Raw - July 22nd 2002

Break It Down

Raw opens with the new General Manager of Raw. This is the first Raw of the Eric Bischoff era with him fully running the show. The first big change is that the announce team of Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler has been repositioned and are now next to the entrance ramp instead of at ringside. Bischoff gets a lot of boos and with a big smug smile tells the fans he loves them too - he gets some cheers by reminding everyone that The Rock is the new WWE Undisputed Champion and he is here tonight, and that he stole Triple H from Smackdown which brings Triple H out to the ring in his classic denim jacket over leather jacket combo. The look isn’t long for this world as he’ll be having a big rebrand very soon. Triple H takes his time with his entrance which has become the longest thing in wrestling - I swear it gets 30 seconds longer every time he comes out. He is a big Motorhead fan so maybe he wanted to let The Game finish playing every time. Bischoff is about to talk but Triple H cuts him off and introduces his best friend, Shawn Michaels. I still love his theme song. Once they’re both in the ring, Bischoff announces that he is making Shawn Michaels officially Triple H’s manager which means everywhere Triple H goes, Shawn will be there in a “supporting role”. Shawn takes the mic from the new GM and says that while he’s happy to be Triple H’s manager, he does have a problem with Bischoff telling him what to do. Bischoff says that Shawn will be Triple H’s manager not because he wants to be but because he says so - he’s Eric Bischoff. That gets him some loud “asshole” chants. Shawn says that when he’s given a choice of “my way or the highway”, he always picks the highway and leaves. Triple H gets in Eric’s face who tells The Game that he better go and talk some sense into his friend, and Triple H leaves to talk to Shawn.

After a beat, Triple H catches Shawn leaving the arena and they have an argument - Triple H tells Shawn not to “take your ball and go home” like Stone Cold did. Rude. Shawn says he refuses to do what he’s told and won’t be anyone’s lackey. Triple H says that he wants to take this ride together and reminds us that Shawn can’t wrestle because of his injured back so he doesn’t have a lot of other options. He asks Shawn to stay and let him try to figure this out because he has a plan.

Backstage, Big Show reminds Shawn Michaels of the superkick he gave him a few weeks ago as “tough love” but he doesn’t see Kevin Nash or the nWo to back him up anymore so maybe he’ll find out how tough he is on his own. Later, Triple H drops by to see Shawn and throws him a carrier back and tells him to “put it on”. Michaels has a good laugh at the contents and Triple H says he’ll see him in a few minutes out in the ring.

In the arena, after a build up the old D-Generation X music plays in full and the original lineup (minus Chyna) heads down to the ring. Triple H and Shawn Michaels come out in DX t-shirts and it's 1997 all over again. The fans seem to have seen this coming and cheer but it's not as loud as you’d expect. They launch into the traditional DX prematch promo but to everyone’s shock, Triple H turns and boots Shawn in the stomach and plants him face first with a Pedigree. JR talks about it with the kind of disgust you’d save for attacking an invalid or disabled person, talking about Shawn’s back injury and four year absence from the ring like Shawn is in a wheelchair. Triple H leaves and after a replay from a shocked JR and King, he’s shown leaving the arena entirely in a white limo. 

Brock Lesnar - Making Enemies

The only Harvard Graduate in WWE history, Christopher Nowinski makes his way down to the ring and thanks Eric Bischoff for letting him address the crowd. He suggests that the fans hate him out of jealousy rather than because he won’t shut up about Harvard but thankfully his short promo is interrupted by the former Undisputed Champion and now once again Raw exclusive Undertaker. He rides down on his motorbike. A cowering Nowinski offers him the microphone to address the crowd and then, after shaking his hand, attacks him without speaking and Undertaker confirms that he is definitely now a babyface again by drilling Nowinski with a Last Ride. 

The new WWE Undisputed Champion The Rock heads down to the ring. JR says that Vengeance was “one of the greatest triple threat matches of all time” and I actually agree. The main event was incredible. The Rock won his 7th WWE title pinning Kurt Angle. 9th World title overall if we count the WCW titles during the Invasion. The new Champion’s promo is interrupted by Latino Heat Eddie Guerrero before he really says much of anything. Eddie says that he has a big problem with The Rock - his daughters have a poster of The Rock! So he tore it off the wall and destroyed it so they’d know they should only have a poster of their father. He screams like a maniac about it. The Rock calls him a sick, psychopathic freak for talking to his kids like that. The Rock makes fun of Eddie and calls him “Cheech and/or Chong” and Eddie says his mullet should be known as the People’s Mullet.

Eddie challenges him to a match tonight and if he wins he gets a shot at the Undisputed title. The Rock responds by singing La Bamba with adjusted lyrics. If I was over sensitive I’d call this racially insensitive but the crowd loved it and Eddie was obviously happy enough to take part so I’m sure it’s fine. That sets up the show’s main event. Eddie leaves and so does The Rock but when he hops out of the ring, his current Summerslam opponent Brock Lesnar comes out. The Rock stops assuming they’ll have a stare down but Lesnar walks right past The Rock and gives him no attention as Heyman tries not to laugh. The Rock smirks about it so it seems like the mind games haven’t worked as well as he hoped, but the Next Big Thing dissed The Rock.

Brock Lesnar’s match is a singapore cane match with Tommy Dreamer. Dreamer is an ECW alumni with a complicated history with Lesnar’s agent Paul Heyman which I’ve talked about before. Dreamer gets the early advantage with kendo stick shots but it doesn’t last long and after a swift and brutal beating, Brock finishes Dreamer with an F5. He doesn’t get much time to celebrate as Undertaker comes to the ring for pay back the F5 last week and attacks Lesnar with the kendo stick, sending him running.

As Triple H’s limo leaves, a black limo is shown arriving containing Smackdown General Manager Stephanie McMahon. Last night at Vengeance she said she would “tear the heart out of Raw” and with a smile she told security to go and let Bischoff know that she’s here. 

In the main event, The Rock faces Eddie Guerrero in a non-title match. If Eddie wins, he gets a title match next week and of course Chris Benoit has already secured a title match of his own for next week so it could be a big night for the former Radicals. Eddie controls and dominates The Rock and grinds him down with submissions and uses the ropes for leverage every chance he gets. The Rock mounts his comeback and wins with the People’s Elbow and while he celebrates, Brock Lesnar runs to the ring and picks up The Rock’s Undisputed title belt. He admires it and then offers it to The Rock asking him to take it. The Rock doesn’t move so a frustrated Lesnar throws it at his feet instead and leaves with Paul Heyman who looks annoyed. I’m not sure the subtlety of this staredown worked - Lesnar wanted to patronisingly hand the title belt to the champion but he refused to accept it, so it didn’t quite work the way they wanted it to. They leave The Rock celebrating in the ring. Outside the arena, Bischoff goes to see Stephanie and asks what she wants - she’s here to kick him in the testicles. He starts making kung fu noises and striking karate poses and it looks like she’s trying really hard not to laugh. Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman show up and with a smile, get into her limo. Brock Lesnar has defected to Smackdown! 

Goodbye, European Championship

With Triple H and Shawn Michaels gone, Eric Bischoff has a big announcement for the show - he is unifying the Intercontinental and European Championships with the European title being absorbed into the IC title. He reveals that the Intercontinental title belt is above the ring which means Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Dam in a ladder match tonight. That match is first on Raw - starting off the Bischoff era with a bang. I will miss the European Championship but with the stripped down roster there was really no need to have four men’s singles titles available on Raw. I said my goodbye to the European title at Vengeance and I have written an article about the championship too.

This is RVD’s second ladder match in as many months as he beat Eddie Guerrero to regain the IC title. This is Jeff’s second ladder match this month after his awesome performance against Undertaker for the Undisputed title. It’s also their second ladder match against each other - they clashed for the Hardcore title at Summerslam almost one full year ago. This is a good match but quite short by ladder match standards. Rather than call it blow for blow, if you want to watch it you can!

Rob Van Dam wins the match with an awesome Frog Splash off the top of the ladder and after celebrating with his Intercontinental title belt (yes, it still has the WWF logo on it) he helps Jeff to his feet and they shake hands. Great stuff. 

3 Minute Warning

Backstage, Eric Bischoff preaches the benefits of Ruthless Aggression to the returning Rhyno. He does say that he knows Rhyno isn’t ready to return to the ring yet after his neck surgery but when he IS ready he wants him here on Raw. He thanks Bischoff for the first class travel arrangements and they shake hands. In truth, there was no first class travel - the show is in Detroit, which is Rhyno’s hometown. Eric is then cornered by D’Lo Brown and Shawn Stasiak who beg to be on the show and be given a match tonight. Bischoff says that he has a three minute hole in his show so the two of them can go out there and have three minutes to entertain him but if they can’t he’ll make them suffer. Later, Bischoff is seen giving instructions to an unseen party that “once the three minutes are up, it's ALL you”

Eric Bischoff stands at the top of the ramp and tells Stasiak and D’Lo Brown they have three minutes to impress him. Neither man got an entrance and they wrestle frantically with Bischoff shouting the time remaining out to them at different intervals. Bischoff berates them and ends up counting fast and ending it quickly because they’re boring him. As he counts down, both men are attacked by two heavy set Samoans who demolish both Stasiak and D’Lo, ending with a huge splash off the top and then a Vader Bomb in the other corner. Obviously I know who these two men are but we’ll talk about that when we get to it. 

Other Happenings

• In a mixed tag team match, Bubba Ray Dudley and Trish Stratus face William Regal and WWE Women’s Champion Molly Holly. Bubba looks very banged up from his tables match last night and is bandaged up. JR does specify that this is a mixed match which means that legally the men and women can be in the ring together and don’t have to tag out. It doesn’t last long and as Bubba is busy getting a table, Regal drops Trish with a back suplex and locks her in the Regal stretch for a submission victory. 
• Bischoff bumps into Chris Benoit backstage and after telling him he had a great match last night at Vengeance, tells him he’s facing Booker T tonight (and brings up their well regarded Best of Seven series in WCW) and says that the winner of the Benoit/Booker match tonight will get a shot at RVD’s Intercontinental title next week on Raw. 

• Backstage, Goldust congratulates Booker T on his victory last night and calls him the King. Booker assumes he’s going to put a crown on his head and make him look stupid but instead is a Don King wing. Booker laughs and enjoys it and calls Goldust his brother and his tag team partner, which is nice. That leads into his match with Chris Benoit. Booker has taped ribs from his No disqualification match with Big Show 24 hours ago so is at a disadvantage. During this match I noticed there must be an issue with the way the ring is assembled as whenever the two wrestle in the middle of the ring there’s a noticeable squeaking noise, like a spring or something grinding against metal. This is a good match with Benoit focusing his attack on Booker’s lower back but Booker fights like a heroic babyface (because that’s what he is now) and gets nearfalls from a missile dropkick and scissors kick. Benoit exposed a turnbuckle and that makes the difference as he runs Booker into it and then locks in the Crossface for a submission victory and to earn himself a shot at the Intercontinental title next week.

• Eric Bischoff joins the announce desk for the next match which he says is to help Big Show get his mojo back - the opponent is Spike Dudley who shoots a dirty look at Bischoff as he walks to the ring. This is obviously a very unfair mismatch but Bischoff maintains his false, cheerful, sucking up to everyone personality. He plays “smarmy heel. ” better than anyone in wrestling history honestly. Big Show obviously kills Spike quickly with a big chokeslam. He’s about to leave but Bischoff signals to Show that he wants to see it continue and wants to see him use a table. Big Show does as he’s asked and gets a table from under the ring. He’s about to drill the 150lbs Spike through the table but Bubba Dudley runs down to help out his little brother. It doesn’t work as he’s still hurt from last night and with Spike laying on the table, he chokeslams Bubba onto him, driving both men through the table much to Bischoff’s amusement. JR is disgusted but King loves it too and likes all this brutality that Eric is creating.

Smackdown - July 25th 2002

Who is Jumping Ship? Brock Lesnar makes his impact

Smackdown opens with a video from Stephanie McMahon. It’s pretty cheesy and cringey but includes multiple announcements for the show. Here it is for you to enjoy with me, along with the updated Smackdown intro. They haven’t taken DDP out of it even though he retired in June, and Triple H is still in it but that’s fair as he only moved to Raw five days ago.

In the opening match, Kurt Angle faces the World’s Strongest Man Mark Henry. The match doesn’t last long before the newest Smackdown superstar comes to the ring and flattens Henry with an F5. Angle is pissed and follows Brock backstage and asks what the hell he was doing? Lesnar says he was just helping Kurt out because he needed it. He says he wanted to face Kurt at Summerslam for the title but he blew it at Vengeance and now with Brock on Smackdown, Kurt isn’t the number one guy anymore. Kurt steams and leaves as Heyman laughs and tells Brock how great he is.

Stacy Keibler drops in to see Stephanie McMahon and offers to be her assistant like she was for Vince. While she’s there, a vase of flowers arrives with a card - they’re from Eric Bischoff who’ll be here tonight. Steph smashes the vase in a rage. It seems the talent raids between Raw and Smackdown are just getting started. Later, Stacy tells the security teams to be on the look out for anything suspicious and to contact Stephanie immediately. She sees Edge walking out of the arena and panics, phoning Steph to say she thinks that Edge might be the one jumping ship. Later, the security stops Edge and Stephanie arrives to question him - he says he trusts her and her vision for Smackdown and asks her to trust him. He’s Smackdown through and through and leads her to the production truck with a VHS tape. It’s a clock, counting down until he gets his hands on Chris Jericho tonight. The paranoia continues as later when Mark Lloyd tries to get an interview with Kurt Angle, he’s too busy speaking to someone named Eric on the phone.

New WWE Tag Team Champions, Christian and Lance Storm, discuss their big victory at Vengeance. It doesn’t amount to much but they want to put two more Americans in their place tonight in the main event against Rock and Hogan.

Test is at ringside with Christian and Storm for their big title defence. Rock and Hogan have history and are without doubt the two biggest stars in the entire company at the moment but their teaming together seems unremarkable somehow - they barely interact during their entrances and wrestle like a normal tag team. There’s loud “USA” chants directed at the Anti-Americans. Rock and Hogan obviously have no issues with the two midcarders but thanks to interference by Test, Storm and Christian are able to isolate and work over The Rock. The main eventers mount a comeback and with a Rock Bottom on Storm and a Leg Drop on Christian, Hogan and Rock have the titles won. Brock Lesnar rushes the ring and attacks Hogan, breaking up the pin and giving them the victory by disqualification (but the Anti-Americans keep the titles) and then he flattens Hogan with an F5. Lesnar and Heyman leave and head straight out to the parking lot and want to leave but the limo driver tells them the car is actually for Hulk Hogan. Lesnar threatens the driver and says they’re taking the car and if he doesn’t drive he’ll kick his ass. The driver accepts that.

Backstage before his match with Test, John Cena cuts a promo making fun of Test’s voice and teeth. Quite mean but funny and he shows a lot of personality. Test shows up and slaps the rookie in the face, which just makes Cena smile in that intense “Ruthless Aggression”y kind of way. 

Stephanie McMahon’s paranoia continues as she finds Chris Jericho and, after promoting Fozzy’s new CD, he says he has no intention of leaving for Raw and that he’s very happy on Smackdown and will be even happier after he beats Edge in a steel cage tonight.

Backstage, Rey Mysterio fresh off his very successful debut (see the next section) bumps into Anti-American Test who’s on the way to the ring for his own match and Test attacks Rey from behind and throws him into a metal shutter for seemingly no reason. “Welcome to Smackdown, kid”. Test has a bad attitude and his match with John Cena is up next. Test dominates the rookie but a powerbomb is reversed into a rollup and Cena picks up his second victory in a row. Sore loser Test puts down Cena with a Big Boot after the match.

In the main event, Chris Jericho and Edge - both coming off losses at Vengeance - send their short lived TV only rivalry in a steel cage. Edge hurt his shoulder in his cage match with Kurt Angle a couple of months ago and got very lucky. The original diagnosis was surgery and 4 - 6 months of missed action. It ended up being significantly less serious and he only missed 4 weeks. This is a physical match with Jericho busting Edge open and bringing a steel chair into the ring to use as a weapon. They battle it out at the top of the cage and after Edge brings Jericho down from the top of the cage with an electric chair drop, they race to escape the cage with Edge going up and out over the top and winning it.

He’s attacked by the Anti-American trio of Christian, Lance Storm and Test who take him back into the cage. John Cena runs down to get even with Test and to help out Edge but he’s overwhelmed. The difference maker is Rey Mysterio who, on his first night in WWE, runs down, climbs the cage and dives off the top onto Storm and Christian! Edge, Cena and Rey clear the ring of the four Canadians and end Smackdown celebrating in the cage. Michael Cole calls the three of them the future of Smackdown. Man, he had no idea.

Backstage, Stephanie McMahon rushes out to the parking lot to confront Eric Bischoff. She still doesn’t know who has jumped ship and has been paranoid all night that it’s Kurt Angle who won’t return her calls. Bischoff has SOMEONE in his limo but won’t reveal who it is and speeds off with his new signing. Kurt Angle approaches Stephanie from behind and reveals that it’s certainly not him - the Eric he was speaking to was his brother, not Bischoff! What a cliffhanger though - if Kurt Angle wasn’t in the limo, who was? 

Biggest Little Debut

Rey Mysterio makes his WWE debut against Chavo Guerrero. Rey was, at the time, already considered one of the greatest high flyers and cruiserweights of all time and, without belabouring the point, has only grown stronger in that regard in the 23 years since. Rey is a legend and I’m happy to see him arrive and that I now get to watch and talk about his matches in this era. Rey gets a lot of love from the crowd. Fans either know who he is already or have bought into the month of build up WWE has given him. I should mention that in WCW, he spent the last year or so of his career with no mask but it’s always been smart of WWE to just pretend that period never happened and put the mask back on him. He’s way cooler as a superhero like luchadore than just a small guy with a baby face. This is a good match with Rey getting lots of oohs and aahs from the WWE crowd for his various flips, reversals and high flying. He debuts the 619 in this match - Tazz and Cole already know it’s name but to be clear for anyone not in the know, that move was a WWE invention. He finishes with a springboard into a hurricanrana (the West Coast Pop) for the victory. Good stuff. 

Other Happenings

• Reverend D-Von (with Batista) takes on The Big Valbowski (with his apparent Tag Team partner, Hardcore Holly). At least they’re trying to give Smackdown a tag team division seeing as they have the WWE Tag Team titles. Batista fights with Holly on the outside as Val wins the match with a back suplex into a powerbomb. Batista isn’t happy and lays out both Valbowski and Hardcore with spinebusters after the match.

There’s a new Summerslam advert with Trish Stratus in an ice cream truck. Enjoy.

• Rikishi vs. Albert is a feud that started right after the brand split but we haven’t really seen Albert since. He’s brutal and puts down Rikishi immediately with a bicycle kick and continues the beating. Albert is vicious but it's hard to take him seriously in such small ring gear with such a hairy torso. Rikishi mounts a comeback with a Stink face, superkick and Banzai drop to win this match clean as a whistle and pretty easily. So much for Albert’s push. Rikishi finds his hat at the top of the ramp - that’s replaced the old sunglasses as his favourite prop - and busts out the old Too Cool dance. 

Raw - July 29th 2002

Ominous Warnings and Mysterious attacks

Raw opens with Eric Bischoff who reveals who he has signed and stolen away from Smackdown - Test and the WWE Tag Team Champions Lance Storm and Christian. That means the WWE Tag Team titles are now on Raw, and this marks the debut of a couple of things - this group finally has its Un-American’s name, and Test comes out carrying an upside down American flag which has both JR and King raging in disgust at their actions. Storm runs down various American icons like John Wayne, Babe Ruth and Elvis Presley. Not all of the references land for me but I think all this anti-American rhetoric is hilarious and hearing JR and King squeal about how much they hate it makes me laugh. Christian takes over and basically calls Americans stupid, fat and lazy. He’s certainly right that that’s how the rest of the world sees America and in 2025, claiming the whole world hates America hits the nail on the head. Storm praises an American who can and should be proud and that’s Eric Bischoff but he’s interrupted by Shawn Michaels. He wastes no time - he wants Triple H and he wants him tonight. Bischoff says that Triple H isn’t here yet but when he arrives he’ll send him Shawn’s way. He takes some shots at Canadian hero Bret Hart and tells Bischoff that either he brings Triple H to him, or he’ll kick his ass and drag what's left of him to Bischoff. Shawn leaves and Lance Storm closes by promising that the Un-Americans will make a big impact here tonight on Raw. 

Shawn Michaels marches around backstage looking for Triple H. He goes into the locker room and runs into Booker T and Goldust. Booker gets in his face and tells him that he enjoyed seeing him get Pedigreed last week and says it’s not so nice to be attacked like that! Shawn says that their issues were business, not personal and leaves. It seems like Booker’s not done with Shawn Michaels after that whole messy nWo business.

Backstage, Shawn is still looking for Triple H and runs into Big Show who is all angry and worked up after Bubba Ray’s actions earlier. Shawn blows him off - he’s busy and doesn’t have time to talk. A frustrated Show says he’ll make some time for him. Later as Shawn’s search continues, Big Show can be seen in the background following him around. 

Backstage, The Un-Americans chat with William Regal who praises and agrees with their message. It’s also implied that the “pulled muscle” Molly Holly mentioned earlier isn’t real and they just wanted to let Big Show take his place in that mixed tag team match. The Un-Americans also wish luck to Chris Benoit ahead of his Intercontinental title match with Rob Van Dam. Test, Storm and Christian are working hard to recruit other Canadians and non-Americans it seems. Maybe a new member is what they mean by making an impact tonight?

After Jamal and Rosey’s beat down of Mae Young and Moolah (see Other Happenings), Eric Bischoff is in the ring bragging about how he is the boss of Raw and when he snaps his fingers, things just happen. Everyone on Raw falls in line and does what he says - The Undertaker’s music hits and he walks to the ring. He begins to intimidate the General Manager until Chris Nowinski interrupts. He says that Undertaker is a bully and he’s not in charge - Bischoff is! He tells Undertaker that he doesn’t have to be jealous just because he doesn’t have a degree. Bischoff tells Nowinski that he has a match with Undertaker now. Chris changes his tune and says that NO ONE tells Undertaker what to do. Undertaker says he won’t wrestle Nowinski because Bischoff says so - he’ll do it because he wants to, rocking the Harvard grad with a big right hand to start this match. Nowinski gets in more offence than you’d think with a kick, clothesline and a big dropkick for a near fall. It doesn’t last long and a chokeslam, old school and finally a Last Ride puts the rookie in his place for an easy Undertaker victory. He gets no time to enjoy it as he’s attacked by new Raw signees the Un-Americans. JR must have said “Un-American” 45 times in three minutes during this attack as the three of them lay into the American Badass (first time he’s been called that in a while) and Test holds him up for Christian and Lance Storm to give him a con-chair-to. They’re very safe and pretty clearly miss Undertaker completely with the first one so he stays still and they give him a second which looks a little better but he doesn't go down until Test “drops” him. At least they didn’t injure him for real. Test ends by saying “here lies the American Badass” and the three leave together to boos and JR continues to scream about America and their Un-American behaviour. He gets the point across, if nothing else! Backstage after a commercial break, Test says that the Un-Americans still have one more big piece of business to attend to tonight. 

Shawn Michaels has been looking for Triple H all night and hasn’t been able to find him. The Game’s music plays and he makes his way down to the ring as King and JR speculate that he must have JUST arrived at the arena and headed straight down to the ring. He says that he knows Shawn Michaels is out in the parking lot waiting for him but he doesn’t settle things out there, he settles things in the ring. He explains turning on Shawn last week - after everything he’s done for Michaels, Shawn couldn’t return the favour and do something for him. He was the one who wanted him as his manager. Shawn couldn’t bring himself to be in Triple H’s shadow and couldn’t help but force himself back into the spotlight. “The Game has passed you by and now I am the showstopper, I am the Icon”. He finds the idea that Shawn thinks he’s still in Triple H’s league laughable and tells Shawn that his pride is going to get him hurt - he needs to either get hurt, or he needs to accept his role as Triple H’s manager and lackey. A camera man gets Triple H’s attention and passes him some news - whatever it is upsets Triple H and he leaves the ring without speaking and runs to the back and all the way out to the parking lot where Shawn Michaels has been attacked. Someone has smashed Shawn’s face into the window of a car. Triple H is deeply concerned and his issues with Shawn have gone right out the window as he’s now more concerned about his friend’s well being than their egos.

Who did it? Booker T and Big Show would seem to be the most likely suspects given what we’ve seen with them tonight but Eric Bischoff implies that Triple H did it. The Game is offended and says “fuck you” (which is beeped). This was too far even for Triple H it would seem. It occurs to me that the Un-Americans also promised that they weren’t done for the night and had a run in with Shawn at the start of the show so they have to be suspects too. 

Flair’s Announcement

Ric Flair tees up that he has a huge announcement to make tonight. He wants to save it for the end of the show after his match with The Rock. The show is in Ric’s hometown so this is the perfect place for it. JR and King speculate he’s going to announce his retirement for the rest of the show.

Jonathan Coachman interviews WWE Undisputed Champion The Rock. He has some fun at Coach’s expense as you’d expect. He refers to “that ugly hermaphrodite Kevin Kelly” and “masturbating Mark Lloyd on Smackdown” and implies that Coach engages in sexual acts with a cow called Bessie. He does eventually move on to serious topics like his match with Brock Lesnar at Summerslam - he tells him to Just Bring It, and he can have an ass whopping anytime he likes, we don’t need to wait until Summerslam. He also gives a shoutout to Ric Flair and Nature Boy struts in and out of the camera shot. He respects Ric Flair and is excited for a match with him tonight. 

In the main event, deep in the heart of Flair Country, The Rock takes on Ric Flair in a non-title match. The Rock gets a lot of boos from the fans in Ric’s hometown. It’s a good match and Ric blocks a People’s Elbow attempt by grabbing The Rock’s ankle and turning it into the Figure Four. The Rock escapes to the ropes and after a Rock Bottom, puts down Flair for the victory.

The two shake hands after the match and The Rock leaves so Ric can make his announcement in peace. Before he can tells us anything, Smackdown’s Chris Jericho’s theme music plays. Flair is left looking around for Jericho who comes through the crowd and blasts Flair with a steel chair. He ends Raw by saying that the only announcement that matters is that once again, Raw is Jericho. Eric Bischoff has signed another big name from Smackdown. That’s not the last big roster change we’ll see this month! 

Big Title Change

Rob Van Dam defends the Intercontinental Championship against Chris Benoit. This is a good match which Benoit dominates and works over RVD until he rallies with a heel kick and goes for the Frog Splash. Benoit waits too long to roll out of the way and they botch as RVD still kind of lands on Benoit but not quite. It’s easily dismissed and they recover as both men stay down to sell the bad landing and Benoit quickly takes RVD down into the Crossface. The champion makes it to the ropes to break the hold but his roll up is countered into a second Crossface much further from the ropes. RVD is forced to fight out of that one but Benoit rolls through it and into a cover, getting his feet onto the ropes for additional illegal leverage. Chris Benoit wins the Intercontinental title and leaves with the belt quickly as RVD argues with the referee.

Hardcore Excitement

Backstage, Ric Flair is preparing for his scheduled non-title match with WWE Champion The Rock and runs into Jeff Hardy. He tells Jeff that he doesn’t want him to hurt himself and that he needs to take better care of himself. Eric Bischoff turns up and Flair tries to get Eric to agree that Jeff shouldn’t be risking his health. Bischoff makes it clear that he doesn’t really care about Jeff’s health - he just wants entertainment. 

Jeff’s match is a Hardcore Championship match with Bradshaw. It’s a classic, physical hardcore rules match. JR mentions that last night on Heat, Bradshaw used a kayak as a weapon in a hardcore rules match which sounds fun. They blast each other with trash cans and Bradshaw tries to powerbomb Jeff off the ringsteps in the ring but is backdropped off. Jeff introduces a ladder and wins the title with a Swanton Bomb off the ladder. He gets no time to celebrate as Johnny The Bull attacks and pins him to win the Hardcore title under the 24/7 rule. He’s clobbered with a Clothesline from Hell by Bradshaw but before he can cover to regain his title, Tommy Dreamer shows up with a kendo stick and knocks out everyone before pinning Johnny, winning the Hardcore title and taking off through the crowd. 

Other Happenings

• A member of the security team tells Bischoff that “a woman” is outside in a limo waiting for him. He assumes it's Stephanie McMahon and promises to take care of it. After the Guerrero/Booker match Eric goes out to confront her but instead of Stephanie, the women in question are Moolah and Mae Young. Haven’t seen them for a long time! 
• Booker T faces Eddie Guerrero. Both men suffered frustrating losses last week so this match is set up to allow them both to get back on the winning track. That’s sensible enough. This is a good match but not as good as you’d expect given the names involved. The fans are into Booker at least. Eddie exposes a turnbuckle just like Benoit did last week but it backfires and Booker sends Latino Heat into it and finishes with a Scissors Kick to win the match. He delights the crowd with a Spinarooni to celebrate.

• A rematch from next week as Trish Stratus and Bubba Ray Dudley take on William Regal and Women’s Champion Molly Holly. Same rules as last week - the men and women can interact and wrestle each other. Before the match, Molly reveals that William Regal has actually pulled a muscle and can’t compete tonight so she has a replacement, who turns out to be the 500lbs Big Show. Bubba uses the ringsteps to keep Big Show down and busy on the outside and after avoiding the Molly Go Round, Molly goes up onto Bubba’s shoulders so Trish can take her down with a flying clothesline. That gives Trish the victory but sore loser Big Show shoves little Trish violently to the mat and plants Bubba with a chokeslam. He isn’t done and goes to get a table just like last week against Spike. Trish shows a lot of guts and gets a steel chair to try and save Bubba from going through the table and almost pays for it with a chokeslam through the table! Bubba cracks Show in the back with a steel chair to rescue Trish and the two make their escape. A frustrated Big Show breaks the table with a punch which was cool but no one really acknowledged it. 

• Moolah and Mae Young are here to promote Moolah’s autobiography. This has aged like milk as Moolah has since been outed as a monstrous human being who doesn’t deserve anyone’s respect. JR is surprised that Bischoff is giving them this chance to promote the book. When they get to the ring, Eric tells them they only have three minutes to talk about anything they want. Moolah starts to speak and the fans actually start to boo her - I’m not sure why. I guess the fans in 2002 weren’t great for respecting people. Moolah and Mae Young talk erratically about her career and some of the stuff thats in her book until finally the three minutes are up and just like D’Lo Brown and Shawn Stasiak last week, they’re attacked by the same two big heavyset Samoans. They’re really rough with the two old women and bodyslam Mae and follow with a splash off the top rope as Bischoff laughs uncontrollably and tells us these two men’s names - Jamal and Rosey. Much like with Jeff Jarrett in 1999, there is something really funny to me about seeing these two old ladies get the shit kicked out of them. I think because it’s just SO ridiculous and over the top. 

Smackdown - August 1st 2002

Battle for Brock

Kurt Angle heads down to the ring and apologises for giving the fans a scare last week and making anyone think their Olympic hero might leave them. He turns his attention to the “snot nosed punk” who insulted him last week, Brock Lesnar. He sarcastically asks Brock where his gold medals are and dares the “stupid cave beast” to come out and prove he’s number one. It’s not Brock Lesnar who comes out, it’s Hollywood Hulk Hogan! He calls Kurt a crybaby and tells him to shut the hell up. Hogan says that while Kurt was out crying because Lesnar insulted him, he was trying to regain his Tag Team titles when Lesnar attacked him. If anyone is fighting Lesnar tonight, it’s him. Hogan heads down to the ring for a fight with Kurt but Smackdown General Manager Stephanie McMahon comes out to stop them. She applauds their competitive nature and says that since they both want to get their hands on Brock Lesnar tonight it’ll be Kurt Angle vs. Hulk Hogan and the winner can face Brock Lesnar next week. Kurt promises to make Hogan tap out again tonight and because he feels sorry for him, he’ll make it quick. Hogan attacks Kurt and sends him over the top rope and that sets up our main event tonight.

Brock Lesnar (w/Paul Heyman) makes his Smackdown in ring debut against the World’s Strongest Man Mark Henry. Lesnar shows off his freaky strength with an overhead belly to belly suplex on the massive Henry and finishes with an F5 to win the match. I’m happy they’ve moved beyond him needing Heyman’s help and he just wins clean now. Backstage, Brock Lesnar goes straight to Hulk Hogan’s locker room and tells him that he hopes he beats Kurt Angle because he’d LOVE to end the Hulkster next week. Later, Lesnar goes to see Kurt and tells him the same thing, patronisingly calling him “little buddy”

Hollywood Hulk Hogan vs. Kurt Angle in a King of the Ring rematch. Hogan’s one and only (WWE) submission loss was to Kurt at that event of course. I enjoyed this more than their King of the Ring match - maybe because it was shorter and the expectations were lower. Hogan battles through many suplexes, kicking out of an Angle slam and escaping an ankle lock. The referee goes down and Kurt tries to use a chair but its kicked back in his face. Hogan drops the Immortal Leg Drop but there’s no referee to count. Lesnar runs down and while Hogan is chasing him off, Kurt blasts him in the back with a steel chair. The referee saw that and disqualified Angle which means Hogan wins and he’ll now face Brock Lesnar next week on Smackdown. Kurt tries to beat up Hogan but he Hulks up and puts Angle down with a big boot. His Leg Drop is interrupted by Lesnar who, for the second week in a row, leaves Hulk Hogan laying with an F5. 

Lesnar seems to have gotten the last laugh at the end of Smackdown after costing Rock his tag team match (see the next section) until Hulk Hogan hits him from behind with a steel chair and blasts him twice more to end Smackdown with Brock, for the first time, on the losing end of a physical exchange. 

A Radical Arrival

Stephanie McMahon gets backstage and finds Raw GM Eric Bischoff waiting in her office. He smugly crows about how much better he’s doing in the battle to sign superstars - Raw is winning 5 to 1, and he got the Tag Team titles! She screams and has him kicked out by security. Easy E plays an asshole so easily, but Stephanie is a terrible babyface because she’s so unlikeable. She does tell him that tonight’s main event involves Edge and WWE Undisputed Champion The Rock which everyone assumes means a singles match between them.

In the make-up room, Stacy Keibler’s routine is interrupted by Stephanie McMahon. She accuses Stacy of being the one to let Eric Bischoff get away with being in the arena and of being a Raw spy. I’m not sure what she expected Stacy to do about it? Tackle him? She warns Stacy that if Bischoff ever shows up again she’ll suffer the consequences. After the GM walks away, Stacy smiles to herself. What is she up to? 

In the Smackdown locker room, Mike Awesome, Hardcore Holly and Billy Kidman are watching Raw, specifically the attack on Shawn Michaels. Stephanie McMahon walks in and tells them off for watching Raw instead of Smackdown and says this is why they’re not main eventers - they don’t pay enough attention to their own product. No one better watch Raw ever again! 

Before the main event, which is apparently a non-title match between The Rock and Edge, Eric Bischoff comes through the crowd with a ticket and offers someone in the front row cash to swap seats with him which he does. With the Raw GM at ringside, Smackdown’s GM comes out to the ring and sarcastically praises Bischoff’s smarts in getting back inside. Stephanie says that she seems to have misspoken earlier - the main event is not The Rock vs. Edge, it’s The Rock and Edge together as a tag team against her newest signings - Eddie Guerrero and the new Intercontinental Champion Chris Benoit. The former Radicals are now on Smackdown which of course means the Intercontinental Championship is now exclusive to Smackdown too.

The Brand Split was only four months ago and this is the 2nd time Benoit has changed brands already. A furious Bischoff jumbos the security wall and tries to talk Stephanie but he’s tackled by security and dragged out of the building through the crowd. That gives us an exciting and unexpected tag team main event. Benoit and Guerrero isolate Edge and work him over in their corner with quick tags in and out. The Rock gets a hot tag and lays into Guerrero and Benoit but when Brock Lesnar saunters to the ring, the distraction allows Benoit to lock the Undisputed champion in the Crossface. He rips and tears at The Rock until finally the People’s Champion has no choice but to tap out, staring into Brock Lesnar’s eyes the whole time. A big statement made by the Next Big Thing ahead of Summerslam and a big win for Benoit and Guerrero. 

Giving Michael Cole some Love

WWE Cruiserweight Champion Jamie Noble and his girlfriend Nidia cut an in ring promo about how being the champion makes him better and richer than all the “low class red necks” in North Carolina. He tries to prove that they’re royalty by going out to ringside and Noble encourages Nidia to climb onto Michael Cole and “do that thing with your tongue” as Nidia basically just sexually assaults Michael Cole so that he’ll say nice things about them from now on. She unbuttons his shirt and kisses him all over the neck and face. This was pretty funny. Cole is furious after they leave - I hope they didn’t even tell him about this segment and sprung it on him on TV. 

Other Happenings

• Smackdown opens with Rey Mysterio vs. Tajiri. It’s as good as you’d expect and Tajiri gives Rey a much harder time than Chavo did last week. After some very close near falls, Rey rallies with a 619 and West Coast Pop combo just like last week to win his second match on Smackdown.
• Backstage, Billy and Chuck talk about their future now that there’s no Tag Team titles for them to win on Smackdown. Rico catches them in the midst of breaking up but he tells them to trust him and says this will all work out for the best. They leave and John Cena emerges from his locker room and Rico takes issue with his smile and starts to mock his appearance. He tries to slap Cena but it’s blocked and Cena throws a punch but stops himself - he’s only teasing but that sets up a match for later.

• Reverend D-Von (with Batista of course) takes on Rikishi. Rikishi’s never ending push continues as he fights off both men to defeat D-Von with a superkick and then after the match, gets ready for a Stink face. Batista makes the save and puts down Rikishi with his big spinebuster. 
• John Cena has only wrestled main eventers so far and has had strong performances against Kurt Angle and Chris Jericho, even defeating Jericho in his PPV debut. He beat Test last week of course but this is his first match with someone on a similar level to him in the pecking order so he shouldn’t have any problems beating Rico and might get to finally show us what his finishing move is. I was right and a back suplex into a slam wins it for the rookie. He called that the Protobomb in OVW but he’s not the Prototype anymore so that wouldn’t work as a name now. After the match, Cena slaps Rico for the insult earlier but he’s jumped by Billy and Chuck who lay out Cena with a version of the LOD’s doomsday device.

Raw - August 5th 2002

Jericho Arrives and Triple H Hunts

Raw opens with the newest addition to the Raw roster, Chris Jericho. JR and King recap his attack of Ric Flair last week at the end of Raw which actually does make sense - he and Flair had multiple run-ins when he was a babyface owner earlier on this year to the point where it seemed like they were working towards Jericho vs. Flair at Wrestlemania X8. Jericho says he jumped ship to Raw because Eric Bischoff is a genius and knows the difference between a superstar like him and a loser like the fans. He calls himself the King of the World and says that Ric Flair in his prime had half the talent that Jericho has now. His rant is interrupted by his old rival from Smackdown, Triple H. The Game says that Shawn Michaels' assailant from last week hasn't revealed themselves yet and accuses Chris Jericho of being the one behind it - he has a vendetta against Triple H and he showed up on Raw the same week it happened. Jericho turns it around and accuses Triple H of doing it. He was the one who turned on Shawn two weeks ago.

It’s funny because by the rules of wrestling, somehow Triple H attacking Michaels two weeks ago makes it LESS likely he’s the one behind last week’s attack - usually the most obvious outcome is the one the company doesn’t go with. Triple H says he believes it wasn’t Jericho because he doesn’t have the balls, but he will find out who did it tonight one way or the other. Triple H leaves and with Jericho alone once again, Rob Van Dam comes out to interrupt him next. Jericho insults him for never having anything to say so Rob asks if between claiming he owns Raw and his outfit, is he high? He challenges Jericho to a match tonight because there can only be one Mr. Monday Night. Jericho accepts and after a brief back and forth over whether the fans should be chanting R-V-D or Y-2-J, they get physical and Jericho puts down Rob with a spinning heel kick and runs away, very proud of himself.

Triple H continues his search for Shawn Michaels’ assailant and questions Booker T. Booker denies having anything to do with it, but does say he's happy about it because he hates Shawn Michaels. Triple H tells him that if he finds out he DID have anything to do with it, he’ll pay him a visit with the sledgehammer.

Detective Triple H continues his search and questions the Un-Americans. He tells them not to be afraid of him, they should be afraid of the Undertaker after what they did last week. Christian confesses - they WERE going to attack Shawn but when they got to the parking lot, he was already laid out. It wasn’t them. Triple H seems to believe that but smashes a catering table with his sledgehammer to intimidate them I guess. Probably quite annoying for anyone who wanted a snack later though.

Backstage, Triple H goes to see Big Show who is waiting for Trish Stratus to apparently attack her for what she did earlier (see Other Happenings). That seems very uncool. Triple H reminds Show of all the things Shawn did to him in the nWo which might have made him want to attack him last week. Big Show looks Triple H right in the eyes and tells him that it wasn’t him and if it had been, he’d own it. Show decides he’s had enough and leaves. The arena? Raw itself? I guess we’ll see.

Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam is a rematch from the King of the Ring of course and I mentioned at that event that the match was fine but not well received, leading Jericho to have a rather public melt down about it online. I’m sure that put the pressure on them to have a much better match here in what is technically the main event ahead of the final Triple H/Shawn Michaels segment. It is better than their previous match - the fans were certainly a lot more into it - as they trade big moves and near falls at a frantic pace. The referee goes down and Jericho takes advantage, getting a steel chair and using it on Van Dam’s ribs. Ric Flair takes advantage and runs down, clocking Jericho with a steel chair of his own. RVD follows up with a Five Star Frog Splash as the referee wakes up to win the match. Jericho steams in the ring as Flair struts and shows off at the top of the ramp.

In the main event of the show, Eric Bischoff has promised he has a surprise for Triple H. He comes to the ring and the surprise is a satellite link up with Shawn Michaels so the two can talk. Here’s the video that opened Raw, recapping the events of last week and the likely suspects before we get into this segment

Triple H asks if Shawn got his messages. HBK tells him that there’s no hard feelings and they’re cool - loved ones fall out and have issues, he heard what Triple H said and he understands. They’ll move past their issues and they’re still best friends. Bischoff pressures them to speed things up in case they get cut off, so Triple H moves on to his investigation. Shawn says he has no information, he didn’t see who hit him from behind but the local police did send him some security camera footage. He shows some blurry footage where we can clearly see Shawn’s attack but we can’t see who did it. Triple H says that Shawn isn’t safe and says that maybe he should stay away for a while. Michaels says that modern technology is amazing and they can enhance the image so we can see - he shows that and we discover that the man who attacked Triple H was Triple H himself. You can kind of tell that it's him even before the image got cleared up to be honest. Triple H initially looks disappointed to have been found out before breaking out into a smile.

He did it and he’s proud of it! Triple H tells Shawn that he did it to prove how weak and vulnerable he is and he should stay home. Michaels says that he isn’t in the best shape right now but he can defend himself and he will be 100% by Summerslam. Triple H laughs off his challenge and angrily screams that he can’t wrestle anymore - his career is OVER. HBK is DEAD. That was certainly what everyone thought at the time. Triple H tells him that if he is serious about this challenge, next time he won’t stop and he will cripple Michaels for good. Shawn doesn’t back down and says that while he may not be the wrestler he once was, he can still fight and he will at Summerslam.

Un-American Victories

Terri interviews the Un-Americans and calls their actions against the Undertaker last week deplorable. He mocks George Bush, makes a thinly veiled comment about 9/11 and says that America’s attempts to “get revenge overseas” is just American aggression against innocent civilians. He’s not wrong! Their anti-American promo is interrupted by former WWE Champion Sgt. Slaughter. Test gets in his face and a match is set for later tonight where Slaughter promises to show Test real American aggression. 

Test comes out carrying the upside down American flat for his match with Sgt. Slaughter who has a flag of his own. JR and King’s disgust towards Test and the Un-Americans just makes me like them even more. Test beats up Slaughter and doesn’t even bother sticking around for a match - he just runs him into the ring post and leaves, laughing and waving the upside down flat in triumph.

The Un-Americans defend the WWE Tag Team titles against The Hardyz. They had been focused on their singles goals with no tag titles to win but that’s all changed now.

Jeff was always the more popular of the two but his recent success and interactions with Undertaker have just made that gulf even bigger. Matt and Jeff have the match won with their Twist of Fate and Swanton Bomb combo but Christian uses one of the Tag title belts as a weapon right in front of the referee to cause the disqualification and keep the tag team titles. Test joins in and the three An-Americans set about beating up Matt and Jeff until Undertaker arrives with a metal chain. He swings and throws punches but Test, Christian and Lance Storm escape and sprint to the back, through the arena and out into a waiting car in the parking lot. Undertaker gives chase and actually steals a police motorbike to continue the pursuit.

Just Three Minutes

JR and King discuss Moolah’s book and the beating that Eric Bischoff orchestrated on Moolah and Mae Young last week. King looks like he’s trying not to laugh and makes some old jokes which I always enjoy.

Backstage, Howard Finkle goes to see Eric Bischoff and says that he wants to challenge Lillian Garcia tonight so he can get his job back as the main ring announcer for Raw. Bischoff tells him that he doesn’t care but he can go and trade off with Lillian, one for one and the fans can decide who they prefer.

In the arena, Eric Bischoff says it’s time to settle the arguments between Howard Finkle and Lillian Garcia. They’ve been trading off announcements all night just as he suggested. Howard makes a joke about Lillian servicing sailors, she replies with a joke about erectile dysfunction. Bischoff decides the disagreement has gone on for “three minutes too long” and JR immediately flips out at the mention of three minutes. Jamal and Rosey show up through the crowd, just as they did to D’Lo and Stasiak two weeks ago, and Moolah and Mae Young last week. Howard shoves Lillian into harm’s way and escapes like a coward and poor Lillian is flattened with a Samoan drop and a big splash off the top rope as Bischoff laughs uproariously. He calls himself the King of Sports Entertainment and after a commercial break, Lillian is stretchered out of the arena.

Hardcore Action

Backstage, Hardcore Champion Tommy Dreamer is preparing for a title defence later but his challenger, Bradshaw approaches with a referee and attacks with a kendo stick, starting the match early. They brawl backstage and into the crowd making their way towards the ring. Bradshaw brutalises Dreamer and chokes him with a bullrope against the ring post. I feel like Dreamer was starting to get over with his comedy “eating weird things” gimmick but that only lasted a couple of weeks. He probably had more future as a tough as nails hardcore specialist playing on his ECW history but sadly this didn’t last long for him either. The fans weren’t super into it initially but some near falls and brutal shots to the head from the kendo stick woke them up. Dreamer DDTs Bradshaw onto the ringsteps to finally win the match and quickly makes a getaway through the crowd with his title belt. It’s still the custom Texas flag belt that Bradshaw introduced a couple of weeks ago. 

Other Happenings

• Bubba Ray Dudley faces a huge challenge, taking on Big Show in a tables match. Big Show dominates and sets up a table to finish it but when Trish Stratus comes down to distract Show, first seducing and then slapping him Spike Dudley headbutts the big man in the gut with a football helmet! Bubba recovers and flapjacks the 500lbs Big Show up and through the table to win the match. This was good fun but Big Show doesn’t think so and he roars in anger after the Dudleyz and Trish make their escape. 
• Backstage, William Regal and Christopher Nowinski discuss their tag team match against Booker T and Goldust later and bump into women’s champion Molly Holly and the debuting Victoria. Molly says she’s been training Victoria (who you might remember as one of the Godfather’s hoes in 2000) and she’s looking forward to her debut against Trish Stratus tonight. She seems like a nice, bland girl and when the women walk off, Nowinski pulls Victoria aside and asks if it's true Molly is a virgin. She confirms that she is, and Nowinski gives Regal a wink and says “not for long”

• Backstage, Goldust is upset about the recent release of Austin Powers: Goldmember and says Mike Myers stole his gimmick so he’s going to steal his and introduces his own Mini-Me. Mini-dust is a midget dressed as Goldust and he humps Booker T’s leg until he’s kicked off. 
• A video promoting the return of Kane which gives us our first glimpse of his new theme song, the awesome Slow Chemical by Finger Eleven. I’ll link to it when he actually shows up. 

• Booker T and Goldust - now officially a tag team it seems as Booker concedes that he does in fact like Goldust, take on William Regal and Christopher Nowinski. Raw has the Tag Team titles now so it makes sense for new teams to emerge. Nowinski and Regal put up a good fight but its a Scissors Kick and victory for Booker and Goldust. Booker is about to leave but Goldust stops him because the people want to see a Spinarooni. He gives it to them and the fans love it.
• Victoria makes her debut against Trish Stratus. There was no chance of enjoying this or taking it seriously as Molly Holly joins commentary and King relentlessly asks her about her virginity. I’ve never wanted to slap someone on TV more in my life. The fans were chanting for puppies but the match seems to end early as Victoria hurts her knee. Referees rush down to help her out of the ring and Trish holds the ropes open for her, only for Victoria to take a cheap shot. She wasn’t hurt and now has a big advantage over the former women’s champion. That was good. King’s commentary is insufferable and I instinctively swore out loud to myself multiple times. Victoria actually scores the win with a reversed roll up and grabbing the ropes for leverage. Trish attacks her after the match wanting some revenge so Molly rushes the ring and they beat on Trish two on one. She fights back and sends Victoria scurrying and drops Molly with a bulldog. This was good stuff, other than King’s commentary which made me angrier than I’ve been watching wrestling in my life.

Smackdown - August 8th 2002

The End of Hulkamania, and Raw Sabotage

Smackdown opens with a sentimental video about Hulk Hogan’s history and legacy in wrestling. It makes it seem like tonight, his match with Brock Lesnar, may be his last.

Backstage, Brock Lesnar decides to go and see Hulk Hogan and make sure he really wants to go ahead with their match tonight and have his career ended tonight. Paul Heyman tries to talk the Next Big Thing out of it but he pushes ahead anyway. His confidence is unshakeable. Hogan goads Lesnar and tells him that he’s so young and thinks he has the world at his feet so if he was him, he’d put his Summerslam title shot on the line in their match. Lesnar agrees! They leave and Heyman shouts at Lesnar like he’s crazy - he puts Hogan over as the legend who always overcomes the odds. Lesnar tells Heyman that he doesn’t need to be scared. He’s GOING to beat Hogan.

Paul Heyman goes to see Smackdown General Manager Stephanie McMahon to get the new stipulation on the Lesnar/Hogan match cancelled. She’s far too distracted looking for “legal aid” Dawn Marie as she has some time sensitive papers that need to be dealt with. She allows the stipulation to stand because whether its Rock vs. Brock or Rock vs. Hulk, the fans win. Heyman sarcastically tells her that she’s more like her father every day, which isn’t a compliment.

Back in Stephanie’s office, Dawn Marie drops by to see Steph with the documents she mentioned earlier. She finds Stacy Keibler who sows confusion - she mentions that Mr. McMahon is all alone at the Marriot hotel knowing Dawn will rush off to meet the boss and she leaves the paperwork with Stacy who promises she’ll get it to Stephanie, but when she leaves the room Stacy hides the envelope under the couch. She tells Stephanie that there was no paperwork and that Dawn went to meet her dad and after Stephanie apologises to Stacy for yelling at her last week and leaves. Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff emerges from the back of the room and with a smile, Stacy hands the paperwork to him confirming that she IS the Raw spy who’s been helping him steal all the Smackdown talent. 

Mark Lloyd interviews Hollywood Hulk Hogan about the main event and him now having a chance to go to Summerslam and challenge for the WWE Undisputed title. He says that based on his age, conventional wisdom says he has no chance but Hulkamania is the strongest force on Earth and already brought him back and helped him win the title at Backlash. He trusts his Hulkamaniacs to carry him through this match and to victory. Whatcha Gonna Do? Whatcha Gonna Do when Hulkamania runs wild on YOU?! That match is next so we can find out together.

Lesnar still looks supremely confident but Paul Heyman is worried that the Next Big Thing has bitten off more than he can chew. This is a slow match but the fans are red hot. Hogan withstands a lot of abuse to fight back and puts Brock down with a big boot and Leg Drop but Lesnar kicks out with ease and after a distraction by Paul Heyman, puts Hogan with with an F5. He doesn’t go for a cover and instead locks Hulk in a bear hub, squeezing the life out of Hogan as blood runs from his mouth. The referee stops the match and awards the decision to Brock Lesnar, who retains his Summerslam main event title shot in dominant fashion. Lesnar isn’t done and for good measure, he blasts Hogan with a steel chair as he struggles to get to his feet. The fans chant “Rocky” but there’s no left for a bloody Hogan. Lesnar might have finally ended Hulkamania. This actually is the last we’ll see of Hogan for a while. He had another behind the scenes fall out with Vince McMahon as he believed, amazingly, that he should be the one to return and end Brock’s undefeated streak and win the WWE title again. Obviously Vince didn’t think that the now 59 year old Hogan was right this time and it took a few months for them to agree on the next steps. For now, Lesnar looks like a God and is unstoppable heading into Summerslam, which is exactly what they wanted. 

Smackdown’s Young Guns

The first match is Kurt Angle vs. John Cena. I mentioned at Vengeance that I like Kurt’s red, white and blue camo gear. He must like it too because he’s worn it in every appearance since. Cena gives Angle a hard time and might have the match won by count out after sending Kurt head first into the ring steps. Chris Benoit comes from behind locking John Cena in the Crossface, handing Cena a victory by disqualification.

That brings out Rey Mysterio, then Eddie Guerrero and then finally Edge and the “young guns” fight off Benoit and Guerrero, drawing us into a loose “veterans vs. rookies” stand off. Rey, Edge and Cena are the future of Smackdown.

Backstage, Kurt takes issue with Benoit calling himself a submission master - he made Rock tap out last week - and says he’d have made Cena tap out too. Benoit cuts him off and says he’d have lost so they were saving him. Benoit says they jumped to Smackdown because it has better competition. Benoit and Angle get in each other’s face and seem to be working towards a match over who the real submission master is - a feud they settled in early 2001 - but Guerrero calms them down and instead suggests a six man tag tonight. Kurt laughs and says he thought they wanted real competition, assuming they’ll beat that team with no issues. Cena, Edge and Mysterio obviously accept the challenge.

In the locker room, John Cena, Edge and Rey Mysterio talk about their upcoming six man tag team match. This is a pretty famous segment as Rey was doing pullups on a shelf in the background and in an outtake, the shelf broke. That’s not included here. Cena is intense as he talks about wanting revenge on Benoit for the Crossface as Rey Mysterio calmly says not to worry about Kurt Angle - he’s got the Olympic hero.

It’s interesting that Intercontinental Champion Benoit, Guerrero and Angle have been positioned as the veterans vs. three fresh faces as Edge has actually been in WWE longer than any of the three of them and Angle has only been wrestling for a couple of years, even though it feels like he’s been a main eventer forever already. It is smart to visually and officially demonstrate to the fans “hey, these six guys are Smackdown’s top tier and on the same level” and it does huge favours for all of them quite frankly. The trio of Benoit, Guerrero and Angle isolate and work over Edge and then Cena for long periods. It dawned on me that it wouldn’t be long before all six of these men were World or WWE Champions. They really were the future.  This is a fun match and when it breaks down there’s a flurry of finishing moves. Kurt takes down Cena with the Angle slam but then walks right into Rey Mysterio’s West Coast Pop springboard hurricanrana into a roll up to win the match. That’s a shocker and Kurt is beside himself with anger. After a commercial break, Kurt is walking through the back and looks very upset. Mark Lloyd asks him how he feels - Kurt says he just got pinned by a 12 year old and he keeps losing because of people running in, getting him disqualified and referees screwing him. Rey wasn’t the legal man when he pinned Kurt. Angle says that he’s going to break Rey’s ankle the next time he meets him in the ring.

Other Happenings

• Reverend D-Von (with Batista) takes on The World’s Strongest Man Mark Henry. He fights off Batista’s interference to put down D-Von with a powerslam and picks up the win. Batista attacks Mark after the match and spikes him with his big spinebuster but before D-Von and Batista can keep the attack going, their victim from last week Rikishi runs down to make the save. He challenges Batista to a match and he accepts which gives us a second impromptu singles match. D-Von tries to help but it backfires and he hits his own man which leads to a superkick and Rikishi gives Batista his first loss. He bails out quickly avoiding another beat down and that leaves Reverend D-Von and Batista arguing in the ring. 

• Backstage there’s chaos as Torrie Wilson in her underwear has a furious fight with Nidia, as Jamie Noble and Billy Kidman plus several other backstage officials try to separate the two women. It’s not clear what started the fight but it sets up a mixed tag team match for later in the show.

• Billy and Chuck (with Rico who has apparently been racking up regular wins on Smackdown’s other weekly show Velocity) take on The Hurricane and a debuting Shannon Moore. This is Shannon’s Smackdown debut but he’s also been on Velocity a few times recently and despite his age he is a former WCW cruiserweight performer too. This is a rematch as Rico helped Billy and Chuck win their last match on Velocity. Maybe I should be watching Velocity? In what has to be considered a huge upset, Hurricane and Moore overcome interference by Rico (Billy actually used him as a human shield on the outside) to pick up the victory with a victory roll by Moore on Chuck. 
• Before the mixed tag team match, Nidia and Noble go over to remind Michael Cole he needs to say nice things about them this week. Tazz teases Cole about he and Nidia’s make out session last week for the whole match. In a chaotic finish, Noble gets a cheap shot on Torrie allowing Nidia to roll her up and win the match for the trailer park team.

Raw - August 12th 2002

Un-American Main Event

Raw opens with the reveal that Smackdown’s Brock Lesnar is here. He and Paul Heyman are sitting in the front row and Brock is wearing a Hulkamania t-shirt after beating and bloodying the Hulkster on Smackdown. The Rock is here tonight which presumably is why his Summerslam challenger has made an appearance. Backstage, Eric Bischoff tells security that he believes Stephanie McMahon is behind this and they better keep an eye on the pair of them. If they step out of line, he wants them thrown out of the arena.

Triple H makes his way down to the ring and, as I hinted at a couple of weeks ago, has changed up his look. No longer in his traditional denim and leather he’s wearing smart casual clothes. He looks like the manager of a fast food restaurant. He explains why he turned on Shawn - they were never best friends. They used each other to get to the top and stay there. There’s no friends in this business, and he is the better business man. He’s won more titles and main evented more PPVs and is better than Shawn Michaels ever was. He then turns his attention to the fans - he says the last eight months of having them cheer him has been awful. The chanting for him makes him sick and makes him weak to the point where he even loses to an old piece of crap like Hulk Hogan. He ends with a warning for Shawn Michaels - he’s coming to Summerslam not to fight him or wrestle him but to maim him and end his career permanently this time. His endless speech where he says “Shawn” about 86 times is eventually interrupted by the WWE Undisputed Champion The Rock. He ignores Triple H and starts talking trash to Brock Lesnar, promising him an ass whooping of a life time but he’s not waiting until Summerslam, he can get it tonight! He walks down to the ring but Triple H cuts him off. This back and forth “shut up and let me handle my business” back and forth between The Rock and Triple H is the origins of an iconic meme, The Rock’s “shut up bitch!” The Rock gets in the ring and he and Triple H both refuse to back down. The Rock tells Triple H to leave because this doesn’t concern him so The Game attacks him and they start fighting. Brock Lesnar jumps onto the apron which distracts The Rock enough for Triple H to plant him with a Pedigree which puts a big smile on Lesnar and Heyman’s face. They smartly leave assuming Bischoff’s security will come out to make them leave anyway and Triple H leaves the Undisputed Champion down and out in the ring.

After a commercial break, The Rock is fired up but since he can’t have Lesnar tonight he wants Triple H! Bischoff is reluctant to commit to such a big match at short notice but The Rock tells him to make it happen.

Un-American’s Lance Storm and Christian now have t-shirts proudly displaying an upside down American flag. The angrier that makes JR the funnier I find it. Booker T has Goldust and mini-dust with him for back up. Turns out Mini-dust wasn’t a one off gag. Christian trips Booker T which almost costs him the match so Goldust returns the favour and chases Christian off and gets a cheap shot on Storm allowing Booker to follow with the Scissors Kick to win the match and bag a Tag Team title match at Summerslam for he and Goldust. Test rushes the ring and attacks but that just brings out The Undertaker as backup. He chases off Test, and Booker T and Goldust chase the Tag Team Champions through the crowd. Mini-dust isn’t able to follow and struggles to climb the barrier which gets some laughs.

After a commercial break, Eric Bischoff is in the ring and announces tonight’s main event - a massive eight man tag team match of The Un-Americans and Triple H vs. Booker T, Goldust, The Undertaker and The Rock. He also has Mini-dust with him who he then says stopped entertaining him three minutes ago. That’s the cue and Rosey and Jamal run down and destroy the poor midget with a huge slam and then a powerslam off the top rope. The fans explode - their methods of hurting people are definitely eye catching! Bischoff then introduces us to the newest Raw signee, Stacy Keibler. She removes her skirt and dances around in her underwear as King squeals like he’s never seen a woman before. Obviously Stacy is incredible looking but even as a man it’s hard to enjoy this kind of segment with Jerry Lawler screaming the whole time. There’s a sort of grim comedy to the segment as it cuts back and forth between the midget being put on a stretcher and Stacy’s dancing. I’m sure that’s what they were going for - Bischoff’s circus is in full swing.

Terri interviews the Un-Americans. Christian says that with freaks and jive talkers like Booker T, no wonder America is now the United States of Embarrassment. Test tells us that Eric Bischoff has given him a one on one match with the Undertaker at Summerslam. Lance Storm says he can’t wait for tonight’s eight man main event because he can get his hands on The Rock too. 

Heading into the main event, it’s wild that Undertaker and Triple H have so seamlessly switched places as face and heel. There’s been no mention yet of whether Undertaker and The Rock have an issue teaming up considering they wanted to kill each other last month but when the match begins everyone is very focused on the opponents tonight. The Rock pretty aggressively throws the title belt into the ring as he poses on the top rope which looked really disrespectful to me. Odd choice. This has a fun house show feel as the babyfaces take turns bouncing the heels around and the fans go nuts. Booker T is shut down by a double team from Storm and Christian and the heel quartette tag in and out and grind down Booker for a long time as the fans chant “we want Taker”. They get him when Booker finally makes a hot tag and the crowd explode as the American Badass motors through the Un-Americans and has no problem destroying all three of them. The match breaks down and it’s awesome as the men all trade big moves as the fans go nuts for everything. The Rock has it won with a Rock Bottom on Lance Storm but Triple H pulls him out of the ring and as they fight, Undertaker is alone. He chokeslams Storm and sets up a Last Ride on Christian but in a cool spot, as he lifts Christian Test boots him in the face and that's enough to give Triple H and the Un-Americans the victory. That was a very good main event.

The Hardyz End, RVD moves Forward

Backstage, Eric Bischoff tells RVD that he gets his rematch for the Intercontinental title at Summerslam against Smackdown’s Chris Benoit. That was the paperwork that Stephanie was trying to shred on Smackdown but Stacy Keibler helped Bischoff out and he recovered them so now Raw has a chance to bring the IC title back to Raw at Summerslam. Matt Hardy asks if he can have a match with Rob Van Dam tonight with that very IC title match on the line. Bischoff decides to flip a coin to see whether Matt or Jeff will get that opportunity. It’s heads and so Jeff gets a match with RVD to see who faces Benoit for the title at Summerslam, even though Matt suggested it. He looks pretty annoyed about that.

Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Dam with the winner facing Chris Benoit to try and bring the Intercontinental title back to Raw at Summerslam. I like the way this story has woven together with the multiple threads here - Stacy acting as Bischoff’s spy on Smackdown, the continuing Raw vs. Smackdown rivalry, Matt and Jeff’s desires to be singles stars getting a little tense. Lots of little stories leading into what is on the surface a normal Raw match but actually has a fair bit of history and something big on the line. This is a good match and as the two battle on the top rope, Jeff shoves RVD off and he crashes into the referee. Jeff misses the Swanton but with the referee down, Matt Hardy runs down and lays out Jeff with a Twist of Fate. RVD is none the wiser and follows up with a Frog Splash to score the victory and officially go to Summerslam. The big story is that Matt Hardy has turned on his brother Jeff and officially drawn a line under The Hardyz for good. 

Other Happenings

• Trish Stratus and Spike Dudley take on the team of Christopher Nowinski and Molly Holly. Earlier today, Nowinski tried to get Molly’s ex boyfriend Spike to talk about their sex life. He refused and Nowinski smugly promised a random backstage member of staff he was going to make Molly his “val-dick-torian”. He looks unbothered. Before the match, Trish slaps Howard Finkle for what he caused to happen to poor Lillian Garcia last week. He deserved that. Nowinski picks up the win for his team with a double underhook into a slam on Spike.

• Backstage, Goldust corners Eric Bischoff and suggests that if Booker T defeats Lance Storm tonight, Goldust and Booker get a shot at the Tag Team titles at Summerslam. Bischoff agrees and interestingly also refers to them as the World Tag Team titles, which is what they became known as permanently a couple of months later.
• In the ring, Howard Finkle defends his actions from last week and says that he is Raw’s lead ring announcer and that Lillian Garcia got what she deserved. The smug smile is wiped off his face when Kane’s pyro explodes. Howard is terrified but Kane isn’t here tonight - it’s just a warning. Kane will be back soon.

• Big Show teams with Chris Jericho against the two men they’ve been feuding with lately - Bubba Ray Dudley and Ric Flair. Jericho and Show isolate and focus their attacks on Ric Flair’s back who bumps and sells for them like he’s dying. JR and King suggest that Flair’s announcement a couple of weeks ago which Jericho ruined was that he wanted to move to Smackdown to get away from Eric Bischoff which certainly would have made sense. Wanting to even the score with Jericho is as good a reason as any to stay on Raw now. This turned into a really good match and Bubba deserves a lot of credit for how good he’s been since the brand split. Jericho uses a low blow and locks Bubba in the Walls of Jericho to give him and Show the victory by submission. The fighting continues and Flair humiliates Jericho by pulling down his tights! Show stops him from being able to lock the Figure Four in but the damage to his pride has been done. 

• When Jericho gets backstage he’s asked for his thoughts by Jonathan Coachman. Jericho is angry and wants to get even with Ric Flair. He announces that his band Fozzy will perform live on Raw next week, and challenges the Nature Boy to a match at Summerslam.
• In an attempt to remind us who Shawn Michaels is and how good he was in his prime there’s a video package about him and I love it so here it is

• Tommy Dreamer defends the Hardcore championship against Steven Richards. According to JR, both men have agreed to limit themselves to a single weapon for this match - Richards has a steel chair, Dreamer has a kendo stick. This is a fun back and forth match with both men hitting each other as hard as they can with their respective weapons but in the end the chair is Richard’s undoing. The stick breaks on the chair so Dreamer is forced to improvise and knocks Steven out with his own chair to the head to retain the title. 

• Eric Bischoff goes to the production truck and yells at producer Kevin Dunn for the Smackdown commercial which was shown during the last break A very rare on screen appearance for the WWE’s legit head of TV for several decades. Bischoff is furious at Smackdown for promoting their main events during HIS show so he announces next week’s Raw main event - Triple H vs. The Rock. 

Smackdown - August 15th 2002

Summerslam’s Main Event gets Ready

Smackdown opens with Brock Lesnar, wearing a Hulkamania t-shirt, and Paul Heyman. Heyman reminds us of what Lesnar did last week and shows footage not just of the beating of Hulk Hogan but of the aftermath when after the cameras stopped rolling Hogan struggled to get to his feet. He calls Hogan a stepping stone and just a message and the ultimate trophy will come at Summerslam. Brock says that just like he ended Hulkamania, he’ll end The Rock’s title reign at Summerslam. That brings out Lesnar’s opponent tonight on Smackdown, Rikishi. He’s not dressed to compete so the match isn’t happening yet. Rikishi wastes no time and attacks Brock and actually wins the exchange, clotheslining him out of the ring. Lesnar does save Heyman from getting a Stink Face at least.

Stephanie McMahon yells at Dawn Marie for not putting the paperwork directly into her hands last week. Because of her, Chris Benoit now has to defend the Intercontinental title against Rob Van Dam at Summerslam and Smackdown is in danger of losing the Intercontinental Championship. Stephanie asks to see Benoit and when he comes to see her, she says she has full confidence in him beating RVD and keeping the title on Smackdown. She tells Benoit to make an example of The Rock tonight in the main event. She tells him to make The Rock tap out tonight and he says he’s going to make The Rock squeal for him tonight. 

Brock Lesnar has a lot of difficulty with Rikishi who continues to be one of the most consistently pushed and protected people on Smackdown. Rikishi muscles out of a bear hug and is about to give Lesnar the Stink Face until Paul Heyman gets in the ring. Rikishi squashes him in the corner and decides to Stink Face him instead, even fighting off an attack from behind by Lesnar to do it. Lesnar ends the good times with a huge F5 to put down the big man and win the match. 

Mark Lloyd interviews The Rock before tonight’s main event. He reminds The Rock that Chris Benoit made him submit two weeks ago. The Rock has some fun with Mark Lloyd asking what Benoit means by making him squeal. Mark misunderstands what Rock is asking and bends over. It’s more gay jokes but it was 2002 so we’ll let it slide I guess. Lesnar is shown watching his promo from the shadows.

Before the main event as The Rock makes his entrance, a huge banner walks through the crowd advertising this week’s Raw main event. Tazz and Cole have a laugh at the nerve of Eric Bischoff to advertise his show during Smackdown and mention an advert earlier for Subway which Bischoff also did but was pretty transparently a commercial for Raw. That wasn’t shown on my version of this show but it sounds funny.

These two have a long history and this is another solid match between the two with Intercontinental Champion Benoit controlling the match and the pace. Benoit uses his old diving headbutt of the top rope for the first time since his neck surgery too. The Rock prepares to drop the People’s Elbow but sees Lesnar coming down the ramp so jumps out of the ring to stare him down. He pays for it as Benoit jumps The Rock from behind to resume the match. The fans chant “Hogan” but he’s not here and won’t be any time soon. The Rock guts it out and refuses to tap to the Crossface, making it to the ropes and connecting with a Rock Bottom out of nowhere to win the match and end Smackdown daring a smiling Next Big Thing to Just Bring It, which Lesnar doesn’t. Not until Summerslam champ. 

Olympian vs. Luchadore

Mark Lloyd interviews Kurt Angle. He mentions that Rey Mysterio pinned him last week in a six man tag. Kurt cuts him off and gets a bit racist about Mexicans. And JR wonders why the Un-Americans hate America. As he keeps insulting Rey, the man himself approaches and he challenges Kurt Angle to a match at Summerslam since Kurt doesn’t think his win counted. Kurt laughs at the idea but when Rey doesn’t back down and promises to shut him up then Angle accepts. As Rey walks off, Mark Henry overhears all Kurt’s jokes about little men and calls him little man. Kurt asks if World's Strongest man refers to strength or body odor? That leads to a match between the two next.

Mark puts up a good fight but tweaks his ankle on a jump to the outside and it leads to an ankle lock and a submission victory for Kurt Angle. After the match, Rey Mysterio appears on the top rope and dives into a hurricanrana and then connects with a 619 which bursts Kurt open somehow - his boot laces must have caught Kurt above the eye or something. 

Backstage, Eddie and Chavo Guerrero prepare for their tag team match tonight. They’re on the phone to their grandma and pass on messages to a long list of family members. Chavo says they’ll make them pay for Edge spearing Eddie last week but Eddie cuts him off and denies it ever happened - he’s never been speared! They talk about how their smiles are way nicer than Edge’s. This is all very funny.

This should be an excellent tag team match and I think it’s a really nice touch that Eddie and Chavo have matching ring gear already. They are nephew and uncle, but so close in age they’re more like brothers and have been wrestling together since they were very young. This is the start of a long standing partnership and this isn’t the last time these two teams will clash this year. No spoilers but it all gets very, very good over the next couple of months. Rey of course has a lot of history from WCW with both Eddie and Chavo and in real life, they were all very, very close friends. The action is very good but the match ends with a disqualification victory for Edge and Rey when Kurt Angle jerks Rey off the apron and locks him in the ankle lock. Edge Spears Eddie on the outside and then Spears both Chavo and finally Angle in the ring to save Mysterio before too much damage can be done. 

Other Happenings

• In a six man tag team match, Hurricane and Shannon Moore team with Hardcore Holly against Billy, Chuck and Rico. Much like the tag team match last week, a lot of the build up here took place on Velocity as Holly used a pair of clippers to take a little chunk of Rico’s hair so he responded with a superkick sneak attack when Holly was at ringside. It breaks down and Billy picks up the win for his team with a sleeper slam on Shannon Moore. They try to keep the attack going after the match but Raw’s Matt Hardy runs down and makes the save, attacking Billy and Chuck and then hugging and celebrating with Hurricane and Shannon Moore. Michael Cole quickly mentions that The Hardyz trained Shannon Moore and have been friends with Hurricane for a long time. That’s all true - all of those guys came from the same place and have known each other for years. In the next segment, Stephanie McMahon confirms that she has signed Matt to Smackdown now. Later they’re all celebrating backstage. Hardcore Holly seems unimpressed by Matt Hardy and Hurricane looks a little bit off put by his ego too as he talks about how much the crowd loved him. He says Smackdown is ready for “Matt Hardy, Version one”

• This Smackdown is the birth of “Funaki - Smackdown’s Number One Announcer”. He doesn’t debut his catchphrase yet but the comedy is mostly that English isn’t his first language. He interviews Nidia about her match with Torrie Wilson tonight. She doesn’t want to talk about that and instead talks about how hot she and her body is, even offering to let him touch her butt. He refuses because of Jamie Noble. That match is next and Torrie has Billy Kidman for backup while Nidia has her boyfriend, Cruiserweight Champion Jamie Noble. Nidia picks up the win when, after a fight on the outside by Noble and Kidman, she uses the cruiserweight title belt as a weapon. After the match, Kane’s pyro explodes and just like on Raw it’s teased he’s about to show up but Kane’s not here tonight.

• In the locker room, Funaki’s interview with Nidia is interrupted by a loud argument between Batista and Reverend D-Von which ends with Batista slamming D-Von through a door and bellowing “THERE’s your respect!” That would appear to be the end of that partnership.

Raw - August 19th 2002

The Rock and The Game - One Last Time

The Rock arrives at the arena and a member of staff hands him a package from Paul Heyman. He makes a bunch of jokes about viagra, rogaine and other insulting things. This is somewhat noteworthy as its the first time The Rock ever referred to himself as Dwayne Johnson on WWE television. That’s because he’s trying to take off as an actor now and is marketing his real name. The package contains a bunch of glossy high quality photos of Hulk Hogan, beaten and bloody, by Brock Lesnar. The Rock just smirks and dumps them on the floor for us to see. 

Triple H heads down to the ring. I’ve mentioned it on the last couple of shows but his rebrand is almost complete as once again he’s in a polo shirt and smart dress pants and shoes. Still got his beard and hair slicked back though. He’s dressed like Tiger Woods.

He has some paperwork which he says he’s also sent to Shawn Michaels - it’s a “hold harmless agreement” which is a work of wrestling fiction but it’s a contract that says that if and when Triple H cripples Shawn Michaels he’s unable to sue him or the company because of it. He refuses to wrestle Shawn at Summerslam unless he signs them. He then turns his attention to Brock Lesnar - Triple H is facing The Rock tonight in a non-title match and its now no disqualification so not only is he going to send a message to Shawn Michaels, he’ll be softening The Rock up for him and will leave a little piece of him to show up at Summerslam. When Brock shows up on Raw next week as champion, it’ll be thanks to Triple H and he wants his title shot next. The Game has some lofty goals tonight. He is interrupted by, of all people, Chris Jericho which is a shock to everyone. Seems that this is just Jericho being petty because Triple H interrupted him last week. He says they have something in common - they’ve both facing old hasbeens at Summerslam. He talks about how great he is and how much Ric Flair sucks until Ric comes from behind and puts a trash can over Jericho’s head and shoves him down the entrance ramp. That ends the segment. It was all important information but an odd segment none the less. I’ve moved the rest of Jericho and Flair’s interactions to the next section to keep this one focused on Triple H and The Rock.

Before the main event, Coach interviews The Rock who makes fun of Triple H and talks about all the times they’ve wrestled in the past going all the way back to caveman days. He’s funny and he’s right - they’ve wrestled many, many times now. The important historical note is that this is the last time, ever. The Rock and Triple H were never in the ring together again after this episode of Raw. He then talks about Brock Lesnar and there’s another gift from Paul Heyman - a video montage of Brock destroying people set to ominous music.

Eric Bischoff calls Triple H into his office. He tells him that Shawn Michaels has returned the paperwork signed and the match is official. Bischoff still isn’t happy about the risk to the company so he refuses to sanction the match meaning their match at Summerslam is just a fight with no rules. Triple H promises that Michaels won’t sue because he won’t be able to.

In The Rock’s locker room he’s amped up for the main event and his mobile phone rings but he’s too focused and doesn’t answer it. I wonder if it was ominous? In the arena, Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman arrive through the crowd and reveal that it was Paul Heyman on the phone who leaves a message for the “People’s voicemail”. They take a seat at ringside to watch The Rock vs. Triple H up close. After a commercial break, Eric Bischoff and security are there to warn the pair of them that if they get involved they will be ejected from the building.

 I say “end of an era” a lot in these articles but seeing The Rock and Triple H across the ring for each other for the final time is oddly emotional to me. I wonder if they knew? Certainly everyone was aware that The Rock would be taking another long leave of absence from WWE after Summerslam as his Hollywood commitments increased.

Triple H focuses his attack on The Rock’s ribs but the champion guts it out and comes back with a spinebuster and People’s Elbow. Triple H kicks out and regains control with the ringsteps as a weapon and gets his sledgehammer from under the ring. Brock Lesnar hops the barrier as Triple H knocks down the referee. Its chaotic as he gets ready to hit The Rock with his sledgehammer but Shawn Michaels runs down and attacks Triple H. He knocks Brock Lesnar off the apron and as Triple H fights The Rock, he hits Brock with Sweet Chin Music sending him flying out of the ring. The Rock hits a messy looking Rock Bottom on Triple H and with Brock leaving through the crowd and Triple H escaping up the ramp, The Rock runs after Lesnar to fight him. Shawn jumps over the top rope and lands on Triple H and the security guards and Raw ends with a chaotic, wild brawl on the ramp between HBK and The Game. The last ever Rock vs. Triple H match ends in a no contest with no winner or loser, which is oddly fitting

Flair and Jericho at War

Later as Terri interviews Ric Flair he’s attacked by Chris Jericho with a trash can and he busts the Nature Boy open and leaves him a bloody mess, even attacking referees who try to stop him. Jericho keeps screaming that he’s the King of the World which is his newest catchphrase.

Chris Jericho’s band Fozzy performs towards the end of the show. Jericho turned the band heel earlier and had the fans chanting “Fozzy sucks” at him during his segment with Triple H earlier. If you like heavy metal you might quite like Fozzy but they are ultimately a fairly unremarkable band. Jericho seems satisfied with their success. King keeps shouting compliments for the band as Jericho performs their song “To Kill a Stranger” in full. The fans boo at the end and Jericho calls them jackasses and says they’re going to play a second song but thankfully, Ric Flair shows up and smashes the equipment up which was pretty cool. Jericho in the ring screams and looks despondent as loud static and electrical distortion downs everything out as Flair destroys the very real amps and speakers before running towards the ring with a guitar to attack Jericho. The King of the World escapes through the crowd.

Un-American Momentum

Raw opens with The Undertaker who gives a lengthy rah rah speech about how much he loves America and what it means to be an American. He talks about freedom and the troops who defend their freedom. If you’ve ever heard an American speak publicly about their country you can guess almost word for word what he says. I noticed it a few weeks ago but it’s very noticeable here - Undertaker has stopped dying his hair and beard since turning babyface and is very ginger. It makes him look younger I think.

His love of America is interrupted by his Summerslam opponent, Un-American Test who rides to the ring on a motorbike to Undertaker’s own theme music. He says that not only does America suck, so does the American Badass. That obviously starts a fight and Tag Team Champions Christian and Lance Storm follow to make it three on one. Their Summerslam opponents and challengers follow after and Booker T and Goldust help Undertaker clear the three Un-Americans out of the ring. Booker challenges them to a six man tag team match later tonight which they accept.

When they enter for the six man tag, Undertaker actually seems quite friendly with Booker T and Goldust. That’s the spirit of America I guess. Hilariously as the Un-Americans enter we can see that no one has cleared up all the trash from the previous Ric Flair segment where he dumped the contents of a trash can. Lazy. After an initial flurry the Un-Americans shut down Booker T and isolate him tagging in and out to keep him in their corner. It breaks down and Undertaker spikes Storm with a massive chokeslam. He and Test fight on the outside and Christian clocks Goldust with one of the Tag Title belts to give the Un-American’s the victory. 

The Death of Feminism

Back in Eric Bischoff’s office, Stacy Keibler and Trish Stratus have a deeply unfeminist argument calling each other sluts and undeserving of a women’s title match. Bischoff enters and tells them both that no one cares about women’s wrestling so lets give the people what they really want - a bra and panties match in a mud pit. I don’t see the point in this whatsoever, burying the entire division like that.

That match is next and unlike a normal bra and panties match where the goal is to strip each other, they are both already in their underwear. Stacy jumps Trish from behind and throws her off the entrance ramp into the mud pit which was a crazy bump for such a nonsense match. This is what you’d expect and they scrap in the mud and pull the referee into the pit too and he gets covered, head to toe. I’m not a prude but I can’t see how this is even exciting - they’ve entirely covered, you can’t see an inch of their actual bodies. Every time I praise the women's division, they do something like this. Trish “wins” with a roll up on Stacy and then shoves Howard Finkle into the mud too. 

Other Happenings

• With the ring full of competitors (including Terri), Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff comes out and announces that the Hardcore title’s 24/7 rule is no more and is abolished. Everyone in the ring is a former Hardcore champion and has a chance to win it. This is a 6 minute scramble and whoever holds the Hardcore title at the end of the 6 minutes is the official WWE Hardcore Champion with no more 24/7 rule to worry about. Terri obviously immediately runs away. It’s frantic and Bradshaw wins it early on and then holds everyone off with weapon shots for most of the match. Stupidly everyone wrestles and fights each other instead of focusing on Bradshaw. Crash Holly does win the title in there somewhere and after being powerbombed through a table by Bubba Ray, Tommy Dreamer steals the cover to regain his title. There’s a mad rush to cover Tommy Dreamer but the time expires and at the end of the six minutes Tommy Dreamer is the Hardcore Champion. This turned out to be the last ever Hardcore Championship match, but I'll talk about that in the next Preview. 

• At the end of the Hardcore Championship scramble there’s another Kane video hyping his return but…Kane isn’t here tonight.
• Backstage, Eric Bischoff stresses to Rob Van Dam how serious his Summerslam match is and how much he wants the Intercontinental title back on Raw. They’re interrupted by Big Show who is angry he isn’t the one challenging for the title. A little back and forth leads to Show vs. RVD being booked for tonight but Eric asks them to keep it clean because he can’t risk RVD being injured tonight so close to Summerslam. That match is up next and RVD hits fast and moves quick but Show is angry and focused. He uses the ringsteps as a weapon and is about to smash RVD with them in the ring when Eric Bischoff comes out and tells him to stop. He TOLD him that he needed RVD to be 100% at Summerslam. He starts shouting “three minutes” until Rosey and Jamal rush the ring and attack Big Show two on one, laying him out and splashing him. I think RVD technically wins the match by disqualification but the important thing is that Show is pissed off and come out of this looking strong, despite the beating from Bischoff’s three minute warning henchmen.

Smackdown - August 22nd 2002

Rock vs. Brock

Smackdown opens with Paul Heyman and the number one contender for the WWE Undisputed Championship Brock Lesnar. Heyman calls the Next Big Thing the biggest box office draw in WWE and the next WWE Champion. He also says Brock doesn’t want to wait and guarantees that he and The Rock will collide tonight. Brock says he feels like he did the night he ended Hulk Hogan’s career and he’s going to make The Rock “cry like a bitch”. That brings the People’s Champion out onto the stage and looks like he’s spoiling for a fight too. The Rock is done talking and he keeps telling Lesnar to “just bring it” but since he hasn’t. He’ll bring it to him. The Rock drops the title and his sunglasses and heads down to the ring for a fight but is attacked from behind by Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero and locked in the Crippler Crossface, needing many referees to finally get them off the champion while Heyman and Lesnar have a good laugh at The Rock’s misfortune. 

Benoit and Guerrero aren’t done and after a commercial break as Edge is shown arriving at the arena they rush and attack him too. 

Smackdown GM Stephanie McMahon tells off Benoit and Guerrero later for what they did to The Rock earlier. They put the Summerslam main event in danger and if he now can’t compete they will both receive dramatic pay cuts. She approved of the Benoit/Rock match last week but this week it was an unsanctioned attack. She says Bischoff almost screwed up by letting Triple H break The Rock’s ribs on Raw and mentions that Eddie has a match with Edge at Summerslam now. Edge attacks them both from behind with a steel chair and asks Stephanie to make the main event between him and The Rock vs. Benoit and Guerrero tonight. She agrees.

There’s a video where Brock Lesnar shows off his work out routine including many of the extreme exercises he does to keep his body in peak condition. It’s very impressive - the guy was always a freak athlete. This same video, plus one for The Rock, is also shown at Summerslam so you can see them there. 

The Rock gets checked out in the trainers office and Edge drops into see him. He wants to talk about their tag team main event. Edge is a bit concerned about his health. The Rock fires up and isn’t for a second concerned. He says he’d fight with broken ribs, one arm or even whoop their candy asses with only one leg! Edge gets into it and finishes his line about shoving something up Benoit and Guerrero’s candy asses! 

As the big main event tag team match begins, Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman are shown watching backstage, scouting The Rock ahead of Summerslam. Eddie and Benoit isolate Edge in the early going. After a spell, The Rock gets a hot tag and motors through both and scores a People’s Elbow on Eddie but Benoit breaks up the pin and assaults him on the outside, targeting his ribs on the announce table and the match continues with them double teaming The Rock now. The Rock spends a long, long time in the Crossface but after a DDT makes the tag to Edge who quickly uses his burst of energy to put down Eddie with a Spear and wins the match for his team. This was good but slow. The Rock and Edge very briefly celebrate until Brock Lesnar runs down to the ring. The Rock asks Edge to leave and the two start to brawl with Lesnar getting an attack on Rock’s hurt ribs to easily take advantage. The Rock fights back and sends Lesnar packing with a string of big right hands, with Heyman there to hold Brock back after he’s knocked out of the ring. Smackdown ends with a big stare down between Summerslam’s main eventers.

Mysterio is a thorn in Angle’s side

Michael Cole interviews Rey Mysterio backstage who reminds us that he pinned Kurt Angle in a tag team match so he thinks he has a good chance of doing it again at Summerslam. He’s interrupted by Kurt Angle who calls him crazy and tells him to watch his match next as he requested one with fellow cruiserweight Billy Kidman to make an example of him. He tells Rey he better not see him or his mask anywhere near the ring during it. That match is right up next and is very fast paced and I think could be a spectacular match if these two guys were given lots of time. Kurt has control when Mysterio appears at the top of the ramp which distracts Angle enough to make him chase Rey, almost getting counted out. This was a really good match with Kidman giving Angle a hard time and coming close to victory more than once. The referee is accidentally knocked down by Angle so he takes advantage to get a steel chair which almost costs him as Kidman dropkicks it back into his face for another very close near fall when the referee revives. Rey runs down again and this time attacks with a seated senton so Kurt chases him again and this time he is counted out, giving Kidman a victory. Kurt attacks Kidman with mounted punches and then throws him over the top rope in a rage.

Other Happenings

• Cruiserweight action as champion Jamie Noble and Tajiri take on The Hurricane and Shannon Moore. The action is very good and fast paced as we now expect from the cruiserweights. In an upset, Shannon Moore reverses Noble’s powerbomb into a roll up to steal victory over the champion. Noble and Tajiri attack after the match but the good guys hold them off. They’re in no danger but Matt Hardy runs down to the ring to celebrate with them and actually makes them lift him onto their shoulders. He acts like he’s the centre of attention and steals their spotlight a bit.

• After a commercial break, Matt brags to them both backstage about how loud the crowd was for him. He gets a great reaction everywhere he goes and bets them that if he goes back out he’ll get an even bigger reaction! Matt does and heads out onto the stage with his theme music playing just to pose and get the fans to cheer him. After a couple of minutes of that, Chavo Guerrero comes out and he challenges Matt to a match. Matt seems to be drifting into conceited heel territory but a match with heel Chavo blurs the lines a little. As Matt sets up for a Twist of Fate, another video plays promoting the return of Kane. It distracts Matt enough for Chavo to roll him up and win the match. Matt “got screwed” but in fairness, he had the victory before that and was too focused on showing off for the fans and screwed himself. After the match, Matt argues with the referee and blames it on him.
• Smackdown’s Number One Announcer Funaki, holding back childish giggles, takes us into the women’s locker room for an exclusive interview with a topless Nidia who is scheduled to challenge Molly Holly for the women’s title later. Molly Holly is very bothered by Funaki and the camera’s presence but Nidia is less bothered and is happy to show off and encourage him. Molly calls her disgusting and loose so Nidia says that if she wins the title tonight she’ll take her top off and let everyone see her bare breasts tonight on Smackdown. 

• The team of Rikishi and John Cena face Reverend D-Von and Batista. Batista still looks frosty towards D-Von after their argument turned physical last week. They’re still trying to make it work I guess. Far more noteworthy is that this is the first time future main eventers and world champions Batista and John Cena were in the same match, which feels like a big deal. In the middle of the match, Batista has had enough of D-Von telling him what to do so he flattens the Reverend with a spinebuster and leaves him as easy pickings for Rikishi and a banzai drop to give him and Cena the victory.
• Jamie Noble is at ringside with Nidia for her big women’s title match. Tazz and Cole are now cheering for Nidia because of her promise to get topless when she wins. I can only imagine how insufferable this would be with Jerry Lawler on commentary. This is the first time I’ve noticed that the women’s title has now been updated to have the WWE logo on it, joining the Cruiserweight and Undisputed title belts as the only ones to not still have WWF on them. Noble helps Nidia cheat but Molly overcomes it and wins to retain her title with a Molly Go Round. After the match, Noble tells Nidia not to be sad and to strip anyway so Molly hits him from behind causing him to crash into his own girlfriend and puts a stop to that.

• Smackdown General Manager comes out onto the stage and thanks everyone for supporting the superior show, Smackdown. She says her brand’s contributions to Summerslam are far greater than Raws and cues up a video running down all of the matches for the PPV which is pretty cool and lets us hear the event theme song, which is a WWE owned song - Fight by Jim Johnson. It’s pretty cool but I wonder why they couldn’t get a band for this PPV? Maybe they didn’t try and just really liked this song. You can see the video at the end of this preview.

Five weeks packed with new characters like Eric Bischoff, lots of big roster changes and the build up to what in my opinion is the greatest Summerslam card of all time. Every match (almost) is a worthy PPV main event at one time or another, something I also said about the Wrestlemania X8 card. The roster of 2002 is loaded with former, current or future main eventers and world champions. I’m excited for this one, and here’s the video running down the card from above.