Raw - September 23rd 2002

Alliances

Nature Boy Ric Flair makes his way down to the ring to explain his actions at Unforgiven, costing Rob Van Dam the World Heavyweight Championship. He says that Triple H called him pathetic and said he’d lost his passion and he was right. Flair says he was wasting his time giving advice and guidance to young punks who didn’t respect it, instead of someone like Triple H who idolised him. He says he’ll be by Triple H’s side and will show him how to style and profile like the Nature Boy and stay World Champion as long as he wants to be  so he can live the high life.

RVD is shown arriving at the arena backstage with taped ribs and is on his way to attack Flair for what he did. He’s jumped from behind as he walks to the ring by Triple H and with a series of stiff kicks to RVD’s taped up, injured ribs they leave him beaten down in the ring. Triple H grabs the mic and tells RVD that he can’t win and needs to accept it. Bubba Ray Dudley runs down to make the save - he’s had his issues with Triple H lately - but is quickly overwhelmed by the two on one odds and beaten up too. Bubba grabs a steel chair and manages to chase Triple H and Flair off but RVD is hurt. After a commercial break, Coach tries to interview a fired up Bubba Ray Dudley. He says he’s sick of it - this is NOT the Triple H show, this is Raw and the Fan’s show. RVD joins him and says they should go and kick Triple H and Flair’s asses. Bubba is in and they shake hands but run into Eric Bischoff. This is NOT the fan’s show, it’s his show. No one calls the shots but him, so he gives them a tag team match tonight against the World Champion and Nature Boy.

Before the main event, Bubba Ray checks on RVD and asks if he’s up to this match tonight. RVD is fired up and shows some anger - Flair and Triple H took his chance to be World Champion, and they even took his Intercontinental title last week. It doesn’t matter if he’s hurt because he’s got nothing left to lose.

It’s unusual for this era of Raw that we haven’t really heard from Triple H tonight but the focus is on his new budding friendship with his real life hero and 16 time World Champion Ric Flair. He’s going to help Triple H fulfil his dream of becoming a Ric Flair tribute act. Bubba looks really strong, throwing around both Triple H and Flair but RVD wants to get his hands on Ric. When the match breaks down and gets chaotic, Bubba sets up a table and puts Flair on it for a Five Star through it. Triple H shoves Van Dam off the top and Flair rolls up Bubba Ray to officially win the tag team match but that’s hardly the issue and the fighting continues as Triple H gets his sledgehammer and they prepare to try and end RVD’s career. Bubba makes the save with a low blow and powerbombs Triple H though the table. Kind of. He hits the corner, missing the table which doesn’t break. They recover and Van Dam puts Triple H on the table and puts him through it with a leg drop off the top to save face. Raw ends with Flair checking on Triple H in the ring as missing that table and hitting it at a funny angle could have injured him for real.

Bischoff Demands Respect

Backstage, Booker T and Goldust host a screening of a special “night at the movies” for various superstars (including Big Show who I guess has no issues with Booker anymore) and the video shown is the replay of Stephanie McMahon outsmarting Eric Bischoff at Unforgiven, leading to him getting a massive Stink Face from a disguised Rikishi. The superstars (which also includes Bubba Ray, Kane and Jeff Hardy) laugh and cheer at their General Manager’s misfortune. Goldust makes a joke about it being worse than a Fozzy concert, and shows a portrait of Rikishi’s ass on top of Bischoff’s head. Rico sees them laughing and rushes off to rat to Bischoff, who is furious at Rico, Rosey and Jamal for leaving early last night (even though he told them to). Eric is infuriated to learn that everyone is laughing at him and promises to put a stop to it.

That leads to Eric Bischoff marching down to the ring in a foul mood. He is angry at all of his Raw superstars for not coming to his rescue at Unforgiven and tells the locker room that they all belong to him. He brings out his “most loyal Raw superstar”, Booker T and demands he come to the ring. Booker does come out with a smile - he seems unintimidated by his boss's bad mood. Booker makes some solid jokes (your breath is heinous, like a fat man’s anus) until Bischoff calls out for his 3-Minute Warning duo. He fluffs the timing and they’re already in the ring by the time he actually says 3 minutes. Booker has no problem fighting off Rosey, Jamal and Rico at first but the three on one odds overwhelm. Goldust runs down to try and help but it’s still three on two and they’re beaten down. Backstage after the commercial break, Bischoff cheers about them teaching Booker and Goldust some respect and books Booker in a singles match against Rico tonight. Chris Jericho shows up and says he wants to make Goldust pay for the things he said about Fozzy so Bischoff books him in an Intercontinental title match against Goldust tonight. That feels like a reward for Goldust rather than a punishment? 

Chris Jericho defends the Intercontinental title against Goldust, who is a former champion in his own right. This is a decent match with Goldust coming close to winning the title more than once. After using the referee as a human shield to cause a distraction for a cheap shot, Jericho locks Goldust in the Walls of Jericho for a submission victory and to retain his title.

Booker T takes on Rico, who is to be fair to him, on a bit of a winning stream in singles action. He beat Ric Flair! Booker wins clean with the Scissors kick but is jumped from behind by Rosey and Jamal who lay him out and crush him with a big top rope splash. Goldust runs down and fights them off and manages to give Rico the Shattered Dreams! He pays for that, and Rosey and Jamal beat him down and crush him with a big splash too. Backstage Booker and Goldust are helped to the back and after a commercial break, Bischoff taunts them and says that next week in Booker’s hometown they’ll face Rosey and Jamal in a tag team match. Booker says Eric is what he eats - an asshole.

Freaks Are Cool!

The Un-Americans defend the WWE Tag Team Championships against the team of Kane and “a partner of his choice”. This was hyped up multiple times throughout the show and his partner turns out to be another debut from Smackdown, former Cruiserweight, Hardcore and European Champion The Hurricane! JR explains that the rosters are now final and there will be no more jumping ship between Raw and Smackdown without an official trade by the General Managers, so nothing should come as a shock to them anymore.

Lance Storm and Christian isolate the smaller Hurricane until he tags in Kane. Despite interference from William Regal, Test and a Tag Team title belt shot to the head, Kane and Hurricane land stereo chokeslams to win the Tag Team titles! Backstage, after the commercial break, Terri interviews Hurricane and asks why Kane picked him as his partner. Hurricane says they both wear masks and use the chokeslam, but also he needed a sidekick. Kane enters and says he picked Hurricane because he’s a freak and freaks are cool!

Kane dips Terri and plants a big kiss on her and the new champions go off to celebrate together.

Elsewhere backstage, Coach interviews Christian and Storm who are angry about losing their titles and blame the referee. Regal says that they only have themselves to blame and can’t be whiners and complainers like Americans. He tells Coach to piss off and says they need to regroup and come back stronger than ever! 

Other Happenings

• Raw opens with the new WWE Women’s Champion defending against Victoria and Molly Holly in a triple threat match. I can only assume this is the triple threat that was supposed to take place last week and got cancelled. Molly looks furious having only lost the title to Trish last night, and Victoria is still a generic women’s wrestler with no character beyond “friends with Molly”. They work together on Trish but miscommunication puts an end to that when Victoria hits Molly by mistake. The fans chant “HLA” so thanks for that guys. Victoria is really impressive here which is fitting - much like Molly herself, she’s one of the more gifted in ring performers of this era. Trish retains the title with a roll up on Molly in a fun little match which was too short to be bad. 

• Jeff Hardy takes on the 500lbs Big Show. They had fun laughing at Bischoff together earlier but this confirms that Show is still a heel. Jeff puts up a fight but Show pretty easily defeats him with a massive chokeslam. 

• After a replay of Tommy Dreamer attacking Christopher Nowinski two weeks ago, the Harvard graduate is backstage in a makeshift classroom so he can teach Tommy a lesson. When Dreamer does show up, Nowinski attacks him with a kendo stick and it turns into a wild brawl which the innovator of violence wins and in a cool spot, he boosts Nowinski up to the roof, putting his head through the ceiling tile which gets a big reaction. It’s a really heated brawl and they destroy all of the furniture in the room. Dreamer slams Nowinski into the wall hard enough to break the plaster board and then finally finishes him with a stiff shot right to the face and head with the kendo stick! It’s a shame they got rid of the Hardcore title right? Nowinski actually needed minor surgery on his jaw so when Dreamer hit him, the commentators really emphasised that he hit Chris “right in the jaw” so they could blame the injury on Tommy. He’ll be out for a couple of months.

• There is an excellent halloween themed commercial for No Mercy starring Pete Rose and Kane. This one is pretty well remembered

• Jim Ross is in the ring to give a glowing introduction to the newest Raw superstar in his debut match against Steven Richards. JR speaks about his grandfather and father and brings out the third generation Randy Orton. He doesn’t get much of a reaction beyond the women in the crowd screaming for who is, to be fair, a very handsome young man. He shakes JR’s hand before he goes to rejoin the commentary desk. Richards looks offended that Orton was given such a big introduction. JR jinxes Randy by saying that “if he doesn’t get injured he’ll have a bright future”. We’ll get to that when it happens. Randy picks up the win with a really nice looking crossbody off the top rope. 

• Union Underground performed the new Raw theme song live in the arena. It’s a great song and this is a pretty good performance! WWE Divas Stacy Keibler, Terri and Jacqueline come out and dance on the stage during it. I’m not sure what the point of this was but it wasn’t bad. Stacy in particular looked great but when doesn’t she? I guess it was an advert for the Forceable Entry CD. I could make a joke about the words Forceable Entry flashing up on the screen while the camera focuses on Stacy shaking her ass...but I won’t because I’m not Jerry Lawler. 

Smackdown - September 26th 2002

Lesnar Avoids a Rematch

Funaki (Smackdown’s number one announcer) interviews WWE Champion Brock Lesnar and asks him about his match with Undertaker at Unforgiven and whether he’ll give him a rematch. Brock says he’ll give Funaki his answer in the ring - Funaki is excited for the scoop and assumes it’ll be an in-ring interview but I suspect Brock means a match.

That segment is next and Funaki comes to the ring carrying a badly bent and misshapen steel chair - it’s the one Undertaker smashed over Lesnar’s head at the PPV. Brock comes out second with his agent Paul Heyman. He is still WWE Champion but Cole and Tazz do a good job of explaining that Undertaker gave him the most brutal beating of his career so far and so he might be ducking a rematch with Undertaker now. Funaki shows the chair to Brock, who throws it out of the ring and assaults Funaki, throwing him around the ring and taking out his aggression on the smaller man as Heyman screams encouragement from ringside. Lesnar finishes with an F5 and still hasn’t answered whether he’ll be giving Undertaker a rematch.

In the locker room, Matt Hardy continues to lecture Shannon Moore about how great he is. He has a count out victory over Undertaker and when Shannon points out that Brock Lesnar had more to do with that than him, Matt is offended. He’s going to defeat Undertaker again tonight and tells Shannon to just sit back and watch. As he leaves for the ring, Brock Lesnar is watching from the shadows. 

Matt Hardy Version 1 tries to show his Mattitude against a furious Undertaker. He interfered in the WWE title match at Unforgiven as Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar seem to be using him and his ego to their advantage. Matt insists on a handshake before the match which he gets but then Undertaker won’t release and starts the beating from there. He easily defeats Matt with a chokeslam and then a Last Ride for good measure but before he can even get back to his feet after the pin, Brock rushes in and cracks him with the WWF title belt which busts Undertaker open. He hits him again as referees try to get the champion to back off and end the assault there.

Triple Threat Main Event

Kurt Angle drops in to see General Manager Stephanie McMahon and after sucking up, asks for a rematch with Chris Benoit tonight. She has something else in mind - a triple threat which will also include Rey Mysterio, seeing as they’re in Rey’s home town. Mysterio is there and after Kurt makes more jokes about Rey being an 8 year old child, Rey promises to hit him with the 619. 

Mark Lloyd interviews Chris Benoit about his victory over Kurt at Unforgiven and his triple threat tonight. Benoit actually comes across as a bit of a babyface here, teasing Mark and then giving lots of praise and respect to both Angle and Mysterio. Having a laugh with the announcers is a babyface mood.

Before the main event, Kurt Angle cuts a promo in the ring insinuating that Rey isn’t really from San Diego and parlaying various insults about the city into accusing the crowd of being illegal immigrants. Jesus Kurt, come on.

Cole has said multiple times that the Benoit/Angle match at Unforgiven is the best match he’s ever seen. It was very good but it wasn't even their best match with each other. The action is fast and furious in this one and the crowd is solidly behind the hometown luchadore. If there were any three other men in this match I’d say moving at this pace means it won’t last long but these three probably could keep up this insane pace for 45 minutes straight if they wanted. After a string of very close near falls, with Benoit and Angle so focused on trying to make each other tap out Rey is able to springboard into a hurricanrana and tight roll up on Benoit to win a great main event, leaving Benoit and Angle in the ring now focused on him rather than each other. 

Conclusion

In what is billed as the conclusion of their rivalry, Edge and Eddie Guerrero clash one more time but this is a no disqualification match. This is physical and the in-ring action is just as good as their Summerslam and Unforgiven clashes. Edge introduces a ladder but misses Eddie and knocks down the referee by mistake. Eddie takes over with a steel chair and blasts Edge across the back and ribs with it, softening him up for a Frog Splash which he misses. A second referee does come down to join the match after a commercial break but hilariously the original referee is still just laying at ringside, out cold. No medical attention for you. Eddie gets the fans chanting his name with some creative use of a ladder, sandwiching Edge between two for a tope over the top rope, and smashing Edge to the mat with a sunset flip powerbomb from the ladder. That specific move is the one Edge mentioned as contributing to the neck surgery he eventually had to take time off for in 2003 (which I’ll talk about when we get to it). Edge finally pulls out the win in an awesome match with a jumping DDT off the ladder. Great, great stuff. Eddie actually gets a standing ovation from the crowd after the match as he struggles to his feet and leaves the arena on his own power.

Other Happenings

• Torrie Wilson and Nidia compete in a bikini contest. Billy and Chuck are the judges and join commentary. Now that they’re babyfaces and have ditched Rico they are acting extremely heterosexual and like drooling perverts for the girls. Nidia sucks up to them a little before the match. They have a good laugh at Nidia competing in dirty sneakers and how bad a dancer she is. Torrie is an experienced participant in these contests and shakes around in her bikini and is declared the winner. Nidia storms off in a huff as Billy and Chuck raise the winner’s hand. Cruiserweight Champion Jamie Noble comes out with Tajiri and is extremely offended that Billy and Chuck would rate his girlfriend so low. He challenges them to a tag team match, which is accepted. Billy and Chuck are in jeans and t-shirts rather than their ring gear but this is official. Noble and Tajiri focus their assault on Billy’s left leg but after a tag to Chuck and a double team Code Red, they win the match. Billy and Chuck have new theme music which is just a generic heavy metal production track. They’ve gone from flamboyant and having tons of character to being powerfully lame and generic. Rico gets to keep the awesome boyband music I guess. After the match, Nidia tries to attack Torrie but pays for it and  Billy holds Nidia down so Torrie can spank her. 

• Backstage, Dawn Marie congratulates Torrie Wilson on her bikini contest victory and says that if she faced her rather than Nidia, she wouldn’t win so easily. Torrie doesn’t really respond and walks off, but that probably sets up that for future. 

• There’s a video package about the press conference for Wrestlemania XIX in Seattle Washington. I plan on that being my last show of this era before changing to somewhere else in wrestling history.

• In the opening match, Rikishi takes on Chavo Guerrero. Rikishi is looking for revenge as last week in a tag team match, Chavo hit Rikishi with a TV camera to help his team win the match. Chavo actually holds his own against the much larger Rikishi and looks strong. He tries to use a TV camera as a weapon again but it’s superkicked back into his face and Rikishi finishes with the Banzai drop - his version is now known as the Rump Shaker - to pick up the win.

Raw - September 30th 2002

Championship Focus

Raw opens with General Manager Eric Bischoff in the ring with, in a nice surprise, Lita. She’s still out of action after neck surgery but it’s always nice to see her. Eric says that tonight on Raw we’ll get three Championship matches with the Women’s, Intercontinental and World Heavyweight titles all on the line tonight. He also says that at No Mercy we’re going to see something unprecedented - at No Mercy, the Intercontinental Champion will face the World Heavyweight Champion in a winner take all match. He isn’t specific but this means that the Intercontinental title is being absorbed into the World title, just like the European and Hardcore titles were absorbed into the IC title previously. He then turns his attention to Lita - in an interview with WWE.com, she was asked which brand is better and she said Smackdown is better than Raw. Bischoff calls her a little bitch and gets in her face and berates and demeans Lita for thinking she’s a star and breaking her neck, making her worthless. She tells him that maybe if he respected his superstars, they’d respect him. He mentions that she’s the new commentator on Sunday Night Heat and tells her she has three minutes to make things right before she’s fired.

On cue, Rosey, Jamal and Rico rush down and are about to beat up poor Lita until Jeff Hardy, Booker T and Goldust run down to make the save. Lita escapes unscathed for now and that sets up Raw’s opening match of Booker T and Goldust vs. Rosey and Jamal. The fans are red hot for hometown boy Booker T and he feeds off it and has the match won with a Scissors Kick on Jamal. Interference from Rico takes out Goldust but the numbers game is too much and a big splash from Jamal wins it for the 3-Minute Warning team. 

Backstage after the match, Coach gets an interview with Rico and the lads and Rico says that Rosey and Jamal were the reasons he came to Raw - to lead this dominant team to Tag Team title victory. Jamal gives the team their name at last, referring to them as the 3-Minute Warning.

Terri interviews Chris Jericho and asks if he’s worried about defending his Intercontinental title against Kane later. Jericho isn’t - knowing that being Intercontinental Champion gets him into the World title match at No Mercy has him feeling glorious and magnificent. He makes a joke about her fake breasts. Ace reporter Gregory Helms shows up and asks Jericho if he really thinks he can beat Kane - Jericho is unimpressed by his antics and says freaks like him and Kane aren’t cool, he is cool. Jericho realises too late that Kane is standing nearby and can hear all his insults. Terri plays with her hair and flirts with Kane a little, returning the kiss that he gave her last week! Terri has the hots for Kane. 

Before Jericho’s title match with Kane, Booker T gets in his face and asks if he called him a loser earlier? Jericho doubles down and says he is a loser - all he does is lose while Jericho has won everything and will continue to win. He cuts Booker T off before he can call him a sucker.

Triple H defends the World Heavyweight Championship against Bubba Ray Dudley, who sets up a table in the corner of the ring as soon as he makes his entrance, spraypainting “HHH” on it. He says the table is reserved for Triple H and cuts a good promo about fighting for people who never had things handed to them, like Triple H had the World title handed to him on September 2nd. This is Bubba trying as hard as he can to move up the card and given his popularity and how many good matches he’s had since the brand split, I can see it.

Triple H now officially has Ric Flair as his manager for all his matches as of tonight. Flair makes the difference, getting in cheap shots and distracting the referee from counting after Bubba hits the Bubba Bomb and has a visual three count. A distraction from Flair leads to the Pedigree and Triple H retains his World title in his third televised defence. Later, Coach goes to interview Triple H but he’s in the shower with two women as Ric Flair gets the champagne flowing - he’s living things up like the Nature Boy of old. Chris Jericho drops by and tells him that he wants to have a word with him about his title defence against Kane later. Triple H has a vested interest given that the winner will be facing Triple H at No Mercy.

Trish Stratus is scheduled to defend the Women’s title against Victoria but as Trish gets ready backstage, Victoria attacks her, tearing her top off. She’s really vicious but tearing her top off just ruins the seriousness of the whole situation as Jerry Lawler squeals like a pig in heat.

That match is next and Victoria is all fired up with a serious look on her face now when she heads to the ring. King puts her mood down to “PMS” because he doesn’t respect women. Trish has put on a new top and walks to the ring all business, dropping her title belt at the top of the ramp and attacking Victoria on the outside to start it aggressively. It’s a really intense fight! They brawl to the outside and Victoria actually hits Trish with a steel chair. It causes the disqualification and JR talks about how crazy she is, while King speculates that this is about a lot more than the title and there is a personal issue here we’re unaware of. I liked this whole segment and match.

As Jericho walks to the ring, Booker T appears and calls him a sucker, finishing his catchphrase after Jericho cut him off before finishing earlier. That’s funny stuff. 

In the main event, one half of the WWE Tag Team Champions Kane takes on Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho. With Eric Bischoff’s decree that the winner will face World Champion Triple H at No Mercy in a title unification match, this has huge stakes. Given that it was RVD who unified the European and Hardcore titles into the Intercontinental title and he’s the one who’s been feuding with Triple H, it's a shame that he wasn’t Intercontinental Champion to complete the trilogy of unification matches. I’ll probably talk more about that at No Mercy. Ric Flair heads down to the ring to watch this match up close, making us all wonder what Jericho was talking about with Triple H earlier - one would assume, asking him to make sure Jericho retains the title to face him at No Mercy rather than take his chances against the Big Red Machine. Sensible enough. Flair gets involved a few times so Kane beats the hell out of him and after a commercial break he’s been ejected from ringside entirely. These two have wrestled lots of times especially in 2000 but this is probably their best match together. Triple H comes down and gives Kane a messy looking spinebuster on the mats outside the ring while the referee is distracted but Kane kicks out back in the ring. The Game keeps the referee distracted so Jericho can use a chair on Kane’s left and he locks in the Walls of Jericho but Kane makes it to the ropes and when Jericho tries to use the chair again he runs right into a big boot and then finally a chokeslam. Kane wins the title in a very good main event despite Triple H and Ric Flair’s efforts.

Kane becomes the 5th man to hold the Tag Team and Intercontinental titles simultaneously (Shawn Michaels, Owen Hart, Ken Shamrock and Triple H were the first four, in that order). That’s two weeks in a row Kane has won a title on Raw and the show ends with him and Triple H staring down, their champion vs. champion match now official. 

Other Happenings

• In the locker room, Christian and Lance Storm bicker and argue over which of them is responsible for them losing the tag team titles last week. Test calls them a pair of babies, and Regal says that Lance needs to focus on his match with Randy Orton and get the Un-Americans back in the win column. 
• Lance Storm takes on Randy Orton, which JR calls a step up in competition from Orton’s debut match and victory over Steven Richards last week. That's fair. Storm uses a roll up using the tights but Randy reverses it by grabbing the tights himself and wins the match. Christian comes out and for some reason steals JR’s hat to wear as he cuts a promo. He says Storm is stupid for losing, almost as stupid as he looks in a cowboy hat like a Texan. That gets big boos. JR is upset that his hat has been stolen! Christian tells Storm to stand back and let him show him how it’s done against Randy, if he has the guts. Orton shows no fear and accepts the challenge and goes into a back to back match against the former Tag Team Champions. Randy guts it out against Christian and wins the match with a sort of neckbreaker - it’s the Overdrive which I’ve commented on before is a move that ever midcarder in this era used. Randy wins two matches in a row and kindly returns JR’s cowboy hat to him as he leaves. There’s more arguments between Storm and Christian after the match.

• Backstage, Eric Bischoff tells off Jeff Hardy for getting involved in his business at the start of the show. As punishment he’s facing Big Show again. He tells Jeff to impress him because he’s starting to think he got stuck with the wrong brother. 

• Backstage, Ric Flair has a chat with Eric Bischoff. He confirms that RVD’s request to wrestle him tonight has been denied but Bischoff won’t say and asks Flair if he’s managed to secure the “former Smackdown talent” that they talked about. Ric assures him that he’s working on it. I wonder who he means?
• Jacqueline acts as referee for the match between Jeff Hardy and Big Show. Her trying to transition into being a referee was legit, but never actually went anywhere. She shows no fear, getting in Big Show’s face when he ignores her count. In a shocker, Jeff dropkicks Big Show off the security wall which sends Show up and over the wall and into the crowd. Jeff manages to get back in the ring and Big Show is counted out, giving Jeff the victory.

• Backstage, Stacy Keibler goes to see Eric Bischoff who has a big spinning wheel with his own face on it. Stacy’s comments aren’t important (they’re about some internet fan vote content involving her and Trish). Bischoff explains that the wheel is for next week’s Raw in Las Vegas - every single match will have a stipulation determined by the spin of the Raw Roulette wheel. Stacy vs. Trish is made for next week and we’ll find out its stipulation then.

• Back in the Un-American locker room, Christian and Storm are still bickering. Regal and Test join in but the four of them are separated. Regal tells them to watch as he and Test show them how a real tag team gets things done.
• Rob Van Dam and Tommy Dreamer are their opponents. This is a good match and is all action with all four works getting changes to shine. There’s some miscommunication by Test and Regal as they accidentally hit each other more than once but a superkick from Van Dam allows Dreamer to roll up Test and win the match for his team. Lance Storm and Christian run down and the four Un-Americans continue to argue and bicker before starting to throw punches. The four of them brawl and split in two with Test and Christian leaving together as Regal and Storm shout abuse at them from ringside. And so ends the ballad of the Un-Americans.

Smackdown - October 3rd 2002

Championship tournament and No Mercy’s Main Event

Smackdown opens with a video by Stephanie McMahon, telling us what we have to look forward to tonight. She announces four major things - Edge vs. Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit vs. Rey Mysterio, Matt Hardy vs. Undertaker in a falls count anywhere match and, most importantly, a tournament to crown new WWE Tag Team Champions exclusive to Smackdown. We get a good look at the title belts, which I really like. I don’t think there will be an official announcement about it but with Smackdown getting WWE Tag Team Champions, that makes the Raw titles the World Tag Team titles from now on. 

The first match of the Tag Team title tournament is the team of Mark Henry and Rikishi vs. Eddie and Chavo Guerrero. They work on Mark’s leg and after a sneaky chairshot to the knee from Chavo, Eddie locks him in a tight submission hold which forces a tap out. The Guerreros advance to the semi finals of the tournament.

In their locker room, Brock Lesnar watches him busting Undertaker open last week over and over. Heyman says that he’s been arguing with Stephanie McMahon all week but she won’t listen to reason - Brock Lesnar has to face Undertaker again for the title at No Mercy but won’t tell him what kind of match it is. Matt Hardy is also in the room and promises them that he’ll take Undertaker out in their falls count anywhere match so that Brock doesn’t have to worry about Undertaker anymore. Might be over-promising a little there Matt. Undertaker pummels Matt, beating him up all around the ring and almost chokeslamming him through the announce desk.

Matt escapes with a low blow and after they brawl through the back, Matt tries to run away. He can’t escape and so climbs a fence and up onto some shelving units. It’s a distraction and a trap - Brock Lesnar attacks Undertaker from behind. The American Badass kicks his ass too but Matt Hardy helps out again and after an F5 (onto some popcorn bags for safety), Matt Hardy actually pins the Undertaker! He’s about to leave with Heyman and Lesnar but when the WWE Champion sees Undertaker crawling to his feet, he grabs a gas canister and hits Undertaker in the hand and arm. He screams in pain and Lesnar has a sinister smirk leaving his No Mercy challenger laying and in pain for the second week in a row. Later we find out that Undertaker’s right hand is broken.

Mark Lloyd interviews Kurt Angle and asks if he regrets the nasty things he said about Rey Mysterio considering Rey won last week’s main event - Kurt says he’s the best so he never has to apologise for anything. He didn’t lose - Benoit did. Benoit is a regular person but Kurt? Kurt is as close to pure perfection as a person can be. His interview is interrupted by Edge who says he’s not bald, and reminds him that he shaved his head. Kurt says he’s been waiting for this moment since he shaved his head and gets in a sucker punch. That match is next and despite Kurt’s claims of perfection, the fans still rain You Suck chants down on him. This is another strong match between two men who’ve battled multiple times on PPV and off in 2002 already. In PPV singles matches, Edge actually leads Angle 2 victories to 1.

Kurt grinds Edge down with an endless facelock into an endless chinlock and then an endless bearhug but the fans stay solidly into the match and behind Edge. The referee gets knocked down by a mistimed Edge Spear so when he hits the Edgucution DDT there’s no referee to count. There’s still no referee to count and when one finally arrives its after Kurt gives Edge a low blow and then Angle slam. Edge kicks out and escapes an ankle lock to the ropes. Kurt hits a superplex but Edge grabs Kurt’s ankles, turning it into a roll up. There’s a three count but the second referee as well as the original ref who has now woken back up argue over who actually won the match and after a commercial break, the match has been restarted. The original referee Mike Chioda actually punched replacement ref Mike Sparks in the face during their argument about the match outcome.

As the match continues, Chris Benoit slowly walks down to the ring to watch this match up close with a smirk on his face. His presence majorly distracts Kurt Angle as they continue to argue over which of them is the better wrestler. Kurt gets frustrated at being unable to put Edge away and goes to get a steel chair. Benoit stops him from using it and that leads to a Spear and a victory for Edge in what ended up being a very long match. Benoit laughs hysterically at having cost Angle the match and when the Olympic hero gets backstage, he marches around shouting Benoit’s name, finding him and trying to attack in the locker room. They’re help apart until Smackdown General Manager Stephanie McMahon arrives. She tells them that they need to get along and books them as a tag team in the tag team tournament next week, warning them that if they don’t get along they’ll both be suspended for a year! Kurt gets a final cheap shot in on Benoit.

In the WWE Champion’s locker room, Paul Heyman pumps up his client talking about how he ended Hulkamania, took the title from The Rock and now broke Undertaker’s hand. Matt Hardy interrupts to talk about how great he is for beating Undertaker all by himself. He says that since Undertaker probably can’t compete at No Mercy, he should be the number one contender and get a WWE Championship match. Heyman agrees as Matt goes to talk to Stephanie about it and after he's gone, Heyman tells Brock that Matt would kill him and the two of them laugh about the very idea of it. 

Billy and Chuck have gotten very generic since losing Rico but do still have their boyband theme song after not using it last week. Weirdly tonight they aren’t in matching ring gear. Maybe Chuck lost his? Their opponents are the odd couple of Reverend D-Von and Faarooq, which is a shock to everyone. D-Von’s partner was supposed to be Batista, despite their issues. So where is Batista? Billy asks Faarooq why he’s teaming with the Reverend but instead of answering he throws a punch to start the match. Hey, a chance to win a championship will make a man do funny things. At least they acknowledge how weird and out of the blue this team is rather than ignore it. In a shocker, Faarooq hits a spinebuster on Billy and D-Von gets the cover to advance in the tag team title tournament. 

Backstage as Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman are leaving the building, Stephanie stops them to confirm that while Undertaker’s hand is broken, he has every intention of still competing in their WWE Championship match at No Mercy. She wants to name the stipulation too and after Heyman laughs about a one arm tied behind your back match and Lesnar jokes about a thumb war match, she tells them it’s Hell in a Cell! That wipes the smile off both their faces.

In the main event, Rey Mysterio faces Chris Benoit in what they billed as the “first time anywhere”. I believe that’s true and despite both being in ECW and WCW, these two men never wrestled in either place. Rey is lightning fast and goes for multiple roll ups with Benoit kicking out each time. He goes for suplexes which Rey also counters and keeps the match moving with a big dive to the outside. After a heated back and forth, Kurt Angle runs down to the ring and hangs Benoit up on the ropes sending him spinning into a hurricanrana and a roll up. Rey Mysterio pins Chris Benoit for the second week in a row. He leaves quickly and after getting in each other’s faces, Angle takes Benoit down into an ankle lock, which is countered into a Crossface. Referees and agents fill the ring to separate the two and hold them apart while Michael Cole reminds us that next week these two men are tag team partners! 

Other Happenings

• Torrie Wilson arrives at the arena with her elderly father Al. It’s not her real dad, obviously. She introduces him to Billy and Chuck. Torrie’s opponent in tonight’s bikini contest Dawn Marie comes over and flirts with her dad before sarcastically wishing Torrie luck later.
• Ahead of the bikini contest later in the show, Dawn Marie goes to see Torrie’s dad and asks what he thinks of her bikini. What is she up to? I don’t want bikini contests to become a weekly thing but with Raw having the women’s title exclusively now there’s nothing for the very small number of girls on Smackdown to actually do. At least Vince McMahon isn’t around anymore. Unsurprisingly, both women look pretty incredible. Torrie is wearing a flesh coloured bikini which is much smaller than last week’s. There’s no judges this time, the fans get to decide. Dawn gets boos, Torrie gets cheers so she wins. Dawn attacks Torrie afterwards and throws her out of the ring. A sore loser.

• Jamie Noble defends the Cruiserweight Championship against Crash Holly who has apparently racked up some wins on Velocity since jumping ship from Raw to earn this title match. This is a short match. Too short to be anything other than “fine” honestly - Noble wins with a roll up, grabbing the ropes for additional leverage.

Raw - September 7th 2002

Raw Roulette! Tables, Ladders and Chairs come to Raw

It’s Raw Roulette!

Eric Bischoff has a wheel which represents everything Las Vegas has to offer - greed, lust, violence, excitement. Every match tonight will have a stipulation decided by a spin of the wheel. Bischoff spins and it lands on Steel Cage! I love Las Vegas (legitimately, I got married there and have been three times, aiming for my 4th and 5th trips both next year!)

The steel cage match opens the show and features Booker T vs. The Big Show. That’s a hell of an opener. Lillian Garcia specifies that this cage match can only be won by escape. This is a fairly slow brawl which Show could have easily won more than once but wanted to keep the beating going. The crowd is red hot for this match and Booker scores with a Scissors Kick, followed by a second off the top rope! That was really cool. He climbs out over the top and Booker T wins a short, fun cage match which the fans loved. Booker is about to give us a victory Spinarooni on the outside when Chris Jericho runs down and attacks Booker from behind, running him into the outside of the cage and hammering him with punches and busting Booker open. 

The second spin of the Raw Roulette wheel determines the challengers for the World Tag Team Championships tonight. Bischoff calls Kane greedy for being a tag champion, Intercontinental Champion and chasing the World title at No Mercy. The wheel lands on TLC - Tables, Ladders and Chairs. Eric hasn’t decided who their opponents and challengers will be yet and sarcastically wishes Kane luck. “Luck is for losers” Later, Bischoff calls Bubba Ray Dudley, Christian and Jeff Hardy into his office. No one knows more about TLC than them so he lets them pick their own partners for the four team TLC match for the World Tag titles. None of them want to do it, really hammering home how dangerous the match is. He threatens to suspend them if they don’t participate. 

Backstage, Terri asks Chris Jericho why he attacked Booker T like that? He says he’s sick of being overlooked and mocked. Two weeks ago Goldust said Fozzy sucks! Last week, Booker called him a sucker which got in his head and cost him the Intercontinental Championship. He says that any jackass who insults him from now on will get the same treatment - a beating from the King of the World. 

Spin of the wheel number 3 lands on a Blindfold match - that determines Triple H’s opponent tonight! He’s outraged at how dangerous it is to wrestle when you can’t see. Flair calms Triple H down and tells him to leave, and then shows off two women he’s arranged for Eric Bischoff later. That’s a bribe so he gives Triple H an easy opponent. Triple H also ominously promised that after tonight, Kane’s life would “never be the same”

Triple H’s opponent in this non-title Blindfold match is D’Lo Brown. D’Lo is my boy, I’m always happy to see him on TV but I don’t like the implication that he’s an easy opponent for Triple H. D’Lo smartly insists on Triple H putting his blindfold on first - he knows The Game will jump him. The two put bags on their heads and fumble around the ring trying to get a hold of each other, just barely missing each other and wildly swinging with punches. This is extremely entertaining and the fans laugh and as Triple H shouts abuse at no one - D’Lo had already moved - and then swings wildly. D’Lo almost hits the referee. Flair distracts the referee, Triple H removes his blindfold to hit a Pedigree and steals the win. Loved this. 

Terri interviews Christian and asks if he has a partner yet. He confirms the death of the Un-Americans and says he won every TLC match but one. The one he didn’t win? That was won by Chris Jericho who enters and offers to be his partner. Kane took his title last week, so this week he’ll take one of his. They shake hands. 

Bubba Ray Dudley goes and looks for a partner of his own. He wants Tommy Dreamer, who accepts. Spike Dudley is a little disappointed - he wanted it to be him. Tommy steps aside. Family first. So it’s Bubba Ray and Spike Dudley as team number three. Later in an interview with Coach, Jeff Hardy casually reveals Rob Van Dam as his partner, making the match full and official.

This is, amazingly, only the fourth TLC match in WWE history. This is the first one to ever take place on Raw. Terri interviews Kane backstage and implies they’re now dating, or at least sleeping together. She asks Kane if he thinks being in such a dangerous match two weeks before No Mercy will put him at a disadvantage. Kane says that this is the first time in his life he’s ever been happy, which is very sad. He knows he can do it, and he has the fans behind him. He’s mid-rant about how no one can stop him when Coach interrupts to let him know that Triple H and Ric Flair are beating up the Hurricane. Kane runs off but he’s too late - the World Champion and the Nature Boy have beaten Hurricane up so badly he now can’t compete tonight. What will Kane do? And is this the warning that Triple H gave Kane earlier about changing his life forever? Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam enter first, followed by The Dudleyz who are the only team to come out together. The death of the Un-Americans means we get Christian’s awesome theme song for the first time in months and he’s changed his ring gear so a red singlet. He was due an upgrade. His partner Chris Jericho is last but what about Kane and Hurricane? Kane comes out alone to start the match and is now defending the Tag Team titles solo. This is chaotic and I don’t think I can do anywhere close to justice to how awesome this match is. You don’t want to read me describe it, you want to watch it yourself and you can!

In a little bit of behind the scenes, when Jericho gives Bubba Ray a bulldog off the ladder, he gives him what he calls the worst concussion of his entire life. He couldn’t remember anything and had to be led through the rest of the match including Jericho having to literally explain how to climb a ladder. When Bubba got backstage he was still confused and refused medical treatment, screaming abuse and swear words at Vince McMahon until finally being forced into the ambulance. He’d also forgotten that his mother had died the previous year so his friend Tommy Dreamer was forced to have to explain to him that his mum was dead over and over as he kept forgetting and asking where his parents were, crying like a baby. It sounds like a very upsetting night for everyone involved but thankfully Bubba can laugh about it now. After a 20 minute car crash, Kane chokeslams Jericho off a ladder to single handedly retain the World Tag Team Championships. This was incredible. 

Kane is about to celebrate and cue up his pyro, but World Heavyweight Champion Triple H and Ric Flair come out onto the stage. Triple H tells Kane that while he said he might be the happiest hes ever been but not everyone deserves to be happy - he asks how happy is “Katie Vick” ? Kane looks shocked. Triple H says that 10 years ago, Kane killed Katie Vick and is a murderer. The camera zooms in on Kane’s shocked, sad face and that’s how Raw ends. An amazing episode of Raw all the way through, and while we’ll talk a lot more about Katie Vick next week and No Mercy, that sentence begins a storyline which most people still list as one of the worst things in WWE history. So it’s noteworthy if nothing else! 

Other Happenings

• The fourth spin decides the stipulation for William Regal vs. Goldust. It lands on “Las Vegas Showgirl” which Regal assumes means he gets one of the girls with Bischoff. He corrects him - they have to wrestle dressed as Las Vegas Showgirls! 

• There’s a video promoting the arrival of Batista - he’s moving from Smackdown to Raw it seems. The video is a lot more serious than his semi-religious presentation so far. He lifts heavy weights in a gym set to pumping rock music. Later in the show, there’s a video promoting Randy Orton too. It’s in the style of an old school American football hype package, talking about how amazing he is. “A legend in the making” which is a little full of himself. Might he be transitioning to an arrogant heel? He’s live at The World in New York City and signs autographs and hugs fans. 

• For the Showgirls match, Regal hams it up amazingly. He has a really hard time walking in high heels and pulls faces, tugs at his wedgie and I’m confident Goldust’s laughter was legit. He’s so amazingly funny. The scowls at the fans as they laugh and point. The Un-Americans are no more but Lance Storm and Regal have retained a friendship so Storm runs down and distracts the referee so Regal can knock Goldust out with a pair of brass knuckles to win the match. Hilariously he goes back to looking smug and refined after his victory, all while still dressed as a Las Vegas showgirl.

• Bischoff spins the wheel to decide the stipulation for Trish and Stacy Keibler’s match. It lands on “Blank on a pole” so he makes it a paddle on a pole match. He spins again - double or nothing - and cheats, making it land on bra and panties. So it's a bra and panties, paddle on a pole match for the women’s title. I’m confident you don’t want or need me to recap that blow by blow and if you’re really interested I’m sure the video is on YouTube. Trish does debut her Lil Kim theme song for this match which she’s still using 20+ years later. Trish strips Stacy to her underwear to win the match and retain the title, but sore loser Stacy goes and gets the paddle off the pole and tries to attack her with it. Trish gets the upper hand and spanks Stacy with the paddle instead. She gets no time to celebrate when Victoria comes down to attack her too. Stacy runs off and Victoria and Trish have a heated brawl at ringside, which the bigger and stronger Victoria wins. JR and King speculate what has caused this rage that we’ve seen from her last week and this? It’s a really vicious beating and Victoria destroys Trish. When she gets backstage, Coach asks Victoria why she’s so angry at Trish? Victoria asks if she has Trish’s attention now? She’s going to take her women’s title and she tells Coach to ask Trish about her past. She’s hurt Victoria in the past and now it’s her turn to get hurt.

• Jerry Lawler has asked Eric Bischoff for a match tonight, something he’s talked about all through the show wondering if it’ll be a puppies match or a HLA match, whatever those would be? JR wipes the smile off his face by pointing out it could turn out to be a hair vs. hair match, or an Inferno match. His opponent is Steven Richards and after a spin of the wheel, it’s a “it’s legal in Nevada” match. I have no idea what that means and nor does anyone else until the Godfather’s music hits and he leads an army of ladies to the ring. There’s lots of things which are only legal in Nevada including gambling and prostitution which is what they’re getting at I assume. Godfather says that the winner of this match gets a ride on “the train”. He means the Ho Train, which they’ve been careful not to actually say. I guess calling them Hoes is very 1999. The fans chant “Jerry” which means sadly this audience has just turned heel on me. I want Richards to kick his ass. King wins with a roll up which means he gets a night with I guess as many of Godfather’s ladies as he wants. God he’s going to be insufferable for the rest of the show isn’t he? Thankfully my luck is in as King just doesn’t return and so JR calls the main event solo. Someone up there is looking out for me. 

• Test goes one on one with Al Snow, which is a big surprise as he’s supposed to be a Smackdown superstar. What kind of match is it though? Bischoff appears on the titantron and spins the wheel - it’s a Las Vegas street fight! It’s basically a classic hardcore match with Snow and Test hitting each other with trash cans and lids and stop signs. Test breaks out the old bowling ball and takes a moment to put on his bowling shift. He uses the bowling ball as a weapon and that's enough to win it for another one of my boys. This has been a good night for me! 

Smackdown - October 10th 2002

Infidelity and the Tag Team Titles

At the top of the show, Undertaker is showing waiting in the parking lot for the arrival of WWE Champion Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. In the arena, Matt Hardy heads to the ring and brags about his victories over Undertaker and generally talk about how great he is. Undertaker must have got wind of Matt and so he heads towards the ring as Matt warns him that if he keeps coming, he'll make him regret it. Undertaker is unintimidated and beats the hell out of Matt, busting him open using his cast as a weapon. Undertaker does continually sell his hand and Matt puts up a bit of a fight! Undertaker swings with a big punch but misses and hits the ring post, making his hand worse and the pain allows Matt to finally escape the beating. 

In Stephanie McMahon’s office she pleads with Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit to get along and work together. They are the best athletes and competitors on Smackdown and she needs them to make Smackdown’s tag team division and new champions legitimate. She says that if they don’t get along and work together she will suspend them without pay. Kurt sucks up to her and thanks her for giving him the chance, and says he’d win no matter who his partner is. Benoit says he has history as a tag team champion so Kurt needs to follow his lead. They bicker like children over who’s going to leave the office first and stubbornly both refuse to leave.

Elsewhere in the Smackdown WWE Tag Team Championship tournament, Rey Mysterio and Edge take on the team of Tajiri and Cruiserweight Champion Jamie Noble. Nidia arrives during Rey’s interview with Funaki and propositions him in Spanish. He’s not interested and appears to insult her. I don’t know what they were saying but its all clear from the context. She runs off and demands that Noble stand up for her. They start to bicker about showing a lack of respect for each other and a member of security tries to calm down the domestic dispute. Noble gets aggressive and so he and Nidia are ejected from the building apparently leaving Tajiri with no tag team partner! 

Later, Eddie and Chavo are riding high after their victory over Rikishi this week and Mark Henry last week. Chris Benoit finally leaves Stephanie’s office and runs into them and they ask if he saw their performance. Eddie teases Benoit about “getting in trouble with the principal” and then wind him up, saying that there's a rumour that Kurt WANTS to get suspended so he can train for the Olympics so Benoit better watch his back and be very careful. Kurt might want to go down and take Benoit with him. Kurt leaves the office behind them and gets a laugh with “word up my Chicano friends” to the Guerreros. He assumes they were all talking about him and threatens to beat it out of Benoit if he won’t tell him.

Benoit and Angle’s opponents in the Tag Team tournament are John Cena and Billy Kidman. They argue over who’s going to start the match and it ends up being Benoit. Really Kurt should focus - all he needs is a Tag Team title to become a Grand Slam Champion having already won the WWE, Intercontinental and European titles. Cena and Kidman put up a really good fight and have this won after a shooting star press on Benoit but Kurt breaks it up. The match in general is very good - Billy Kidman was an exceptional wrestler - but an Angle slam puts him down and Benoit locks him in the Crossface to win the match and advance in the tournament. There was some miscommunication and when Cena knocked Angle out of the ring, he thought it was Benoit so the two of them argued and got in each other’s faces rather than celebrate the victory. 

There’s a video package about how great Matt Hardy is, which I can only assume he made himself. It’s pretty funny and a good introduction to his new heel gimmick.

WWE Champion Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman arrive with an unknown attractive woman and head down to the ring to address the crowd and presumably the Hell in a Cell match with the Undertaker at No Mercy. Heyman recaps the whole situation so far and hands the mic to “Tracy” but before she can speak, Undertaker comes out and marches down to the ring to kick some ass. Heyman and Lesnar bail out of the ring but Tracy stays behind, screaming “how could you Mark?” and reveals that they’ve been sleeping together for three months and she had no idea he was married or that his wife was pregnant. She says she doesn’t care that he’s The Undertaker and doesn’t watch wrestling. He apparently made her promise not to take the relationship public and then speaks to the camera and apologises to Sara - Undertaker’s wife - because she had no idea was married. He snatches the mic from her and says he has no idea who she is. She slaps him across the face and leaves.

After a commercial break, Heyman and Lesnar are leaving with Tracy. As Heyman hits on her, Stephanie stops them and breaks the news that Brock Lesnar has a match tonight. With Jamie Noble out of the way, he’ll now team with Tajiri in the Tag Team Championship tournament. Paul Heyman isn’t happy about it and refuses, calling Smackdown and unsafe working environment. Stephanie says that this tag team division is vital for Smackdown and so the match will take place and Undertaker will be banned from ringside - in fact, if Undertaker interferes in tonight’s match then the Hell in a Cell match is cancelled. Later, Undertaker is on the phone to his wife explaining that he’s never seen the woman before in his life. It seems like Sara believes Tracy, Heyman and Lesnar. 

Backstage, Chavo Guerrero runs to Benoit complaining that he’s been attacked and that Eddie and Angle are fighting! Benoit goes with him and Chavo sends him into a dark locker room, closing the door behind and holding it closed while we hear lots of banging and fighting inside. After a few moments, Eddie comes out with a dented steel chair and laughs about how “Kurt Angle” just got the job done.

Backstage before the Tag team match, Brock Lesnar asks for Paul Heyman’s cellphone and calls Undertaker’s wife, taunting her about her marital issues and saying he’s glad they could share another special moment. Heyman laughs incredulously that his client had the nerves to call Undertaker’s wife! 

In the main event, one of the weirder tag team matches in history as Edge and Rey Mysterio take on Tajiri and WWE Champion Brock Lesnar. Tajiri lets Lesnar start the match but Brock doesn’t want to be here - he wants to escape the arena after provoking the Undertaker and getting in his head again tonight. Lesnar dominates and there’s some humour as Tajiri tags himself in to work over Rey Mysterio. There’s some miscommunication and Tajiri is the undoing with Edge scoring a Spear to win the match and advance in the tournament. Lesnar is furious and lays out Edge on the outside, effortlessly throws Rey from the outside back into the ring. He drills Tajiri and Rey with a pair of F5s but Undertaker runs to the ring and fights, punching Lesnar with his cast which sends the WWE Champion fleeing from the ring. Lesnar makes his getaway with Heyman as Undertaker shows off the crack Lesnar’s head opened up in his cast. It’s all stained with Matt Hardy’s blood from earlier too. 

Other Happenings

• In the opening match, Rikishi takes on Eddie Guerrero (accompanied by his tag team partner and nephew Chavo). Chavo gets involved and pays for it as he and Eddie get a double Stink Face. The referee is distracted getting Chavo out of the ring allowing Eddie to use a steel chair on the big man’s knee and lock in the Lasso from El Paso - the same submission he used on Mark Henry last week - to win the match by submission. 
• Backstage, Torrie Wilson sifts through all her underwear because Dawn Marie has challenged her to a lingerie contest tonight. She’s surprised when her dad shows up and hides the revealing outfits from him, leading him away. 
• Torrie gets ready for her lingerie contest and asks her dad to stay backstage and not watch because she feels weird about him seeing her like that. After she leaves, Dawn Marie approaches and like last week, shows off her outfit and asks what he thinks before giving him a little kiss on the cheek. The contest is next, once again hosted by Tazz. As tedious as I’m starting to find these segments which are basically the same every week, I am grateful Jerry Lawler isn’t on Smackdown anymore. For what it's worth, I think they both look way better in lingerie than they did in bikinis. Once again, Torrie gets the loudest cheers so she wins. Dawn offers a handshake but Torrie refuses it this time. Backstage later, as Al waits for his daughter to wash up so they can go for dinner, Dawn approaches him again and this time gives him her phone number as well as a magazine full of revealing photos of herself.

• Billy, accompanied by Chuck, takes on Reverend D-Von, with Faarooq. Billy and Chuck have now reverted to the generic theme music they had two weeks ago. They can’t make up their mind. Faarooq is now known as Ron Simmons, which is his real name obviously. Billy wins, but of course D-Von and Simmons have the last laugh because they advanced in the tag tournament last week.

Raw - October 14th 2002

I Know What Kane Did Last Summer

Raw opens with Hurricane and Kane defending the World Tag Team titles against Chris Jericho and Christian. Before the match, Coach tries to interview Kane and asks if he plans to address what Triple H accused him of last week (murdering someone named Katie Vick) but he screams that its none of Coach’s business. Hurricane has reverted back to his old ring gear with his torso covered up, but does now have a combined entrance and music with Kane. Booker T attacks Jericho during his entrance as revenge for last week’s assault which gives Kane and Hurricane the early advantage when the match does begin. JR and King speculate about Kane and whether he will address the very serious allegations made by Triple H last week. King is, and this won’t shock you, absolutely infuriating, refusing to let it lie and assuming Kane is guilty already. The fans chant “we want Kane” and this past month might be the most popular he ever was. The “freaks are cool” era. Kane fights with Christian on the outside and Jericho rolls up Hurricane with his feet on the ropes to steal the Tag Team titles! This is Christian’s 9th Tag Team title with his 3rd different partner which must make him the greatest tag team wrestler of all time. 

Backstage as Jericho and Christian celebrate, referees and officials work to keep Booker T and Goldust from attacking the new champions. General Manager Eric Bischoff congratulates the new champions and then settles Booker and Goldust by giving them a Tag Team title match of their own at No Mercy. Booker promises that he’ll kick both their asses at No Mercy.

Backstage, Spike Dudley, Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam discuss having just barely survived TLC last week and Bubba Ray’s serious concussion which I mentioned last week. Eric Bischoff shows up and applauds them for their efforts and for even still being standing after last week’s main event. He shows us a video package replaying the carnage, which was incredible.

Bischoff dismisses Spike and Jeff and tells RVD that at No Mercy he’ll get his hands on Ric Flair for what he did at Unforgiven. Van Dam accepts but for tonight, Bischoff wants Triple H to compete tonight just like Kane did because he’s a very fair man. He wants RVD vs. Triple H in a Canadian Lumberjack match. Basically a lumberjack match where they all have leather straps. RVD is already beaten up after last week and this will only soften him up more. 

In the World Champion’s locker room, he complains to Ric Flair about it and how many men want to take a shot at the champ with leather straps. Flair is just as angry because he has to face him at No Mercy. Triple H promises Flair he’ll take out RVD tonight for him and says since Bischoff has ruined his night, he’ll ruin some nights of his own. Kane has until the end of the next match to tell everyone about Katie Vick and what happened or he’ll go out and do it himself. 

Backstage, Kane throws a temper tantrum about what Triple H said. Hurricane tries to calm him down but Kane wants to be alone. Terri goes to see him and sits with Kane, telling him that in this frame of mind he’ll never beat Triple H at No Mercy and he needs to tell his story and clear his mind. After a commercial break, Kane is out in the ring to do just that. Katie Vick was a friend of his who died but it was an accident, and he is NOT a murderer. Annoyingly the Canadian crowd loudly WHAT Kane. She was his friend when he first started wrestling and after a party one night when she was drunk, he drove her home. An animal jumped out in front of the car, he swerved to avoid it and crashed into a tree. Kane broke his arm, but Katie was killed instantly. It was an accident. That sounds fair enough to me. Kane says he’s tortured by it and always has been. He’s about to leave but Triple H comes out and taunts him. He tells Kane to tell the whole truth - he was drinking too. He says there were empty beer cans in the car and that they found Kane’s semen during the autopsy. Katie Vick wasn’t Kane’s friend - he was madly in love with her, but she didn’t love him back. Triple H lays it out - did he force himself on her while she was alive, or did he wait until she was dead and do it to her then? The segment just ends and goes to commercial break. Afterwards, Kane is leaving the arena and Hurricane stops him and asks him to stay. Kane says he has to leave or he’ll do something he’ll regret for the rest of his life. I’m not sure what the reaction to all of this was backstage as I assumed Jerry Lawler would be horrific after this segment but he didn’t even mention it initially. 

Superstars in the back all retrieve their leather straps and Booker T is excited to whip Triple H which puts a big smile on Tommy Dreamer and Spike’s faces

Terri interviews Triple H and asks him why he is doing this to Kane? Triple H calls Kane a murderer and says this information was all given to him - he didn’t go digging for it. He’s just reporting it and doesn’t want to wrestle a murderer. He trips over his lines a little and seems to forget what he’s saying. He walks off and then “oh and one more thing” comes back to talk about beating RVD tonight. 

Big Show and Booker T have had a busy night already and square off in a Falls Count Anywhere match. Big Show asked for this match after Booker beat him in a cage last week. The two men fight through the back and when they get backstage, bizarrely in the background Triple H is driving a forklift through the backstage area. What is he up to? King has finally engaged with the storyline and he and JR spend a lot of this match bickering about whether Kane is or isn’t a murderer. Booker and Big Show have an entertaining brawl that goes into the women’s locker room and barge in on Trish Stratus in the shower. That poor girl can’t get a break. Booker gets a nearfall in the shower with Trish looking on, but is then hit from behind by Chris Jericho with a steel chair which gives Big Show the victory. 

In the next segment we find out what Triple H was doing with the forklift - he’s used it to barricade a locker room door and smugly tells Coach that he thinks a lot of the lumberjacks aren’t going to make it down to the ring.

After a commercial break we find out what he meant. The ring is surrounded by lumberjacks with leather straps but they’re all heels. RVD starts the match aggressively and cannot afford to be thrown out of the ring, but he is and he gets whipped just as you’d expect. JR calls all of Triple H’s words and revelations mind games and he fully believes Kane. King continually goads him about whether it was or wasn’t an accident and goes fully with Triple H’s accusations believing that Kane is indeed a murderer. The fans loudly boo as Triple H is knocked out of the ring and the lumberjacks help him up instead of whipping him so Van Dam dives out onto all of them. As the match continues and Triple H has a huge unfair advantage, Booker T leads the babyface lumberjacks to the ring to even the odds. They all brawl around the ring, hitting each other with straps which evens things up. RVD scores with a diving kick off the top rope and follows with a Five Star Frog Splash. Earl Hebner - the worst referee in the world - is outside the ring trying to stop the lumberjacks for some reason and so Van Dam can’t win. Flair hits him with the World title belt and then gets the referee into the ring so Triple H can win the match. Kane returns and runs to the ring, getting his hands on Triple H and Flair. It would have been more impactful if his pyro had exploded. Flair gives Kane a low blow and he and The Game escape but Kane has snapped and plans Nowinski, D’Lo and Rico with chokeslams one after another. He’s attacked by Rosey and Jamal and Triple H starts heading back to the ring now that he’d have the advantage but stops when the big red machine fights them off too and plants both of them with chokeslams. Kane cues his pyro and Raw ends with Triple H hugging his World title belt to his chest, terrified of losing it at No Mercy. 

Ghosts from Trish’s Past

Coach interviews Victoria and asks her about her history with Trish Stratus. She explains that they’ve known each other for years and were approached by WWE at the same time. She accuses Trish of leaving her behind and abandoning her when she left for WWE, as well as sleeping her way to the top. Trish shows up and, without speaking, slaps Victoria in the face. She just smiles.

Stacy Keibler acts as special guest referee for a tag team match between Molly Holly and Victoria vs. WWE Women’s Champion Trish Stratus and Jacqueline. This is physical and the girls are working hard to make this serious but the fans are too busy chanting HLA to take any notice. Victoria shows off some impressive power moves. Jackie has the match won after a nice spinning heel kick on Molly but Stacy feigns an injured shoulder and won’t count. She gets knocked down and a second referee runs down and counts the three after a DDT, giving Trish and Jackie the victory. The fighting isn’t over and Victoria tackles Trish and the two roll around throwing punches and pulling at hair until they’re finally separated by the referees. . 

Other Happenings

• Eric Bischoff heads down to the ring to address the live crowd. He assures everyone that regardless of Kane’s state of mind, he will be at No Mercy to compete in the winner take all, Intercontinental and World title unification match. He explains the specifics and that officially this will be the final time we see the Intercontinental title, absorbed into the World title. With that in mind, he brings out the first ever Intercontinental Champion Pat Patterson. He’s from Montreal, and that’s where Raw is taking place so this is all very fitting. Pat speaks to the crowd in Canadian-French and the crowd loudly boos when Bischoff asks him to speak English. If you can’t see the end of this segment coming a mile off then you haven’t been paying attention. Bischoff seems to read our mind and actually says this is not intended to be a 3-Minute Warning situation and introduces a video package about the history of the Intercontinental Championship

It turns out Bischoff was lying of course and despite Patterson seeing them coming and throwing a punch he’s attacked by Rosey and Jamal who flatten him with a Samoan drop. Patterson’s long time Stooge buddy Gerry Brisco runs down to try and make the save but the two old men are no match for the 400lbs Samoans and they destroy them both, ending with a big splash off the top rope. The Big Show does run down with a leather strap and fights them off, but its too little too late - he could have made the save before the splash! D’Lo Brown runs down too - both these men are former victims of the 3-Minute Warning attack, as is Jeff Hardy who joins in! Rosey and Jamal are forced to run away as Jeff and D’Lo check on Patterson and Brisco in the ring.

• Tough Enough trainer Al Snow chats to Tough Enough alumni Christopher Nowinski and tells him he’s proud to see everything he’s achieving now as a WWE Superstar. Nowinski says it's no thanks to Al and mocks him for losing earlier. That leads to Nowinski in the ring for a match with Tommy Dreamer. Al Snow comes down to ringside to watch this match up close and stops Dreamer from using a kendo stick as a weapon. The distraction allows Nowinski to hit a full nelson slam and win the match. That WAS thanks to Al Snow. 

• There’s another video about how great Randy Orton is, this time focused on how handsome he is and how much the girls love him. That leads into Randy Orton coming out onto the stage for an interview with JR. He refers to himself in the third person and informs us that he’s torn his shoulder and while a normal person would be out 9 - 12 months but he will only be gone 3 - 4. He says it will pain him to be away for so long so he brings up an email address where the fans can send their well wishes and get well soon messages to as he recuperates. The Canadian crowd starts to sing the goodbye song at him, drowning him out. They’ve done him a favour because he is slowly morphing into a cocky conceited heel. It’s good stuff - he’s showing a lot of personality. He casually insults Bret Hart too which gets him plenty of boos and JR shakes his head in disappointment.

• Lance Storm goes one on one with Al Snow. William Regal enters with Storm and then joins commentary to watch the match. Regal eventually gets sick of just watching and slips to ringside, handing the brass knuckles to Storm who uses them to pick up the win.
• Jeff Hardy who is all banged up after TLC takes on Rico. It’s a pretty nothing match which Rico wins, taking advantage of Jeff’s battered body.

Smackdown - October 17th 2002

To Cast or Not to Cast? 

The Undertaker addresses the accusations made last week by Tracy on behalf of Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. He says he does know Tracy and she was “one of many women” who he dated many years ago. He hasn’t seen her for about 7 years and is not a cheater. He tells Heyman and Lesnar that the hell they’ve put him and Sara through the past week is nothing compared to the hell he’s going to put Brock through at No Mercy in the cell.

Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman lead Tracy to Stephanie McMahon’s office - why is she back again, and what information does she have for the General Manager? She rants to Stephanie about how she last slept with Undertaker 10 days ago and that he’s a liar. Stephanie isn’t interested and kicks her out of the building. Heyman then takes over and tells her that people like Brock Lesnar and Matt Hardy are the future of Smackdown but Undertaker is in the twilight of his career and doesn’t deserve to be protected. He calls Undertaker’s cast a dangerous weapon and he doesn’t want him to be allowed to wear it inside Hell in a Cell. Later, Undertaker speaks to Stephanie and continues to call Tracy a liar. None of this is true, and he’s outraged that he might need to take the cast off his broken hand before Hell in a Cell. So what if he’s using it as a weapon? That’s allowed inside Hell in a Cell anyway. He smashes up her office.

WWE Champion Brock Lesnar goes one on one with Chuck Palumbo. He’s regained his surname and is once again Chuck Palumbo. He’s shaved the blonde out of his hair and has generic music. Michael Cole explains that Billy Gunn suffered a very serious knee injury this past Monday at a non-televised event and will be out of action for quite a few months. I’ve mentioned before that I plan on stopping at Wrestlemania XIX which means we won’t see Billy again - he didn’t return until June 2003. Brock wins quite a long match for the era and circumstances with an F5 and is immediately attacked by Undertaker who hammers him with punches using his cast. Taker even swipes at referees and agents, busting Lesnar open. Heyman manages to get his client out of the ring and they make a quick getaway as Undertaker screams in pain about his hand. Using it as a weapon hurts him just as much as the person he’s punching but Cole seems to think busting Lesnar open with it here proves he shouldn’t be allowed to use it at Hell in a Cell.

In the trainers office, Brock is being stitched up and he tells Paul he needs to go and talk to Stephanie McMahon and MAKE her make Undertaker take his cast off before Hell in a Cell. 

After a commercial break, he does exactly that and after more trademark Heyman hyperbole and ranting including showing her the damage Undertaker did to her own office. She says she’ll make up her mind tonight and tells him to leave for raising his voice to her.

In the final segment of the show, Smackdown General Manager Stephanie McMahon goes down to the ring to make her decision regarding the cast at No Mercy. She brings Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman down to the ring to hear her announcement in person. Brock did break Undertaker’s hand in the first place, and the Cell match is no disqualification. However, he has been using the cast as a weapon to bloody both Matt Hardy and Brock Lesnar. Taking everything into account she’s decided Undertaker will be allowed to wear his cast. That’s really the only decision which makes sense.

 Lesnar won’t let Stephanie leave the ring and backs her into the corner, intimidating her and looks like he might actually attack her but Undertaker runs down. Lesnar sees him coming and flattens the American Badass with a spinebuster and then stamps on his broken hand which no doubt hurts like hell even with a cast on. With Underaker down and hurt, Paul Heyman bravely slaps him in the face, screaming that he’ll get Hell at No Mercy. He overplays his hand and after Lesnar leaves the ring he tries to kick Undertaker but is caught and pays for it with a big right hand to the head. Heyman comes up bleeding and gets more big thumping right hands and kicks. Undertaker has the last laugh before Hell in a Cell, re-opening Lesnar’s cut too after bloodying his agent. 

Tag Team Title Tournament Semi Finals

In the opening match, the first of two Tag Team Championship tournament semi finals. Edge (in his hometown) and Rey Mysterio vs. Reverend D-Von and Ron Simmons. There’s still been no real explanation of how D-Von and Simmons came together but if it works then it works right? This one doesn’t last very long and a 619 on D-Von leads into an Educution DDT and a victory for Edge and Rey who are now in the finals at No Mercy. They are attacked by Eddie and Chavo Guerrero who haven’t even qualified for the finals yet but have decided to take a shot at their would-be opponents anyway. Eddie has a nasty black eye with stitches which he didn’t have last week - must have happened on a house show.

Eddie and Chavo head back to their locker room and are spooked when the lights are off - turning them on, they’re relieved to see its just their friend Chris Benoit. He doesn’t say anything but Eddie gets really defensive, assuming Benoit thinks he’s the one who jumped Benoit last week and tried to set up Angle to make them fight. Benoit doesn’t even say a word but Eddie and Chavo both get flustered and incriminate themselves. Then he gets angry at Benoit for judging him and questioning his loyalty. Chavo tells Benoit he should be ashamed - he didn’t even say anything! 

In the main event, the second semi final of the WWE Tag Team Championship tournament. Chris Benoit and Kurt Angle vs. Eddie and Chavo Guerrero. Before the match, Kurt and Chris have another confrontation backstage with Kurt accusing Benoit of being jealous of his gold medals. They agree that if they work together they are certain to win the titles at No Mercy. The odd couple enter first and while the Guerreros make their entrance, Edge and Rey Mysterio attack them from behind to settle the score for earlier. Angle and Benoit attack Edge and Mysterio too and get a Spear and 618 respectively for their troubles. Edge and Rey leave both pairs of prospective opponents at No Mercy laid out. After a commercial break, the match begins properly with Eddie in control of Kurt Angle. This is a great match and the fans are really into it but don’t seem to be able to decide who they want to win, cheering for Benoit, Angle and Eddie at various points. Both teams come cross to victory more than once but are always there to break up covers and rescue their partners. They work at a blistering pace. The referee is knocked down and Eddie locks in his new Lasso from El Paso submission hold but Kurt reverses that into an ankle lock. He taps out but there’s no referee to call it. Benoit grabs a steel chair from Chavo to stop him using it and then shakes his hand, implying he’s going to double cross Angle. It’s a swerve and he cracks Chavo in the head, followed by Eddie in the back. Kurt hits the Angle Slam and Benoit and Angle advance to the finals of the Tag Team title tournament to meet Edge and Rey Mysterio at No Mercy. Angle and Benoit actually share a smile together and might be so happy they won they don’t mind being partners anymore. 

Torrie’s Dad Has Got it Going On

Backstage, Torrie Wilson’s dad Al is once again in the building. She has finally watched the show and mentions Dawn Marie giving her phone number to him last week. She calls Dawn a predator. He says nothing happened and gives a big bunch of flowers to his daughter and wishes her luck in her match, which is a mixed tag team match of herself and Rikishi vs. Dawn Marie and Matt Hardy. Matt debuts his Mattitude entrance graphics to go along with his awesome theme music and new attitude. During this match, Cole mentions that Dawn Marie and Torrie will face each other at No Mercy. Matt and Dawn end up in the same corner, crushed by Rikishi and he uses Dawn’s head as a shield to avoid a stink face, letting his partner take the brunt. He does at least reverse a Torrie Wilson roll up on Dawn which gives his team the victory. He’s about to give Torrie a Twist of Fate but she stops him with a low blow and slaps Dawn Marie. Matt avoided the Stink Face once but isn’t so lucky after the match. Torrie teases giving him one of her own which he desperately wants (as would anyone else attracted to women) but it’s a fake out and Rikishi finishes the job. Later when Torrie gets backstage she takes a closer look at the flowers her dad gave her - the gift card says they were actually for Dawn Marie. Oh Al Wilson you sly dog. Torrie goes off looking for her dad and finds him in the shower with Dawn Marie! How traumatising. 

Other Happenings

• Smackdown’s Number One Announcer Funaki interviews Tajiri. He’s going to act as special referee for a boyfriend vs. girlfriend match between Jamie Noble and Nidia tonight. He speaks Japanese but calls them both crazy. Nidia joins the interview and says she’s going to end up on top and have Jamie begging for mercy. Noble asks if she’s sure she wants this match so she slaps him. This feels like kinky foreplay for them! That match is next. Noble is really rough with his girlfriend, slamming her down. Nidia gets nearfalls with a couple of roll ups and actually holds her own against the Cruiserweight Champion. Noble wins the match with a tight roll up. After Tajiri counts the three, Nidia slaps him. It looks like Tajiri might fight back so Noble jumps him, plants his friend with a powerbomb and then makes up with Nidia with hugs and kisses. The match was just foreplay.

• Billy Kidman goes one on one with John Cena. They were partners last week but Cena was a bit of a jerk and blamed Kidman for the loss and he tells Billy to get used to losing. It’s a back and forth match and John Cena rolls up Kidman, getting his feet onto the ropes to steal the victory. Tazz calls him “wacky rollup guy” which is funny because Cena has said that’s a nickname Chris Jericho gave him backstage.