He says he hates The Rock.

Mankind enters first for a pretty big tag team match - it's the reunited Rock N’ Sock Connection taking on The Holly Cousins for the number one contendership for the tag team titles. Mankind seems to have forgiven The Rock after learning that he did read his book. He seems to believe that it wasn’t The Rock who binned the book too. The Rock takes note of all the tables of thanksgiving food that have been set up around the ring and does some comedy about pies. He tastes the poontang pie (its labelled) and then says that Michael Cole has never sampled poontang pie and makes some thinly veiled virgin jokes before making Cole try the pie (it's basically just a cream pie) and ends it all with a big “it doesn’t matter” punchline. The Rock and Mankind win with a Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow but the story feels a little incomplete. The Rock didn’t even really acknowledge Mankind out at the ring. Al Snow didn’t look happy to have lost his tag team partner back to The Rock though.

The women’s division takes two steps back

WWF Women’s Champion Ivory goes against Jackie in a “gravy bowl” match. Basically the girls all wrestle in a big pool of brown water. Miss Kitty is the referee wearing a zebra strike bikini top and booty shorts. Neither Ivory nor Jacqueline look very happy to be in this match - they honestly look pretty disgusted to be stepping into the pool. This is a non-title match and Jackie wins with what was basically an X-Factor in the gravy. After the match, Ivory attacks Miss Kitty like a sore loser. Miss Kitty seems to be choking and she has to get the heimlich manoeuvre from the busty female EMT. Ivory then tears her blouse off and pulls her into the gravy too. This all might be worse than anything Vince Russo did with the girls.

Other Happenings

• There's a video package with everything leading us to Test and Stephanie McMahon's wedding on the next episode of Raw. The build up is important because the payoff is wonderful.

• Jim Ross in the ring brings out the WWF Champion The Big Show for an in ring interview. He asks him generic questions about how it feels to be WWF Champion and to be fair, Show puts the title over big. It’s crazy that he only debuted 9 months ago. Before he can say much more, he’s interrupted by Chris Jericho. Y2J says that he will be The Big Show’s new daddy. He calls Show boring and that his size doesn’t mean anything. Jericho puts up a good fight but when The Big Bossman comes to ringside, Show sees red and chases his next challenger and the two fight away from the ring. Intercontinental Champion Chyna comes down to the ring - with her hand heavily bandaged - and as a cocky Jericho challenges her to a fight, she knocks him out cold with a hammer! She leaves The Big Show comes back to the ring and spikes Y2J with an awesome looking chokeslam and covers to officially win the match and retain the WWF title. I guess this was no disqualification. 

• Kurt Angle takes on D’Lo Brown. In a massive show of confidence for him so early into his career, Kurt Angle cuts a pre-match promo about Thanksgiving and his three Is and draws some “asshole” chants. This match is probably the most we’ve seen Kurt sell and take a beating so far as D’Lo hits him with all his signature moves but it's not enough and Kurt quickly polishes him off with the Olympic Slam. Kurt’s celebration is hilariously over the top. 
• Val Venis challenges The British Bulldog for the European title after their fall out on Raw. Val’s pre match promo is full filth and is about sucking meat and juices. Jesus. In the end, Bulldog retains when he intentionally gets disqualified for a blatant low blow in front of the referee.
• Kane challenges The Big Bossman for the Hardcore Championship. This is the first time Bossman has defended this title in a while! He actually hasn’t been on much of a winning streak since becoming number one contender to the WWF title. As the two fight through the crowd, Viscera once again tries to make a move on Tori. Tori runs to find Kane to defend her and he’s attacked from behind by Prince Albert who helps Bossman retain the Hardcore title. Kane comforts Tori as all three heels run off. 

• Rikishi makes his in ring debut after showing up on Raw this past week. Too Cool accompanied him to the ring and they seem to have already made the switch to babyface. Rikishi takes on Joey Abs from the Mean Street Posse. Rikishi wins quickly and easily and after the match Too Cool and Rikishi perform what would become their signature spot - Rikishi tries to leave, Too Cool stops him and puts his sunglasses on him and the three of them dance together! 

• The Godfather has eight hoes this week for his match with Al Snow. Snow is upset over the Mankind and Rock stuff and he attacks the Godfather before the bell. Snow tries to use a chair but misses and is quickly finished off with a hoe train in the corner and a roll up. The Godfather wins. 

Raw is War - November 29th, 1999

Dearly Beloved…

The first of several video packages about Stephanie McMahon and Test’s relationship tonight. The main event of Raw is set to be their wedding ceremony, live in the ring. A wrestling wedding? What could possibly go wrong.

Triple H (with a nice button hole flower in his leather jacket) leads DX to the ring. He reminds us all that on Smackdown he issued a temporary restraining order against Vince McMahon meaning he can’t come within 50 feet of DX. Triple H promises to beat Vince half to death at Armageddon and that there will be no wedding tonight. That brings out Vince who mockingly calls them tough guys for having a restraining order against him, and promises that he’s going to get Triple H’s blood all over his hands. He books Triple H against Test tonight (which is apparently what Test wanted as a wedding gift, to be all sweaty for his wedding). He then puts The New Age Outlaws and X-Pac in a six man tag against Mankind and The Rock (but doesn’t say who the third member of that team will be, see the next section for that match).. Vince says that no one will get involved in the wedding tonight - if anyone who isn’t a member of the McMahon family or an invited guest comes out to the wedding later they will be fired on the spot. Vince leaves satisfied, but Triple H laughs at him.

The second of the wedding related videos serves mostly to remind us that Stephanie McMahon’s hen party took place in Las Vegas (with a heavily intoxicated Mae Young and Moolah as guests). Steph being drunk in Las Vegas will be important later. They’d show the party in Vegas a couple of times, but it looks like the exact same room the party on Smackdown took place in, which was not in Las Vegas. 

Triple H enters first for the match with Test. There’s no referee but coming down after Test is a referee wearing a Vince McMahon mask over his head. I think it’s pretty obviously Vince, but he’s risking breaking the restraining order and going to jail with the mask on. Triple H spends the match trying to re-break Test’s nose, while King and JR lay it on thick and hammer home that yes, the man in the mask is probably Vince. King does this a lot - it's like he’s worried we won’t get the joke and goes above and beyond to explain the punchline afterwards. Triple H dominates Test but the referee won’t count. He gets focused on trying to unmask the referee until a tuxedo wearing Shane McMahon runs out and cracks Triple H with a chair shot! Test hits his massive top rope elbow drop and the referee counts super fast to give Test the win! After the McMahons leave, Triple H laughs off the pretty blatant screw job. He still has something big planned for tonight. Backstage after the fourth “Stephanie’s bachelorette party in Las Vegas” video, Triple H berates some police officers for not being able to tell that the referee was Vince and sends them to arrest him for breaking the restraining order. They do later, but Patterson and Brisco are happy to be his alibi and protect Vince from being arrested.

Both wedding parties get ready in the back with all the men wearing tuxedos and all smiles, and the women looking lovely in their dresses. 

With the ring all dolled up for the ceremony, the wedding takes centre stage. The women in the crowd squeal loudly for all the male wrestlers in their tuxedos. The women are all Steph’s real life friends too. This segment did huge ratings as it happens - they promoted this on the cover of USA Today. The fans are actually pretty respectful as the wedding guests all make their entrances. I laughed when Test came out to his actual theme song! Vince McMahon walks Stephanie to the ring last and she looks lovely in her wedding gown. This is true long term storytelling - Test originally asked Steph out on a date back in May! The priest does the real wedding ceremony and it's very moving and feels like a real wedding! A male and female singer on the stage perform “Together” which is the same song that played for Macho Man and Elizabeth’s wedding at Summerslam 1991. Shout out to Test who is sweating pretty heavily, having wrestled earlier. I bet it's hot in that arena under the lights too.

The tension builds (and the crowd cheers) as we approach the “if anyone objects..” portion of the ceremony. We all saw this coming didn’t we? “My Time” plays and the arena lights drop. Triple H doesn’t just interrupt - he interrupts with his full entrance! I laughed out loud. It helps that I love that song so much. Triple H doesn’t really speak at first instead just throwing to a video on the titantron.

The video is shakey camcorder footage of Triple H in a convertible on the Las Vegas strip driving to the tunnel of love drive-through wedding chapel. In the passenger seat is an unconscious Stephane McMahon. She has been drugged and passed out and Triple H uses his ventriloquist skills to have her agree to marry him. Triple H and Stephanie McMahon are legally married! None of this makes any sense but it’s best not to think about it and just enjoy it. Triple H is pretty funny insisting the minister go quicker and quicker to get through it. The camera is handed over to Triple H and we find out that the man responsible was the bartender from the hen party earlier. “Hey get a look at the brand new Mr and Mrs Hunter Hearst Helmsley” Back in the arena, the fans are going insane for this big reveal. Test, Stephanie and the rest of the McMahon’s are in tears. I burst out laughing when Triple H called Vince “DAD” and the segment ends when Test runs after Triple H while Vince consoles his weeping little girl.

This is one of my all time favourite segments so here's the recap that opened the following Smackdown so you can see the hilarious highlights. 

Al Snow gets jealous

Backstage, Al Snow talks to Head and makes fun of The Rock, assuming that he will be the third member of their team for the six man tag vs. DX later. Later he’d try to convince Mankind of the same but Mick is too focused on being happy that Rock n’ Sock are back together. 

In another segment where Al Snow rants to Mankind about how much he hates The Rock and makes fun of his eyebrow and elbow, The Rock walks in on them. The Rock doesn’t know who “Al” is and talks to Mankind about him like he’s not there. It’s very funny and Mick loves it, but Snow looks increasingly furious. Mankind might not be Al’s tag partner anymore but he does still like him and checks they’re still on for Disneyland tomorrow.

D-Generation X enters first for the six man tag and we don’t have to wait to find out who The Rock and Mankind’s partner will be as Kane actually comes out first, seemingly volunteering. Given how much Al Snow has lost lately he was never a great choice anyway but Kane is definitely better. The crowd explodes for The Rock, they are mental. The Rock n’ Sock Connection are the number one contenders for the tag team titles and will face The New Age Outlaws at Armageddon. Mick Foley’s book has now become the number 1 best selling book on the New York Times list but because it’s by “a wrestler” the critics wouldn’t review it. X-Pac’s offence in this match consists entirely of spinning heel kicks. The Rock has the match won for his team with a Rock Bottom on Mr. Ass but Al Snow runs in with Head and gets the team disqualified. DX technically wins and while Kane chases off after X-Pac, The Rock lays the smack down on Al and drops him with a spinebuster and then a People’s Elbow. 

Chris Jericho and Chyna

Intercontinental Champion Chyna heads out to the ring. Her hand is heavily bandaged up and even though it was only a minor cosmetic change, the new IC title belt looks way nicer. She says that her hand feels better after hitting Y2J with a hammer on Smackdown, and calls him out to the ring because she can beat him with one hand anyway. Jericho does come out and gets a big cheer. Chyna got a pretty mixed reaction. He calls her a “jacked up mutant” and says he’d love to beat her for the title tonight but tells us he can’t because Chyna gave him a concussion on Smackdown. This is treated like a joke reason to not wrestle tonight and JR and King act like he’s a coward for letting “a concussion” stop him from wrestling which is pretty shocking in hindsight. Chyna tells Y2J to chill out as he screams about what a bad person she is, and Miss Kitty sneaks up behind him and sprays him with a fire extinguisher. So no match tonight, but they will fight at Armageddon for the Intercontinental title.

Other Happenings

• The show opens in the arena with the WWF Champion The Big Show. He is teaming with Kane to face Hardcore Champion The Big Bossman and Viscera. This match doesn’t last long as while the referee is distracted watching Show and Bossman fight, X-Pac hits Kane with a steel chair and then X-Factors him onto it allowing Viscera to splash and pin Kane. After the match, Tori gets in the ring to confront X-Pac, who spits at her and then blasts her with a spinning heel kick before running away from Kane. It’s mentioned during this match that Kane will face X-Pac in a steel cage match at Armageddon. Kane would get another crack at X-Pac later in the show (see the “Al Snow gets jealous” section)

• Matt Hardy in singles action (with Jeff and Terri at ringside) against Edge (along with Christian). The action is good and both teams end up diving out onto the other’s partners which causes the four kind-of-friends to brawl. Edge pins Matt Hardy with a spear. The Hardys won more before they had Terri in their corner.
• This week’s Godfather’s hoe count is at six. I’m not sure why I keep track of that. He is very popular - this gimmick is OVER in 1999. He’s in action against Steve Blackman. Blackman is scheduled to face Kurt Angle at Armageddon. Blackman wins a quick, nothing match with a martial arts kick. 
• Bradshaw and Faarooq play poker with Bubba Ray and D-Von Dudley. The Acolytes pretend to not know the game very well and are trying to hustle The Dudleys. There’s a couple of these segments where the four make inside jokes but it all ends in tears and after Bubba bets everything and Bradshaw makes one too many momma jokes, it turns into a fight. 

• Too Cool along with their new best buddy Rikishi Fatu take on Hardcore and Crash Holly in tag team action. Hardcore makes fun of Rikishi’s weight before the match. There’s no build for it, outside of The Holly’s obsession with fighting “super heavyweights” but Rikishi is teaming with Viscera to face The Holly Cousins at Armageddon. Crash Holly is quickly beaten up and pinned by Too Cool with a top rope leg drop. Rikishi drops Hardcore with a belly to belly suplex and Banzai Drop in the corner and then dances with Too Cool, which the fans LOVE already. 

• Michael Cole in the ring brings out Barbara Bush. She is the big buxom blonde EMT that has been on TV here and there over the past two months. Ivory stripped her top off and pushed her into the big “gravy bowl” during the gravy bowl match on Smackdown. The fans chant “we want puppies” because it’s 1999 and they’re gross. Barbara - who says to call her BB - challenges Ivory to an evening gown match. That brings Ivory out to the ring and they two fight and strip each other’s tops off. BB has very large boobs, which is why she has been signed.
• Val Venis, who has a European title match with The British Bulldog at Armageddon, seems to have dropped his main event heel push and be back to being plain old Val Venis with the innuendo laced pre-match promos. He’s facing Kurt Angle who is furious the fans would cheer a porn star over him. Kurt wins easily when Bulldog comes down and hits Val with a steel chair behind the referee’s back and Angle follows up with the Olympic Slam. Kurt is still undefeated.

• There’s a shot of all of Test’s buddies getting changed and ready for the wedding - Patterson, Brisco, Edge, Christian, Shawn Staziak and D’Lo Brown. I think that's interesting as it's obviously who Test is friendliest with in real life and gives you an idea of what the social dynamic was backstage at the time. All the young, good looking men buddied up.

Smackdown! - December 2nd, 1999

Newly Weds

After a video recapping the wedding at the end of Raw (I laughed my arse off), Vince McMahon is waiting for Triple H in the parking lot with a baseball bat. Shane tries his very best to calm Vince down and not do something that’ll get him put in jail!

In the arena after the Smackdown intro, Stephane McMahon herself walks down to the ring. She actually gets some boos - apparently some people believe that she was in on it and was a willing party despite being quite clearly unconscious in the video. She calmly and quietly asks Vince and Shane to come down to the ring because she has something to say to everyone. The fans chant “slut” because it’s the 90s brah. Dave Hebner goes to get them in the parking lot and let them know she’s calling for them. Stephanie blames herself and accepts responsibility. She says she should have known better and shouldn’t have drunk so much. She was drugged. The fans don’t seem to believe her and keep booing. She’s actually a pretty good promo and actor here - definitely takes after her dad. She just seems sad but she does get angry when telling Triple H that she hates him. The fans cheer when she says that he “used her” which is a little gross. Vince and Shane do finally come to the ring. She says that she doesn’t want to be coddled and makes them both promise not to do anything or act and let her deal with this on her own. She wants to get herself out of this mess. Shane agrees but it takes some effort to get Vince to agree. He is furious and wants to kill Triple H.

Stephanie would be seen waiting out in the parking lot for Triple H to arrive. 

After waiting for him in the parking lot, when Triple H does arrive Stephanie bursts into tears when she sees him and runs away. 

In the arena, the DX music plays and X-Pac and The New Age Outlaws wheel a couple of shopping trolleys to the ring full of wrapped presents. X-Pac issues a warning to Kane and taunts him about Tori and Mr. Ass says that he and Roaddogg will easily defeat The Rock n’ Sock connection. But that’s Armageddon and Roaddogg talks about how tonight they will take care of The Hardys and The Big Show in a six man tag team match. He then hypes up Triple H as the newest member of the McMahon family, who then comes out to Vince McMahon’s theme song, swaggering and wearing a Vince mask.

He unmasks (and makes sure to put on his leather cap like a real douche) and shows off his golden wedding ring. The gifts that DX brought out are wedding presents. They’re pretty funny as they do through the presents and make jokes about the wedding night. Roaddogg pretends to cry, and gives him the main present which is a front row ticket for Armageddon so that Stephanie can be at ringside when Triple H beats her dad senseless. He uses his “new found family stroke” to make the match anything goes, falls count anywhere. I actually thought it already was unsanctioned but maybe someone misspoke and mentioned that before it had been announced. JR will often talk about matches that are coming up later on episodes of Raw before the segments setting up those matches have aired. 

After multiple segments of Stephanie waiting for Test to arrive and him finally getting to the arena, we see the tearful meeting between the two. Test cries, Stephanie says she was drugged and still loves Test. Test doesn’t know what to feel and leaves. I get that the emotions involved are complex but it doesn’t really make sense that these two would fall out. It wasn’t Stephanie’s fault, and nothing has changed between her and Test surely? After the break, Vince and Shane console a sobbing Stephanie and encourage her to give Test some time to get his head together.

D-Generation X get ready for Armageddon

As Viscera preens in front of a mirror and talks about how Tori will want him after he beat Kane on Raw, Kane jumps him from behind. They’re supposed to wrestle later. After a recap of X-Pac kicking Tori in the face on Raw the pair have fought all the way to the ring. The match begins and Kane has control but when X-Pac comes out to taunt him, it gets Kane counted out. Viscera officially wins. Kane goes back to the ring and plants Viscera with a chokeslam. X-Pac watches with a smirk but he jumps out of his skin when Kane signals his pyro. Pac looks like such a smug unlikeable prick with his facials and crotch chops. And apparently DX didn’t travel together this week because Triple H doesn’t arrive until later in the show. 

In the main event X-Pac teams with the WWF Tag Team Champions Roaddogg and Bad Ass Billy Gunn against WWF Champion The Big Show and The Hardy Boyz. DX isolates and works over Jeff Hardy until he gets a tag to The Big Show who runs through all three men. Matt and Jeff work together and after a tornado DDT from Matt onto Billy, Jeff hits a Swanton Bomb off of The Big Show’s shoulders! X-Pac breaks up that pin but Jeff is able to rull up Pac to win the match for his team! While the three celebrate, The Big Bossman runs to the ring and clocks The Big Show in the back of the head with his nightstick and gets both Hardyz in the ribs allowing DX to beat them down while Bossman looks on. The Rock and Mankind run down and fight with The Outlaws ahead of their tag team title match at Armageddon and to get some payback from earlier (see the next section), and Kane feels left out and comes down to get some of X-Pac too! The babyfaces clear the ring to end Smackdown. 

The People vs. Al Snow

In the locker room, Al Snow keeps watching back The Rock beating him up on Raw. He is furious. Mankind tries to talk him down. Snow wants a match with The Rock tonight and says he’ll tear him apart. After a break, Mankind is wandering around backstage looking for Rocky. 

Backstage Mankind goes to see The Rock and talk him into being a little nicer to Al. Rocky is unmoved and as he starts making fun of Snow, is jumped from behind. Al Snow really does hate The Rock. Mankind splits them up.

The Rock enters first for his match with Al Snow. Not because Al is more important but rather so that The Rock would have time to cut a funny promo ripping on Al beforehand. He has the production truck play the footage of Snow attacking him earlier and then promises to meet Snow before he even gets to the ring and whip his monkey ass all over Anaheim, which draws big “Rocky” chants. The Rock is a man of his word and meets Snow halfway to the ring and this match starts as a fight around the ring. Al Snow was at his most popular when he was Hardcore champion and this attempt to move him up the card and work with Mankind and The Rock has made him less popular. That’s fine in theory because it really does seem like a heel turn is incoming. The referee goes down which lets Snow use a steel chair as a weapon and take control of the three time WWF Champion. The match is heated and Al gets a couple of near falls but The Rock wins handily with the People’s Elbow. He has started using a spinebuster to set that move up which is new here but became his trademark. After the match, Al Snow attacks The Rock in a jealous rage and when Roaddogg and Mr. Ass run down it turns into a three on one beating. The Tag Team Champions leave when Mankind runs out with a steel chair but Al Snow doesn’t back down so Mick is forced to threaten him with the chair to get him to stop attacking The Rock.

Other Happenings

• This episode of Smackdown was at the Arrowhead Pond in Anaheim California. That’s where Wrestlemania 2000 will be and they mention a couple of times that tickets are still available by mail order only which is funny. The internet wasn’t as widely used and user friendly as it would be even a year later. 
• This Smackdown also features the official confirmation that Stone Cold Steve Austin did need serious neck surgery and would be out for an “extended period”
• Edge and Christian enter through the crowd for a match with The Dudley Boyz. Edge and Christian have gotten so popular since the tag team ladder match at No Mercy. Both these teams will be included in a tag team battle royal at Armageddon where the winners get a tag title shot at the Royal Rumble PPV. This is a good match where both teams use a lot of the double teams they’d become known for. Edge hurts his knee on a top rope hurricanrana and that lets D-Von easily pin him off a running crossbody. The Dudleys attack after the bell and throw Christian from the ring so they can work on Edge’s hurt leg. The Acolytes who had their issues with Bubba and D-Von at Raw come down and chase them off. 
• D’Lo Brown challenges The British Bulldog for the European title. Val Venis is currently scheduled to get a title shot at Armageddon. D’Lo talks before the match and takes issue with Bulldog saying he’s the best European champion. D’Lo says he’s a four time champion and he’s the only one who cared and tried to bring prestige to the title. He is right. Bulldog has the Mean Street Posse with him for the first time in a couple of weeks. Val Venis runs down during this match and attacks Bulldog, which D’Lo takes offence to and starts to fight with Val himself. The match ends via disqualification and as Bulldog sneaks off his two prospective challengers fight it out in the ring. 
• Out in the arena, Mankind comes out to talk about his book being a New York times best seller and is very proud of the fact (and rightfully so) but when he tries to bring out The Rock and Al Snow to play peacekeeper he’s inputted by Chris Jericho who makes fun of him and his book. He mentions one day writing his own book - he’s written three now. The first two are pretty good. That leads to Y2J and Mankind wrestling and believe it or not, this is the one and only televised match these two men would ever have. It’s really good, but short and when Jericho’s Armageddon opponent, Chyna comes out and hits him with the IC title belt, Mick seems to have the match won. Mankind accidentally bumps into Miss Kitty and the distraction allows Y2J to roll up Mankind and win the match! That’s a huge win.

• Kurt Angle has an exhibition match with Steve Blackman at Armageddon but he teams with the Lethal Weapon here to face Mosh and Thrasher, The Headbangers. The two skirt wearers double team Angle but Blackman gets sick of watching and sends Kurt to the outside so that he can do the wrestling. There is some messy teamwork but Kurt steals the victory for his team with an Olympic Slam on Thrasher. Blackman seems annoyed by the way Angle is celebrating. It’s a little obnoxious. Jerry Lawler is his biggest fan now though.
• Crash Holly accompanied by his cousin Hardcore has a “special challenge match” against Rikishi Fatu, who has Too Cool with him. Hardcore Holly joins commentary and talks about how he and Crash are super heavyweights and only want to wrestle super heavyweights. Rikishi easily defeats Crash with the sit down piledriver. Post match, Too Cool gets the sunglasses on Rikishi and the fans come alive for the three dancing. People love seeing Rikishi shake his big ass! 

Raw is War - December 6th, 1999

Stephanie takes action

Stephanie McMahon arrives in the parking lot with some paperwork by limo.

Backstage Stephanie tells her dad that she knows he’ll kick Triple H’s ass at Armageddon and she has a bunch of papers and tonight will deal with her own issues with Triple H by herself. Later, she went to the DX locker room and delivers the annulment papers to him. X-Pac is a tool and giggles through the whole thing. This is why X-Pac heat is a thing. Triple H smirks and obviously doesn’t sign the papers, asking instead if she’ll get in the shower with him. She cries and leaves the papers with him.

Triple H comes out to the ring carrying the papers Stephanie gave him earlier and a large bouquet of flowers. He says that he doesn’t care what the fans think about him, but wants to know how they feel about his wife. He points out that on Smackdown while she was in the ring crying and pouring her heart out the fans chanted things like “slut” and “whore” at her. Now Triple H is obviously being disingenuous here but he is right. The fans were gross. They cheered back in May when she talked about basically being sexually assaulted by The Undertaker, and they cheered a few weeks ago on Smackdown when DX implied they gang raped a college girl. I’d LOVE to read between the lines and be more gentle about it but that is absolutely, undeniably what they were saying they did. Triple H says that he never saw these annulment papers coming and he says that he and Steph were “two kids in love” and blames the fans for ruining it and turning her against him. He then pretends to cry.

He says that if she comes down to the ring, he’ll sign the papers. Stephanie does come down and with anger on her face she throws his flowers into the crowd. He says that he was going to sign them but after checking her out in person, he’s starting to feel all warm and fuzzy and wants to stay married. She says she’s sick of his games and that she hopes Vince cripples him at Armageddon. That is pretty insensitive given what happened to Droz only two months ago. Triple H likes what she says - if Vince beats him at Armageddon, he will sign the papers and grant her the annulment of their apparently legally airtight marriage. He does point out that no matter what happens, Vince will never grant him a WWF title match so that’s what he wants if he wins - a shot at the WWF Championship. Stephanie agrees. He wants to hear it from Vince himself, or he won’t believe her. Vince comes out, but he can’t get any closer because of the 50 foot restraining order. Vince agrees and says that on Smackdown he’ll have it all in writing so that Triple H can’t weasel out of it. Triple H says he likes to seal the deal with a kiss and forces himself on Stephanie as McMahon is forced to watch on. After the ad break, Mankind goes to see Vince and offers to give him some help and pointers on hardcore rules matches.

Kane (with Tori) teams up with Test to take on the two men responsible for all their women problems - X-Pac and Triple H. There is a ton of story and heat in this match. The four men fight and brawl and it's pretty wild. X-Pac chases Tori into the ring when it all breaks down and tries to give Tori a Bronco Buster but Kane catches him by the throat and throws him out of the ring. As he chases him, Triple H uses a low blow and a Pedigree to defeat poor Test and win the match. 

The Truth comes out

Mankind comes out to the ring to once again talk about how his book is number one on the New York Times Best Seller list and calls out the critics who refuse to review it. They show the newspaper on screen to prove it really was number one, like we don’t believe them. He then turns his attention to his two best friends - Al Snow and The Rock. Snow keeps attacking The Rock and is very upset that Mankind has forgiven The Rock for throwing his book in the trash, something which Rocky denies. The Rock has barely interacted in this storyline outside of the actual wrestling, but he does seem to begrudgingly be quite fond of Mick Foley and even read his book. Snow comes out and says that he’s Mankind’s only friend and that The Rock doesn’t like him and the fans don’t care about him. He goes full heel, barking “shut up!” at the crowd and says they only care about Hell in a Cell and not his book. Mankind says that Snow is his best friend but he’s also friends with Gerry Brisco and it doesn’t mean he wants to work in his bodyshop. He says he likes Al a lot but he doesn’t want to be his tag team partner. He likes teaming up with The Rock. This is a really good promo. Mankind says he’s happy to play the fool because he likes it, The Rock likes it and the people like it. Snow challenges Mick and The Rock to a tag match tonight and after reminding us all how upset he was about Rocky throwing the book in the trash he admits that it was HE that binned it. He was upset by all the Al Snow jokes and says the book is garbage! The two start fighting and are split up by the officials.

There is a shot backstage of The Rock and Mankind conversing. We don’t hear what they’re saying but it's fun seeing them palling around backstage. The Rock DOES like Mankind and after the months of tension, it's a genuinely lovely thing to see.

Mankind and The Rock enter first for the tag team main event. Not because Al Snow matters more, we just need the reveal of who his mystery partner is. It’s Y2J Chris Jericho! He has gotten really popular, but continues to play the heel. Jericho is pretty funny during his opening promo but talks for too long and gets clocked by Chyna from behind ahead of their match at Armageddon. That brings out The Rock and the match starts there on the ramp with Mick going after Snow. I always thought the reveal that Al Snow binned the book and framed The Rock was a GTV but I was wrong! As The Rock plants Jericho with a Rock Bottom on the ramp, Mankind locks Al Snow in the Mandible Claw in the ring. Rock n’ Sock have it won but are both jumped by the New Age Outlaws! After a beating to The Rock outside the ring they turn their attention to Mankind. The Rock does barely fight them off but Snow gets a cheap shot with Head in on Mick before he leaves.

The Big Bastard

Ahead of their WWF Championship match, Viscera attacks The Big Show and splashes him through a table in the backstage area! 

The Big Show defends the WWF Championship against Viscera in what has been promoted all night as the largest WWF title match of all time. They’re both 500lbs so they are a legit half ton of humanity (American Ton). After their backstage skirmish, Show goes out to meet Viscera and the match starts outside the ring. Viscera uses a samoan drop and considering the awe of the size of these men and moves, the fans are pretty quiet through all of this. Show uses a huge back suplex too. With a bodyslam and, amazingly, a dropkick from the top rope - The Big Show wins.

This was pretty cool but the fans barely reacted to any of it. As Show celebrates, up on the titantron The Big Bossman seems to be at the house of The Big Show’s mother! He confronts her with his birth certificate and forces her through tears to confirm that Paul Wight is in fact a bastard and was conceived out of wedlock. The very idea that ANYONE cared about that kind of thing anymore in 1999 is laughable but his mother was very upset. Bossman gleefully tells Show that he’s illegitimate and “a bastard”. After the break, Big Show is on the phone crying to his mother. I mean…who cares? They are a God-fearing, Bible loving crowd aren’t they, the Americans?

Other Happenings

• Been a while since I mentioned this - the Raw intro still heavily features Stone Cold and The Undertaker despite them now being away for a while. Ken Shamrock is still in there too even though he is never coming back but I guess they didn’t know that yet.
• The New Age Outlaws open the show and as much as Roaddogg antagonises the crowd and makes it clear that they’re heels now, the fans still cheer and loudly sing along with his catchphrases. The WWF Tag champions have a LOT of female admirers by the sound of the crowd squeals for both of them. They are defending against Too Cool (with Rikishi) and debut a new theme song here? It doesn’t last and they’re back to using their classic “You look fly today” music soon enough. This is a decent little match and Too Cool seem to have the titles won after their double team leg drop on Roaddogg but The Holly Cousins run in to catch the disqualification. The Hollys lay out Rikishi with a steel chair, who they’ll meet in a special super heavyweight tag match at Armageddon, and The Outlaws lay out Too Cool. 

• The Hardy Boyz (with the ever useless Terri) take on the team of Kurt Angle and Steve Blackman. They were opponents at Armageddon but formed a successful team on Smackdown, even if Kurt stole the pin and hogged the spotlight. He cuts another pre match promo demanding the people cheer for their Olympic Hero and lectures about the three Is. I already love Kurt Angle. Kurt continues to talk down to Blackman and says he’s a great apprentice. Angle once again steals the victory after Blackman gets a cheap shot with one of his weapons on Jeff Hardy. Angle gives Blackman no-credit.
• Val Venis meets D’Lo Brown to determine who’ll face The British Bulldog at Armageddon for the European title. D’Lo interrupts Val’s pre match promo so Val jumps D’Lo before he’s finished his entrance. The match ends abruptly when the Bulldog and the Mean Street Posse attack both men and cause a double DQ.
• The Godfather (with five hoes this week) takes on Prince Albert. Last night The Godfather was facing The Big Bossman (who, don't forget, is the number one contender for the WWF title at Armageddon) and had him beat but Albert made the save. The Godfather wins a short match with the hoe-train and then a roll up combo he uses. He has been on quite the win streak lately! 
• Hardcore Holly faces Rikishi. Rikishi quickly and easily demolishes Hardcore while Too Cool laughs on commentary. Their dancing to the generic theme song they inexplicably have this week doesn’t get half the reaction it normally does so I’m glad they go back to their previous theme right away. 
• Michael Cole in the ring brings out one of the participants in Armageddon’s evening gown match - BB, the female EMT. She’s wearing a white evening gown but before she can speak she’s interrupted by WWF Women’s Champion Ivory in her own evening gown. Ivory makes a bunch of jokes about fake boobs, and also continues her own running joke of having a thing for Michael Cole calling him “boy toy”. Ivory mentions that the match at Armageddon is a four corners match which is the first they’ve mentioned that on Raw or Smackdown since BB made the challenge last week. Jacqueline comes out, and when Ivory asks who the fourth woman is, Chyna's music plays. Everyone cheers assuming its Intercontinental Champion Chyna but it is in fact her little friend Miss Kitty. It seems to be news to Miss Kitty who doesn’t want to wrestle and is worried about being stripped to her bra and panties because…she doesn’t wear underwear. The fans cheer loudly and King makes my skin crawl with the most obnoxious “here kitty kitty kitty” of his career. 
• A couple of times during the show, the titantron is taken over by a mysterious logo and the arena is bathed in orange light for a few moments. Another pending debut. It happens during Steve Blackman and Jacqueline’s entrances. 

Smackdown! - December 9th, 1999

Vince and Triple H put it in writing

In the McMahon locker room Shane and Vince discuss how happy they are to have banned DX from getting involved in each other's matches tonight. Test arrives and Shane and Vince are happy to see him. They, along with Linda, leave him alone with Steph to talk about their relationship and future. Test is very upset and calls off the engagement. I don’t really get why - none of this is either of their fault? They agree to stay friends and will always care about each other. He leans in for a kiss but then X-Pac busts into the room and says that Test is making a move on his friend's wife. God I hate X-Pac.

Patterson and Brisco go to get the McMahons - it is time for the contract signing. All four McMahon family members head down to the ring, along with the stooges and after Vince has recapped the new stipulations for the no holds barred match (if Vince wins then Triple H will end the marriage with Steph legally, and if Triple H wins then he gets a WWF title match) Triple H comes out onto the stage. They can’t get any closer as Triple H still has the restraining order against Vince. Triple H takes issue with Vince calling this contract signing a formality. Triple H is taking the contract and stipulations very, very seriously. Triple H also talks about a lifetime of “wedded bliss” with Stephanie which is quite a funny line looking back from 20+ years later.

Triple H kind of goes on a bit really and doesn’t say anything new or noteworthy but continues to taunt Vince McMahon. He can’t walk down and deliver the papers because of the restraining order so after Triple H requests Stephanie come and get them Vince sends Shane instead. With Shane as the go-between both Vince and Triple H get the contract signed but when Shane takes them back up to Triple H he’s attacked by D-Generation X and thrown spectacularly off the entrance ramp, flipping and crashing to the floor below through a table! The most annoying thing about the whole segment? The way X-Pac IMMEDIATELY starts dancing the second the DX theme song starts to play. Stop dancing. 

X-Pac faces Test. He’s fired up over the whole Stephanie situation and to my shock, X-Pac wins a short match clean as a whistle with the X-Factor. They’ve obviously not planned on pushing Test coming out of this storyline and feud with Triple H. 

Triple H vs. Kane is the main event. Before Kane enters, Triple H gets into a shoving match with Earl Hebner so Triple H knocks him down and hits a couple of moves on his leg. He’s stretchered out and is replaced by the same mystery referee as last week - in a Vince McMahon match. Triple H knocks him down so another takes his place. In total, as the match goes we get three different referees in Vince McMahon matches. All the distraction leads to Kane chokeslamming Triple H, who rolls out of the ring and crawls away being pursued by all three Vince-mask wearing officials. As The Game backs up the ramp he’s attacked by what is very clearly the real Vince - he’s wearing a Vince mask too but it’s the same suit Vince had on earlier. He knocks out all of D-Generation X with a steel pipe to end Smackdown! 

The Bossman runs away

After a recap of The Big Bossman revealing that The Big Show is “illegitimate” on Raw, The Bossman comes out as he and Prince Albert face The Hardy Boyz. King seems to have decided that The Big Show being “a bastard” doesn’t just mean he was born out of wedlock, it means that his father wasn’t his real father? They haven’t actually said that which I think means that no one working for the WWF knew what being a bastard actually meant. The Big Bossman was fully confident before the match, thinking that The Big Show wasn’t here tonight but he arrives backstage during the match and is heading out to the ring! As The Hardyz beat down the Bossman, the Show arrives and shoves Matt and Jeff out the way to get to the Bossman and throws him across the ring! A low blow from Albert helps Bossman escape and the WWF Champion gives chase up the ramp and through the backstage area. Bossman and Albert get into a waiting car and speed away.

Y2J and Chyna get in their final shots

Roaddogg opens up the show and takes on Chris Jericho. Both men are heels but they have a history and are both so over that the fans don’t mind. They’re definitely toying with turning Jericho face anyway. His verbal barbs at Chyna on the way to the ring does bring Chyna out to watch too. There’s no reference to Chyna’s history with Roaddogg or DX and she hasn’t crossed paths with or even mentioned Triple H since No Mercy. It’s definitely for the best. Jericho hits the springboard moonsault and covers but Roaddogg’s foot is on the bottom rope. Y2J wins but then Chyna points out the foot on the ropes which causes the referee to restart the match. Roaddogg hits his pumphandle slam and covers but this time when Y2J’s foot is on the ropes, Chyna shoves it off and costs him the match.

Other Happenings

• Kurt Angle enters first and introduces his tag team partner Steve Blackman, after taking some shots at the local sports teams. They’ve had some success as a team and are facing The Dudley Boyz tonight. The Dudleys have added the “bomb dropping” sound effect to the start of their theme music. I commented on it a lot in 1998 when I was talking about how Stone Cold and The Rock were just - sometimes in a way that can’t quite be explained - better than everyone else. Like you can just effortlessly tell they’re “the stars” of the show. You can see it with Kurt Angle too. He is almost instantly at a top level from his moves to his selling to his promos. He was a STAR from day one. After some miscommunication, The Dudleys hit a 3D on Blackman and pin him, Technically Kurt Angle’s first loss but he lays the blame squarely with Blackman. He says that he is still undefeated, and then gives Steve the Olympic Slam! 

• The same logo and orange arena lighting as on Raw takes over the show a couple of times.
• Christian challenges The British Bulldog for the European Championship. Bulldog is supposed to defend against Val and D’Lo at Armageddon in a triple threat match, and Christian along with Edge are supposed to be in the tag team battle royal. Christian might win the European title but the Mean Street Posse attacks and ruins the match. Val Venis and D’Lo Brown come down to join in the fight.
• Kevin Kelly interviews Miss Kitty ahead of her WWF Women’s title match at Armageddon. He snidely laughs at her attempts to take the match seriously and dismisses her as having no chance. She says after Sunday people will call her The Kat (which they will) and then attacks him and rips Kevin’s shirt off for being rude about her chances of winning.

• After a great video package for Mankind and Al Snow’s falling out, Mankind takes on Al Snow. I liked the video so much I went ahead and grabbed it for you lovely people which is below. Al is a full heel now, which means dressing all in black and not having “Help Me” on his head anymore. I liked goofy Al Snow. He’s very aggressive with Mick and keeps screaming “don’t you know I love you!?” as they fight on the floor. The story is that Snow is hitting hard but Mick is reluctant to take out his anger on his friend - I think he feels a bit sorry for Al! Snow ends up getting himself disqualified for using a chair and beats down Mick.

• The Rock faces Bad Ass Billy Gunn. Before the match, The Rock makes mention of some baseball players in attendance and includes them in his standard “I’ll shove things up your ass” promo directed at Mr. Ass. In an odd bit of booking, the referee gets knocked down and Billy Gunn has the match won with a Fameasser but theres no referee to count! The Rock comes back and wins shortly after with the People’s Elbow.